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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

In wanting to throttle my dh when he snores?

40 replies

PrettyCandles · 24/02/2007 21:20

What is it about snoring that is so utterly unbearable? Are men as bothered by hearing a room-/bed-mate snoring as women are? And why is it almost as bad to have to listen to dh snoring away beside me when I have to stay awake in any case, as it is when I'm trying to get to sleep?

OP posts:

Flossam · 24/02/2007 21:22

Mine complained of a sore back this morning. That would be where I was jabbing him!! If I am feeling reasonable I try and use the snores to lull (haha) myself off to sleep. However, mostly atm I am grumpy and hate being woken and DP bears the brunt.

Budababe · 24/02/2007 21:24

Have rearranged sleeping arrangements here. DS (5) sleeps with me and DH is in spare room. No problems. Can't see myselft changing it anytime soon!

CanSleepWontStarve · 24/02/2007 21:26

Not unreasonable at all. I only have to put up with it 3 or 4 nights a week, and that is more than enough! He's started using snore stop spray, but even that didn't work last night.

prawnsmum · 24/02/2007 21:27

No my DH drives me insane with his snoring sometimes he even has to sleep on the sofa!!

SenoraPostrophe · 24/02/2007 21:27

I just poke mine and make him roll over if he snores. I don't think woemn normally snore as loudly do they?

Original poster

PrettyCandles · 24/02/2007 21:30

While I was feeding ds2 last night, dh woke with a huge start and yelped out "There was no need to poke me with your elbow!". Stared at me accusingly, then turned over in a huff and went back to sleep. For once in a way he hadn't been snoring, and I hadn't touched him! I wasn't even near him! I PMSL . Oh if only he really was so well-trained, and turned over when he snored without having to be poked viciously first.

We do occasionally take a holiday from each other, and one of us (or, in my case, two of us) go off to the spare room. But that's sometimes worse - at least if I'm in the same bed as him I can thump him and make him turn over.

OP posts:

uptomyeyes · 24/02/2007 21:32

I know that feeling, I went past prodding, poking, pushing and kicking to putting a pillow (gently) over dh's face just to dull the resonance of his snoring. It did the trick. Major contributors are smoking and drinking. When it gets really bad I wake him up and send him to the spare room. So I get the kingsize bed to myself - BLISS

prawnsmum · 24/02/2007 21:33

thats true prettycandles i've found myself going downstairs to shut him up because I can still hear him at least if hes beside me I can kick him

pregnabrain · 24/02/2007 21:39

I'm so happy someone's started this thread! My husband's snoring never bothered me until I had dd. Now, sleep is the most precious thing in the world to me. I can just about take being woken in the night by a small child in need of attention, but to then return to bed to find the entire room vibrating with the happy sleep sounds of someone WHO HASN'T HAD TO WAKE UP. Well, it's enough to drive anyone to murder, isn't it?

[exhales]

berolina · 24/02/2007 21:41

I seem to have developed an early warning system that interrupts my sleep when dh so much as turns into a position in which he is likely to snore. That's how much I hate it. (I prod him gently and he shifts reluctantly over again )

BandofMothers · 24/02/2007 21:41

I agree, it pi**es me off when I sit feeding and he's lying there snoring like a pig!!!
Had to poke him awake to go in to dd1 (3) cos she woke up while I was feeding. Took a good 4/5 hard pokes and a shake.
TUT

foxybrown · 24/02/2007 21:42

Oh God! We have a huge problem with this. We rarely go to bed together now and its ruining our relationship. He's been diagnosed with sleep aponea (sp) and wears a type of gum shield, which really helps sometimes, if he's not stressed, too tired or been drinking. Otherwise one of us has to leave. The bed, I mean. He's been to the doctors, hospital, is due an operation on his nose, but I'm not holding much hope. Its a real problem.

BandofMothers · 24/02/2007 21:44

Always worse when beer is involved.
Stops if he sleeps on his front though so not so bad.

Saggarmakersbottomknocker · 24/02/2007 21:48

No PrettyCandles you're not alone. I am sorely tempted to smother my dh with a pillow some nights.

He is only silent when lying on his right side so he gets elbowed several times a night. I hiss at him to turn over and he mutters 'will do' then stays exactly where he is and starts snoring again.

The worst nights are the ones when he snores loudly and then just stops - no breathing at all for several seconds. I'm pleased he's quiet for a moment then I'm willing him to take a breath!!

melsy · 24/02/2007 21:53

I could have written every single one of these posts. I dread that coming back to room at 3-4am afterfeed time to the vibration of bed. makes me go flippin mental, I then start to resent him sleeping. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

foxybrown · 24/02/2007 21:55

That's what diagnosed the sleep aponea! I'd end up counting, waiting for his next breath! He wasn't getting any good quality of sleep, I wasn't, we had babies... bad, bad receipe.
I am SO relieved its not just me getting SO angry. I know its not his fault, its not as if its deliberate, but it makes my blood boil!

TeetheCeeofDavedom · 24/02/2007 22:00

Poking my dp only works for a second.

I hate the waking for a wee or becasue he left him lamp on and it always, always wakes me at some stage if left on.
He snores, I poke (or punch, whatever!) and it stops, I do panic trying to get to sleep before it starts again and never do! Eventually I must doze off after lying htere punching the duvet and crying 'it's not fair, it's just not fair' and thrashing around being annoyed and frustrated for about 20 minutes!

Bozza · 24/02/2007 22:02

Now I can see the other side of this because I snore. But have only started doing so in the last two years. Not that DH is an angel but generally he can be nudged off his back. He is worse when he has been drinking but that is hardly ever anyway. But I snore not on my back. I really can't understand why it has started. I have started using some strips that you put on the roof of your mouth from Boots and these work but not for all night always. I wonder if it is because I have put some weight on but I am not huge - size 10/12 rather than 8/10.

Bozza · 24/02/2007 22:04

DH gets up for the loo and that annoys me. Also when the children wake up (not that often these days) I get up and soothe them, get back into bed and start settling down and 30 secs later he gets up and goes to the loo. Argh. If you were going to get up anyway why didn't you go to DD, all she needs is her covers putting back on?

foxybrown · 24/02/2007 22:05

must confess, I think i woke myself up the other night, blamed him and made him leave the bed... oops. but i still don't do it as loudly as him!

Saggarmakersbottomknocker · 24/02/2007 22:08

Foxy - I've told dh to speak to the GP about it. He had a 24 hour BP monitor on last week - his BP is up but she commented that his heart rate is low when he's asleep - lowest was 37bpm - and there's a connection between bradycardia, sleep apnoea and high BP.

foxybrown · 24/02/2007 22:15

whats bradycardia?

Saggarmakersbottomknocker · 24/02/2007 22:17

Sorry - slow heart rate.

Where did your dh/dp get his gum shield thingy?

pregnabrain · 24/02/2007 22:18

Oh lordy. He's already snoring and I can hear it from the living room downstairs!

foxybrown · 24/02/2007 22:29

www.sleeppro.com - there are 2 sorts, one thats standard and another 'made to measure' - I'd go for the cheaper option to give it a try. Someone did say they sell them in Boots, but I've not seen them. Def. recommend.

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