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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to feel annoyed about this note left on my car?

38 replies

somedogsdo · 27/01/2017 19:32

Arriving back at the car park after swimming lessons with kids in tow, I find the following note attached to my windscreen:
'Thanks to your stupid parking, I couldn't get my son in his car seat!'

Feeling really annoyed as, whilst I understand this person's frustration, I really wasn't parked that close - and was definitely well within the double white lines separating the parking bays.

I admit I wasn't centrally in the bay as the car to my left was slightly to one side (although again - still inside the bay) and I left room when parking so that I could open doors on both sides of my car. All got out with plenty of room (i.e. No squeezing/squashing).

Thinking back there probably wouldn't have been room to open the car doors to their full extent (i.e. 90 degrees) but definitely enough room to get out comfortably (and I'm curvy girl so need a bit of room myself!)

Now, I've been in the other driver's position myself - struggling with getting child in seat and not being able to open door fully for easy access. I'm a big fan of the extra large baby/child spaces that enable you to do this. But I wouldn't blame the driver of the next vehicle unless they had parked really close and outside of their own parking bay. So I was quite shocked and annoyed to have that note left on my car when it was parked inside all lines of the parking bay (and I mean inside, ie not touching any of the white lines - which are double lines between spaces to allow a little extra room between spaces)

I'm probably just being over sensitive as have stinking cold and feeling bit fragile today.

I wondered if the driver thought I should have parked in another space entirely? But it was dark when we arrived so I wouldn't have even realised they had child seats - and to be fair, most people in the car park do as we're all taking our kids swimming. (Mine are in boosters now so I don't need the strap-in variety.) The car park was about 2/3rds full so I suppose I could have used another space. But we were late so I just picked a space close to the pool, parked in it, got kids/swim stuff out both sides with no problems, dashed in and was faced with the 'your stupid parking' note when we got back.

Should I have been more observant and left the space free? I don't like the idea that I've caused somebody a problem but am equally feeling annoyed as it feels rather unjustified.

What do you think?

OP posts:
olympicsrock · 27/01/2017 19:34

Let it go! Don't sweat the small stuff.

unicornsIlovethem · 27/01/2017 19:35

Ignore ignore ignore. They were just having a whinge. Their bad day is not your problem.

Reality16 · 27/01/2017 19:35

I think you have wasted far too much energy on it already! That's some size of a post for something you can't change. If I came back to a note like that I would screw it up and forget about it!

SoleBizzz · 27/01/2017 19:35

Forget it! Modern life!

ShowMePotatoSalad · 27/01/2017 19:36

She couldn't get her son in the car seat? So what did she do then? Not put him in the car seat?

What actually happened, we can presume, is that she did get her son in the car seat. It just wasn't the easiest thing to do.

Every time I have taken my son out in the car and we get him in or out, if there is a car parked next to us then we can't open the door fully. And it is a squeeze. But that's not anyone else's fault, that's just how it is.

Some people love stirring up trouble, OP. YANBU to be annoyed but I wouldn't dwell on it.

DeathStare · 27/01/2017 19:36

So a complete stranger (who was probably tired and stressed) made an unfair comment about your parking?

This is a non-issue. Let it go.

kilmuir · 27/01/2017 19:37

You were in the lines.
Tough titty you were doing nothing wrong

ParadiseCity · 27/01/2017 19:38

Some nobber probably parked craply and got a note which they then moved onto your car. Ignore it!

OptimisticSix · 27/01/2017 19:39

Don't worry about it. I had a similar note once, said my parking was so bad they would have needed a can opener to get in the side closest to me... like you I was well within the lines and car park spaces do tend to be small and I only had a micra so it wasn't like I was filling it... I was a bit irked by it at the time but now it just makes me smile to think they went to all that trouble to tell me off for using a parking space.

Original poster
somedogsdo · 27/01/2017 19:42

Thanks all - you're completely right that I'm dwelling on this far more than I need to. Sorry just having a super sensitive day! It nearly made me cry - how pathetic is that! Blush

OP posts:
MalletsMallets · 27/01/2017 19:42

The problem with shit like this is you have no right to reply.
"Well actually i had to park like this because of the car next to me"

It's the circle of shit days, they've had a shit day so pass it on to you, you in turn pass it on to someone else by beeping them, or having a go at your kids / partner and the cycle continues.

