AIBU to ask for this surgery?

[purplepansyem]

I've had an Ileostomy for almost 14 years (for those of you who don't know what that is, think colostomy bag). When I had it done I was morbidly obese (almost 22st) and I had a large but smooth stomach. After a couple of years, I developed a parastomal hernia almost directly under my stoma. I had a few leaks but managed to find alternative medical appliances to use which solved the problem. In August 2014, I had gastric surgery to enable me to lose weight. I lost approx 9st and although my stomach shrank and became baggy, the hernia kept the area beneath the stoma smooth so no further leaks occured. Then, in July 2015, my hernia strangulated and I had to have emergency surgery. The Surgeons fixed the hernia which caused my stomach to deflate beneath the stoma and I began to have leakage problems. Since July my life has been very stressful because I am having on average between 1-4 leaks a day. My husband has been sleeping on the sofa because I have leaked fecal matter on him. I've leaked in the supermarket, out with friends, during the night, in a club etc, etc. When I say leak, I'm talking anything between a slight leak to a full on leak which comes through my knickers, jeans, top and all over the inside of my coat. I leaked at my brothers dinner table and once, rushed to my friends bathroom but leaked all up her stair carpet. I've seen a general surgeon, stoma nurses and my GP and they've all said the same thing, that re-sighting the stoma won't fix the problem and the only solution is to create a smoother, flatter stomach. But this means asking for a tummy tuck or apronectomy which is classed as plastic surgery. I am seeing an NHS plastic surgeon on Monday and I am going to have to beg and plead for this surgery and because of the funding issues etc, there is little chance I can have it. AIBU to think I should be eligible for this surgery without having to beg for it? I pay my stamp and I'm not asking for it for cosmetic reasons. My life is a misery and my skin is very sore because of constant leaks. What do you think? (please be gentle, as I'm feeling rather stressed and vulnerable at the moment).

You may not need to beg and plead as you need it for a medical reason, so your GP should refer you.

I don't think this comes under the category of cosmetic does it? It shouldn't.

It may be easier than you think.

My mother had breast reduction on the NHS, no pleading, she didn't even have to ask twice.
THe consultant immediately agreed and she had surgery within 3 months.

Hi everyone, I thought I'd posted a message yesterday but I don't see it so I'll re-post now.

Firstly, thank you all for your messages and replies. I've read them all with great interest.

I saw the consultant yesterday and after examining me, he said that surgery, although possible, is the last thing he wants to do!

He feels that I am at high risk for post op infection because A: there is bacteria around my stoma and B: I have a small wound along my scar line from the hernia repair in July that also has bacteria on it (I am currently taking two courses of antibiotics for this)

These two factors mean that the operating theater will not be a sterile environment.

Now, I have to say, I don't totally understand this as I had the stoma during the hernia repair. They also had to re-section a portion of my small intestine during that operation and I had no post op infection problems.

He wants me to try a product called Friars Balsam. It makes the skin very sticky and he believes it will enable my stoma flange to stick firmly to my stomach and not come unstuck, therefore fixing the leakage problems.

I have told him I will try this and bought a bottle on the way home.

If I do decide to have surgery, he wants me to lose weight - approximately 1-2st because my BMI is 31 and he wants it in the 20's.

He explained that if the layer of fat in my abdomen is too thick, the operation will not cure the wobbly skin and will therefore not cure the leakage problem.

He believes this weight loss will take 6 months so he doesn't want to see me until then unless I lose the weight quicker.

I also have to see a dietitian for help with the weight loss and he wants my bariatric surgeon to see me as he said he will need to be in the surgery to re-site the stoma during the operation.

So my goals are to see if the Friars Balsam works and also start a diet because regardless of weather I have the surgery or not, I want and need to lose some weight.

I also need to get the wound healed up.

Ok, not the ringing endorsement you had maybe been looking for, but still, sounds like a plan.

I do agree with the weight loss: being a bit leaner will have many advantages. A better cosmetic and functional result, lesser intraoperative risks, better recovery.

Good luck with the Friar's Balsam - I have never heard of it.