Aibu to wonder if people really go to their gp to pour out their deep dark feelings?

[pelicantown]

I keep seeing people advising posters to go to their gp about a massive range of personal issues - from abuse, to relationship problems, depression etc etc. Which is great but I just cannot imagine how these meetings actually go.

My experience of gp appointments is awkward silence and a follow up appointment where there is more awkward silence. I seriously can't imagine ever telling my gp anything actually personal (even though I have plenty of issues I could technically do with help for!)

It's not my gp I have had various gps and it's all the same. Is it me seriously? Am I just a terrible patient?

Aibu to wonder if all then "see your gp" posts ever actually end in a gp appointment that isn't just pointless?!

GPs spend a significant amount of their time dealing with MH issues as for the majority, they're not considered severe enough to require anything more (rightly or wrongly as this may be).

But yes, unless your relationship breakdown or work issue is actually causing you significant stress/anxiety/depression beyond the normal worry or sadness, the GP isn't the right place.

I'm a GP. Patients talk to me about everything under the sun. And cry - a lot. I don't remember any 'awkward silences' - my surgeries would run a lot quicker if my patients would fall silent more often.

I think many people don't find it at all easy to discuss their feelings with others, either strangers or close to them.

I've encouraged posters on here in the past to see their GP, mostly because they say things like "I haven't slept properly for three months, I can't stop crying, I wish I didn't exist, I'm so tired, I don't think I've ever felt happy", and also "but I don't want to bother the doctor, other people are so much worse off than me, my mum says I should pull my socks up".

Quite often depression lowers people's self-esteem to the point where they think they are unworthy of treatment. Given that depression is a treatable illness, but can kill if not treated, I think these people should be encouraged to seek help.

Most of the GPs at my surgery are just fucking rude.

They don't even look up from their computer screens half the time, when you enter the room, until they've well and truly finished typing.

A simple, "Hi. One moment please" seems to be beyond them.

I didn't go to see my GP for years as like you I couldn't think how that kind of conversation would go and I was embarrassed. I finally went to see my GP in October I had written down everything I wanted to say. He asked how he could help me and the flood gates opened I couldn't talk so gave him my piece of paper. It has honestly been one of the best choices I ever made. Only now I am taking medication for depression and having talking therapy do I realise how much I hadn't been coping.

I went to the GP when I couldn't sleep - probably because of stress. I said I was suffering from debilitating insomnia, she said "Here's a prescription for sleeping tablets" and that was the end of that.

I was definitely not expected to enter into any discussion of how I felt!

I went to my GP to tell him that I was having the darkest intrusive thoughts and they were terrifying me and I thought I was going mad.

I actually wrote it in bullet points and handed him the paper because I knew it would make me cry.

I've had the same GP since I was 11 and he hugged me and told me that we would sort it out together and not to worry. He knows my husband and our parents and our children. It wasn't awkward at all. Who else would I tell?

It took a total of 10 minutes and those 10 minutes changed my life. The GP mentioned counselling and medication.

It turned out to be caused by my contraception. I stopped taking it and within a month the cloud had lifted. I didn't need any further help.

I want all your GPs!

Ive seen 2 different doctors about anxiety & depression.( I have dc with disabilities)

They both made me feel like a total time waster.

I haven't bothered going back.

Your gp sounds fab happy. My gp did once ask me why my heart rate was high did I find it hostile there or was I taking cocaine then awkward silence and I backed out !

Um maybe I will give it another go one day!

Winnie my dd is at the moment In the middle of assessment for autism - it's really hard! I would love to be able to tell gp this but it just doesn't seem relevant somehow.

My dc were diagnosed years ago & the reality of csri5ng for them for the rest of my life is rather depressing pelicantown

You would be surprised how many patients ask their GP for help with an emotional or psychological problem in the last 30 seconds of a 10 minute consultation, having presented with an unrelated (or occasionally psychosomatically related) physical problem to start with. Most people feel awkward asking for help with something that traditionally seems more the vicar's remit than the doctor's. Although it's true there's a lot of armchair diagnosis on MN, I think it's good to normalise the idea of asking for professional help with unmanageable stress or distress, and a great shame that not all GPs are very good at responding to it.

I agree, OP. no matter whom i see , it's taken 3 weeks to see them. They are late to see me so are stressed and rushes. I always end up forgetting to tell them everything (even if had a list, which is unusual as i feel under pressure time wise and that it's off putting for them)
most are dismissive even if nice.
A lot of what's said is meant with a nod/ silence / or change subject. Because they are watching the clock and aware of how people are waiting in the waiting room often with fractious babies.

Winnie that's what I am starting to feel as well. For example she has done odd spots which I am told could be molluscum? But they are spreading and really I would like to take her to the gp BUT if we set foot in there she starts being violent , hiding under chairs and growling like a dog - which sounds ridiculous but it's really quite hard to cope with.

Reasons to go to your GP for abuse:
you may have injuries that need to be looked at/officially documented.
you are very likely to be stressed or anxious and may need counselling referral from GP or pills to take the edge off the anxiety to give you strength to leave.
GP may have access to keyworkers who could help you get away.

Depression - obvious reasons. It's a medical issue concerning a major organ of the body.

Relationship breakdown? Stress, insomnia, rapid weight loss or gain, depression.

Emotional life and physical health are closely linked.

I must be one of the luckiest people on mumsnet in regard to my GP.

I can always get an appointment if I follow the rules and actually have her email if I need an emergency. She asks me pertinent questions about me very long term condition and situation and remembers the details. She is always kind and sympathetic and knows that other than drugs there's not much more she can offer except her ear.

I try not to go too often and always feel mortified because I've been as long as half an hour. Yes, I do spill my feelings out because frankly, even your closest friends can't have quite the same experience and empathy as a really good GP.

God, I hope she never retires!

When I was 22 and 7st10lb (5'7") and struggling, I went to the GP and tried to talk about it because I thought I needed help. He told me his dog died the day before, I had no issues and to pull myself together. Was 1983 and I did pull myself together and in the next seven years only dipped under 7st8lb twice. I lived on the edge, I was successful and recovered physically and emotionally.

I still think he was a complete A Hole.

This thread makes me feel really sad. Gp's won't have all the answers but they are able to help you find relevant help and groups for mental health issues, addictions, abuse. I hope no one battling anxiety or struggling to deal with other equally difficult issues reads this and thinks oh well I better not go to the gp and waste their time. The reason you have a gp is so you see the sand doctor who knows you.

You can go and ask to be referred to a counselling service without giving your
Life story, although they will make you do the tick boxes test for depression. Our GP refers you onto a service called the wellbeing service if you were to go in saying you were struggling and needed support. They then meet you and connect you to specific services like counselling, mindfulness courses and various other similar things.

Nobody is saying don't go for depression but someone said recently that she keeps making an appt to 'chat' to her GP

This could just be clumsy phrasing. I have depression and anxiety issues and have to go to the gp every few months and it feels like just going for a chat quite often. Basically though she wants to know what's going on and if my medication needs adjusting. Sometimes I'm only in 2 minutes but I still have to go or they stop my repeat meds.

Yes,they do.
Sometimes spontaneously
Sometimes only after direct questioning
Sometimes accompanied by family or partner
Sometimes after someone else has made referral
Sometimes it's written as they can't articulate it,it's too painful

Everyone I know who went for depression already knew they had it. It often follows a sort of breakdown where they pour everything out to a friend or relative first.

Write your stuff down before you go in I can't speak when I'm upset or extremely stressed. I can just about manage to squeak out please will you read this. They always do.

I did and it saved my life.