Break the cycle- easier said than done. But from what you've said, the bays just aren't big enough. Unless your the car park designer this isn't your fault

AmeliaJack · 27/01/2017 19:45

She was having a baaaad day. I'm sure your parking was fine.

Swimming lessons make everyone crazy! I can't imagine doing it with a small baby in tow.

sofiainwonderland · 27/01/2017 19:46

He couldn't put his son but he had time to leave a dickhead note.

As others said: don't sweat over the small stuffWink

Zaphodsotherhead · 27/01/2017 19:48

Not your fault - you were within the lines. Just someone annoyed and wanting to vent.

I once got a note on my car telling me that my dogs (who'd been left in the boot while I went into the shop to get water) had barked when they parked next to me and (and I quote) 'if I ever see those fuckers again I will rip their heads off'. Which was nice. Yes, the windows were cracked open, but if two huge dogs could squeeze through them, I would have called myself Derren Brown.

welcometowonderland · 27/01/2017 19:52

If the same car is there next week at swim lessons you could always say something if you see them.

Rainydayspending · 27/01/2017 19:53

Wow. Someone who couldn't problem solve (move the carseat to the other side for eg) really must have been having a shit day.

TheEmmaDilemma · 27/01/2017 19:56

Let it go.

Not long ago I parked in a small space in a small carpark and although I was in the lines I was to oneside. That was because the next had to do it because the car next to him which was a weird angle.

But the time I came back they'd both gone and I just looked like a parking twat. I laughed and moved on...

BattleaxeGalactica · 27/01/2017 19:59

So this wankbadger parked in the most popular part of the car park then expected everyone else to park in the wilds and leave him/her acres of open space to fling the car door around with wild abandon?

Fucking barking. Ignore.

londonrach · 27/01/2017 20:01

Dont worry. I once had a not put on my car legally parked in a road (no driveways, no yellow lines etc) near a hospital where my mum had been rushed in saying dont park it its not a hospital car park. I put said note through door of house i parked in front of (curtain was twitching) saying thanks i wont the reason i did is no more. Have a lovely day x (there were tear marks as i had been crying as mum just beaten cancer and broken something) she had just been transferred to another more specialist hospital nearer home. Since felt slightly mean but id parked on a public road at 12 am and got back to my car at 4am when she was transferred. Whos up at that time?

mambono5 · 27/01/2017 20:01

Just be grateful they didn't scratch your car instead of/as well as leaving you a note and forget about it.

Love51 · 27/01/2017 20:01

Top tip for that situation! I tell my eldest to get in on the accessible side, walk across to the tricky side, wind down the window and get in her seat. I then fasten her in through the open window, which she closes with her foot while I fasten little one in on the accessible side.
I felt like a genius the day I figured that out! Didn't want to climb in the back with them as little one would have got into mischief. Was my problem to solve, not another driver's.

Love51 · 27/01/2017 20:04

London Flowers
Not your situation, the note writer's.

elektrawoman · 27/01/2017 20:05

I agree, don't worry, they must have been stressed or have other stuff going on to get themselves so worked up to write that note. But I know what it's like, if you are a considerate person it's not nice to get notes like that. Most parking spaces are just not adequate for car seats so they really should have issue with the person who designed the car park!
When I was heavily pregnant I got back to my car to find I couldn't get into it because of the car parked next to it - probably a knock-on effect from other car being slightly over their space. If I hadn't been so pregnant it wouldn't have been an issue! I went into the shop and got them to ask on the tannoy whose car it was and the lady was quite apologetic and moved it. It didn't occur to me to have a rant at her, what would that have achieved?

Chill out, it's Friday night, forget. about the grumpy people Flowers

Megatherium · 27/01/2017 20:05

It's an infuriatingly illogical note. It assumes you should have looked at the car in the next bay, noted that there was a child seat, and decided to re-park on the off chance that they actually had a child with them and would need to come back to the car before you did. However, it doesn't take into account that, for instance, that if you parked further away, you might prevent the driver on the other side from getting a child in, or indeed from opening the door on that side at all.

I guess what would really irritate me about that is that it's the sort of thing that gives parents of small children a bad name - there's a real sense of entitlement in believing that everyone else must inconvenience themselves to avoid any inconvenience to parents and their little darlings.

ItsNiceItsDifferentItsUnusual · 27/01/2017 20:10

I agree, that note was hugely entitled. I can't remember the last time I was able to get ds in the car seat with ease, it's always a bloody squeeze. Just the way it is.

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