To have got the wipes out??

[Clotho]

Just fallen out with DM over this..
Short story: sat on train on way home next to DM at one of the table seats. We were both being highly antisocial and on our phones. The train was pretty full, some chap sat down opposite me (also on his phone with headphones). Then he sneezes, without covering his mouth and I feel it land all over my hand, side of face and phone! I was totally grossed out and got out my anti-bac wipes (toddler at home -they go everywhere) I wiped my face, hands, phone and the table in front of me. (And shot a disgusted look at said bloke). DM meanwhile is muttering about ME being rude and embarrassing!

Massive row ensues in car, once off train (I can't help it sometimes, 37 and she still baits me). I reckon she's being ridiculous, she reckons wiping it all up is rude and embarrassing..... WIBU to clean up in the train??

So your advice would be sit there covered in snot/saliva?

Gosh no, you couldn't sit there with a random man's snot dripping from your hand just so as not to offend him.
That would be politeness gone mad.

He was the one out of order for not sneezing into his sleeve if he couldn't get a handkerchief to his face in time. We are in the middle of a serious flu epidemic here in France (not sure if you've got it over there as badly) and everyone is being constantly reminded to cover their mouth / nose when they sneeze or cough. Just as well that you had the wherewithall about you to clean yourself up - he should have been ashamed of himself and if your mother wanted to scold an adult then he is the one she should have taken to task.

YANBU at all.

Figure I think I might be with your mum. In order to avoid embarrassing anyone (which is what most manners are about) I'd have pretended not to notice I was covered in snot.

Surely he broke the unofficial good manners "contract" by sneezing over her? A bit like you wouldn't punch someone in the street but you might if they attacked you first...

I don't blame you - I would have done the same (although I don't carry wipes with me.)

Disgusting - I'd've wiped myself then given him the used wipe - his snot after all.

Thanks all, feel a bit vindicated.
The bloke didn't apologise or look in the slightest embarrassed for those who asked.
Also (sadly DM has rubbed off on me a bit) I am not a song and dance person. I quietly wiped everything down and 'the look' was basically me looking slightly disgusted at him to see if he'd say anything. DM didn't know I'd shot a look- suspect she might have spontaneously combusted if she had.
We'll get over the row by tomorrow, just feeling a bit like this is manners gone mad!

I would have done exactly the same - his behaviour was horrid. I even wipe down the table, seat arms as soon as I board train or plane so this would have definitely deserved an extra wipe (or two).

I would have done the same thing.

What a jerk!

And your DM is ridiculous for expecting you to sit there covered in someone else's snot and germs. Ewwwww.

YANBU for wiping yourself BUT to not get a cold/flu you would need anti viral wipes, not anti-bacterial.

Anti-bacs will do nothing against that snot...

YANBU

That's disgusting.

Utterly vile.

YANBU, I'm imagining you quickly wiped yourself and the table off and didn't go with the over dramatic tuts and huffing that other posters are assuming happened. If someone is oblivious enough to spray other people with snot without profuse apologies (because we all know sometimes snot happens with little warning) they probably won't notice an angry look either.

The dirty bastard!
He could have least have apologised.

Based on your last post, ywnbu at all.

I'm absolutely disgusting hygiene wise by Mumsnet standards but I think there was nothing wrong with your reaction and the correct reaction from sneezing bloke should have been nothing less than absolute mortification and a grovelling apology. How he had the gall to not make any attempt to cover his nose or not be bothered at all, I have no idea.

Ha, my mother would have wiped the man down too, and then given him a thorough spraying with tea-tree oil solution. And then probably try to boil the train carriage for good measure!

YANBU, he was gross.

Eewwwwww YADNBU