More baby name weirdness

[Tabbylady]

I was quietly thinking I was definitely BU until I saw the toby baby/dog thread and started thinking I may not be in the wrong... so thoughts would be welcome!

I am 20wk pregnant and it's a girl. We have 2 DS. I'm Scottish but theoretically mixed race via Indian gran though I look "white" (this is relevant) DH is Irish. We have 2 DS.

I have a friend who I made through work. She's british with pakistani heritage with a swedish DH. They recently moved to my village. We get on well but she has some odd ideas about culture etc. I wore a saree to an Indian friend's wedding and she got upset at me for "cultural appropriation", she defines herself as pakistani though parents were born in scotland etc. Tradition is important to her and that's fine.

DH and I always said that we'd call any DD a Scottish name we love (it's not Isla!) And give her the Irish name of his sister who sadly died in childhood as a middle name. Both are v unusual but go nicely and we may double barrel (think like anna-marie but not)

I have had the baby name chat with my friend a few times and she knows this.

This weekend she told me she's pg too! She told me if it's a girl she wants our Irish name. I said "oh but thats DH sis name" and she said ah yeah our other choice is our scottish name I was a bit too taken aback and just said "errrm" and then her DH came in and changed subject.

Now I know I can't own names but these are specific to us and I'm surprised by her - thought she would pick something pakistani or swedish, especially given her prev behaviour re culture.

Our kids will be in the same small class at school

AIBU to think this is a bit off? How do I approach her without seeming like I want ALL THE NAMES for myself?

One of my closest friends had a daughter 6 months after I had my daughter. She used the name that was my daughter's middle name - for example, my daughter is (not) called Amy Beth Jones, she called her daughter Beth.
Absolutely no problem. The name is an unusual one but I didn't mind her daughter having the name, we chose it because it has meaning to us, as did she.

I was pregnant six months before my friend. I had a boy and she used my girl name for her daughter. It is quite unusual and she hadn't thought of it before.

I was a bit miffed, but used another name when I had my own DD, but used my fave as middle name. She had the cheek to imply I was copying her.

She then had a second daughter and used my DD's name as her middle name . Totally bonkers. However our kids actually like sharing names so...whatever.

NEVER TELL ANYONE YOUR BABY NAME

This woman sounds odd. The baby name thing, the house move! Also on the basis you have Indian heritage why on earth is it appropriative to wear a sari?!?!?! I'm blonde and Arab and if someone told me it was appropriative to wear a keffiyeh I'd go nuts!!!!

I wish her husband the best explaining the Eabhla/Aoibheann/Doireann type Irish names to his family (aka where the spelling is nowhere near the pronunciation). I frequently threaten OH with potential names like Aodhan & Ailbhe just to wind him up!

I would bet than when the times comes she'll bail on the "unusual" name as I'd imagine half her family (& all of his) being a bit WTF??? Best of luck with your little one.

I would take no notice of this and name your child what you want. She is being weird. During my babyshower (my friends arranged it without my knowledge!) two of my friends had a lighthearted "argument" about who's baby would be called X. They had given me a list which included X, not knowing we had already decided on naming our son X. Haha :) So we "won", as neither of them were pregnant!

I would distance myself a little from her. I know that no one owns a name but using an unusual name that you know a friend wants to use because it has particular significance is just a bit odd.

Make up something really obscure and say you have had a change of heart and she is welcome to the name!!
We told everyone our ds was going to be Oleg off the adverts - stopped the speculation and suggestions.

Thanks for all your thoughts! stella23 that's a really good point- quite a few people know our Irish choice as they know about DH sister but since we've told her now we may as well bang on about the other one too.

I am going to a meeting at work with her tomorrow and we'll be travelling together on the train so I might try and bring it up then.

DH has now pointed out that she has also been on two similar but fancier holidays to us in the last couple of years, and recently upgraded her car to the next model up from mine. He means it in jest... but maybe baby names is just the start of my presence in a real life Single White Female (set in drizzly Scotland)

Repeats to self: it's just the pregnancy hormones it's just the pregnancy hormones