To tell the young lad on my train to put headphones on

[questioningitall]

Or turn his fucking music off?

Nope.

He looks a bit .... like he would bash my head in for asking. Busy carriage and No one else is saying anything.

I would, but then I am bolshy like that.

Start a nice chat with him about his taste in music. Mention some of your favourites and ask if he has any of their tracks. Possibly hum along too. That'll either shut him up, or you'll end up actually having a nice chat.

(Disclaimer: I wouldn't actually do this myself, I'm far too British. I'd quietly seethe, and possibly tut if pushed.)

I have said something in the past. I'm bolshy gobby too

Commuter train and a lad around 19 had some of those big ear phones only they weren't on his head he had them around his neck with the tinny music blaring.
I managed 5 minutes before I leaned over and said "you do know those things work better if you actually put them on and then the rest of the train don't have to listen to your music. Wearing them like that does not make you look cool it makes you look like you are too thick to know how to use them properly".
In his defence he looked embarrassed and put them on correctly.

I would and have, recently on a loonng train journey. He looked duly chastened and turned whatever he was watching off, but did try to argue the toss that it 'wasn't anything annoying'. He did sigh and sulk behind me for the rest of the journey though

Entitled and selfish behaviour deserves pulling up whenever possible IMO.

I did once give a sniffer a tissue so he could blow his nose. To his credit, he did so with good grace. Humour on both sides helped.

Does my head in , ,YANBU

lol , I would be inclined to react how pidgyfinder General would

With age in my case comes bolshiness.

They are selfish people and there are many these days.

So bold works when I don't wish it too and when I want it too it don't .?

Can you all start singing and humming along - out of tune of course, perhaps get a middle aged man to do some dad dancing?

Play some classical music or Bing Crosby (assuming those aren't similar to his taste!) on your phone.

I'd probably sit there and seethe too. Hope your journey isn't too long?

There's a guy who comes into our local pub sometimes who sits there with his headphones on listening to music/watching music videos on his iPad. All fine and good. But he insists on joining in singing the song too. We have no idea what he's singing though

Just ask him politely, the same way you would if he were not a young lad but a 40 year old woman... On a busy train what is the worst that will happen? He might snarl and decline. More likely he will either do as you ask or make an excuse. Teens are usually really polite and obliging if you speak to them politely in the first place.

I don't like it when two commuters know eachother and chat. It's morning. Shhh.

All in the same realm but I'm not really allowed to tell people to generally shut up....

having music as an excuse to shush people is a blessing.

My daughter just sings along badly when people do this near her. She's only 9 so being self conscious hasn't occurred to her yet but it always works in getting headphones placed firmly in place and in use

I will confess to not being brave enough to do this myself though

If he's alone I'd say something. He's unlikely to kill you if he's alone.

If he's with a group of equally antisocial "youths" then I'd probably rather seethe than take the abuse that would follow.

To whoever said what's the worse that can happen on a busy train... My friends and I were robbed at knifepoint on a fairly busy train when we were teens. Nobody helped us, they were just glad it wasn't them.

Some man told me to turn my podcast down once. He was really arsey about it but in reality I just didn't realise how shit my headphones were. I could hear all the train noises at full volume but unfortunately everyone else could also hear Adam and Joe . I was happy to turn it down but he didn't need to be such a knob.

I don't understand why anyone would not bring headphones if they plan to listen to music. Such arrogance to assume or not care that you're disturbing others.

I feel your pain. Next door have builders in, this is the first week of many. They have, sensibly, moved out. Their radio is louder in here than I'd have mine on 😬 I can cope, sound travels oddly & they're working...all good plus it's a mainstream radio station with ok music what I'm struggling with is one bloke who can't hold a tune let alone find a single correct note. It's agony. But slightly preferable to his random shouting (not work stuff, just random shite). I'm debating whether to give him singing lessons or a just gaffa tape his mouth shut daily...

Yes, I could go and 'ask him nicely to STFU'
Yes, I could phone the neighbours
Etc etc
Right now I'm practising tolerance - let's see how long it lasts 😁

Plus the other neighbour has NO tolerance of ANYTHING so he's likely to get it sorted 😂

Sing along. Then throw some shapes.

I've done it before. Packed commuter train, nobody saying anything. I said something like, 'do you think you could listen to that through headphones instead?'. He said 'nobody else is bothered', then turned up the music and said, 'now look what you've made me do'. I was so angry and embarrassed, and nobody else said a word. 😡

RachelRagged

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Thank You blankmind

When I used to commute I was always asking people politely to turn their music down. I think part of the problem was then the crappy free ear phones you got with ipods and iPhone - they really leaked the sound badly.

I'd sing along. I cant hold a tune to save my life.

I use my 'looks nice a nice lady advantage' . I go and sit near them and tell them brightly that they may not be aware, but I can hear their music ALL the way down the other end of the carriage. They wouldn't mind using the headphones, would they? I would really appreciate it! They usually look a bit startled but comply.

I tend not to bother if it's just a 15min bus journey though. Also, I have had a group of teenagers turn on me when I told them off for chucking stuff. Full bus, no-one did anything the losers. Doesn't stop me asking people to turn it down though...