To ask my ex if dd can use his address

[eveteen]

DD will likely be going to university this year. I earn a fair salary but DH's salary is such that it would mean that it takes us out of the likely bracket for any financial support for when she is studying. My ex and his wife earn much less and would certainly qualify. I want to ask him to allow Dd to use his address on grant applications . She has a bedroom at both addresses and spends time at both. I fully intend to pay what I can but don't think it's fair to expect Dh to support her . Ex has low income but is financially secure but is also tight as a ducks bum. I know he will pay some towards her costs but we both have sc and other expenses. I don't want to discuss with either ex or dh until I have thought it through.

She has four parents and you still want someone else to pay for her?

I'd have thought even if she legitimately lived with her father then your income as her mother would still be taken into account.

the system is flawed because the two people who are funding the university don't live together and would qualify. As the system doesn't account for this, I don't see a moral problem.

To a PP who suggested the daughter get a job - it isn't always that simple. Some universities prohibit it in term time

I thought it was only Oxford and Cambridge who insisted on this? Every student I know, including my own DC, has had a job at uni.

Rhonda - I'm only aware of Oxford and Cambridge so you may be right

I didn't realise term time work had been banned at Oxford - pretty poor if so! I worked throughout my time at Oxford (as did many others) after the first two terms of first year, both term time and holidays, in various (comparatively well paid) part jobs available in college. The money that you could make during holidays (especially as you were provided with free accommodation and food) was very substantial, particularly taking into account the length of holidays.

I'd absolutely register her from her dad's address. But George Osborne cut the means-tested grant so there is just a bigger loan available to poorer students - I would take it and put money aside for a house deposit if you can afford to. Agree she should get a job.

I'd absolutely register her from her dad's address. But George Osborne cut the means-tested grant so there is just a bigger loan available to poorer students - I would take it and put money aside for a house deposit if you can afford to. Agree she should get a job.

Keekaw I think that would be part of a long term plan. I would still contribute to her costs but do feel that a loan to the highest amount she can get makes better financial sense in the long run. I want her to recognise that going to uni will run up debts that she is responsible for however with all our 4 children we have a plan to help out with deposits for first homes etc. To pay her full uni costs would affect my ability to do that . I kind of see the student loan as a tax rather than a 'proper loan'. I am not trying to be dishonest but want to explore best long term financial options🤓