Biscuit police -AIBU?

[Supermagicsmile]

There is no rule on buying biscuits, if the team are gifted any we put them out in the staff room and all enjoy them.

One woman at work had taken it upon herself to monitor and ration the biscuits/sweets as she sees fit.

Yesterday we were given a box of chocolates. I was looking forward to having one but they were not in the staffroom. I was told X had put them away because we already had some biscuits out (they were the dregs of a Christmas box that no-one wanted to eat.)

She will often appear at random times with a new box of sweets/chocolates that were donated and she was keeping 'safe.'

I also noticed that at the end of our break last week she took the whole box of biscuits with her to stop anyone eating them when it wasn't our collective break time (we don't all have breaks together everyday so feel this is unfair as when we are in the staffroom there is often nothing to eat at all.) she has not bought any of these herself so has no more 'claim' on them than anyone else.

Aibu to think it should not be up to her what we eat and when?

You're weird

We have some in the cupboard from when I had a minor op in 1986 (so they will be only be bout 30 years out of date - I can't imagine they will taste any worse than usual). I'll dig them out for you.

Oh! There's some of those crystallised orange and lemon slices . . .do you want those as well?

Can I tell a story?

When I was an office junior we had a standard issue stationary cupboard monitor. She had a little book and wrote down who got what when (noni 23/01 1 X blue biro 14p). There were rules and regulations and of course it was impossible to anticipate. I was not senior enough for a red biro.

On her fina day before annual leave she send an email explaining that in her absence the senior partner would have the stationary authority.

Next day I started my round of gathering the paper from the printers to fill the photocopier and then spread a single ream amongst the printers. Obviously the rest of the day was spent running round with sheets of paper.

I asked the senior partner the book and started making appropriate speech. He looked at me, then the book, then said he had never heard the word ream so many times in a sentence (on reflection he was prob making a joke)

Long story short he gave me full authority over the cupboard and the ordering. Then told everyone they could spend £50 a year!

You cannot imagine her face when she walked in to see stacks of paper beside the photocopier and then pots of pens on people's desk.

I think office rebellion is healthy. Honestly that fortnight was one of my work life highlights.

Love they story.

.

I was not senior enough for a red biro

Did you ever reach those giddy heights, Noni?

Brilliant story, BTW!

happy at that job I did not reach those giddy heights. I do however use the story at interviews of an example of when I creatively solved a problem (problem being printers without paper not the stationary police problem)

I was telling the story to DP who pointed out for Christmas everyone bought me pens and maybe, just maybe, that job was the source of my stationary problem.

How have things been so far this week OP? Any more biccys going 'missing'??

None missing but none out either.

I am going to put a few packs out and see what happens.

When she removes the packets you take in, it;ll give you a chance to confront her and "have it out" Silly woman she is, pushing her own issues about food onto others.

Has this been solved yet?

Suggest a Biscuit Monitor Rota

Yes, have a rota. The biscuit monitor not only looks after the hallowed tin, but updates the biscuit spreadsheet with amounts donated and bought, donor, flavour, number. And crosses off biscuits eaten, with a note indicating who ate how many.

She's off sick so we currently have no biscuits. I don't know where she keeps them!

The biscuit monitor not only looks after the hallowed tin, but updates the biscuit spreadsheet with amounts donated and bought, donor, flavour, number. And crosses off biscuits eaten, with a note indicating who ate how many.

I like your suggestions Pax.

But I would add that there may need to be a "biscuit exchange rate".

1 chocolate hob-nob is the equivalent of three custard creams, but equal to a jaffa cake.

1 ginger nut = 2 garibaldi

2 digestives = 3 rich tea

Anything with cream in it counts double (except bourbons - see below)

Shortcake trumps everything!

Bourbons are filth. Anyone who provides bourbons for office consumption needs to be publicly flogged and branded with a Biscuit Mark Of Shame (perhaps the patterning of the Dreaded Bourbon, seared into the flesh of their forehead? That's not too extreme, is it? )

She's off sick so we currently have no biscuits.

She's not suffering from a "surfeit of biscuits" is she, Magic.

It is a proven scientific fact* that overindulgence in Fox's Crinkle Crunh can bring on apoplexy.

*I imagine. (Nearly typed "wink" there - now that would be an emoticon to boggle one's mind! )

This autocorrect ruins my life

It should say "Nearly typed 'wank' " Bloody thing publicly humiliates and ruins my jokes . . . I hate it]

You are a sick puppy Sexlube

A very sick puppy . . .

I suggest you wear your "Biscuit Mark Of Shame" with pride - you have suffered for what you love ...

But a biscuit tin, take it to work full of biscuits, attach cutesy sign with forever friends hedgehog saying COMMUNAL BISCUITS DO NOT REMOVE await for her to return!

If she's off sick I'd take the opportunity to bring loads of biscuits in. Get everyone to join in. Imagine her face if she gets back and there are unmonitored biscuits everywhere!

Coffee

Inspired!

I like it... a biscuit orgy in the staff room.
It will tip biscuit monitor over the edge