To ask what your school age child eats?

[Mangomohito]

I'm ordering in terms of the timings of meals, breakfast, lunch, dinner, pudding (every day?). Snacks, what do they have after school.

Are they a healthy weight? Do you tend to have sweet foods in the house?

Please be honest, my 8 year old has always been very sugar obsessed. If he hasn't got access to sugary treats he turns to other foods I try to steer him towards healthier foods.

It might help me to get an insight into others how I could maybe tweak things a bit.

My 8 year old eats at mealtimes what I make for him, which is what I feed the rest of the family. I'd call him an average eater, sometimes not much and sometimes more, but never a big eater.

Breakfasts vary, but I try to give a complex carb, a protein, someting with calcium, and something with fibre. Today it was rye bread with cream cheese and smoked salmon, half a pear, a glass of milk. Yesterday it was a baked apple with Greek yoghurt and granola topping. Monday it was baked porridge with pear.

He has school lunches.

Dinner also are varied - I try to stick to 2 days meat, 2 days fish, 2 days veggie, and one day anything goes. Home cooked with minimally processed foods and stick to complex carbs. His preferences are pasta, pizzza, sushi, fish, and, not kidding, calves liver. Dislikes slimy textured foods (cooked spinach and most mushrooms). Puddings are usually saved for weekends, but the option of fruit is always available. I love to bake so there is always something on the weekends - chocolate fondants, pies, cakes, tarts. Only water to drink during the week with meals and more lenient when out or special occasions.

I don't give snacks for a regular school day, but throw in a fruity oatbar or a pack of coconut if he has a club. For home snacks, I have jars of nuts, a fruit bowl, packs of dried seaweed, crackers, and occasionally biscuits which they can access when they want, except if it is right before a meal.

A glass of milk with the more than occasional small biscuit before bed.

He is thinner than average, taller than average, and fairly active (walk to school and swims 3 times a week).

Why is this in AIBU?

Ds (7 & 11) had yesterday:
B: 2 weetabix with honey & raisins then 1 multigrain toast with peanut butter
L: egg mayo & rocket wrap, satsuma, frube squeeze yogurt & leftover chicken drumstick (but sometimes crisps, popcorn, quorn scotch eggs, etc)
D: fish pie with broccoli then tinned peaches in juice with ice cream.
Both had a snack after school piece of fruit, some peanuts and a crumpet with marmite (sometimes jam/honey).

They eat much the same but ds1 tends to have bigger portions or an extra snack after school. Both average weight, reasonably fit & sporty, quite lean.

I have DD1 who is 6 her typical day of food:

Breakfast consists of one of these: banana and soya yoghurt, two slices of toast with honey, butter or peanut butter, bowl of porridge with honey, bowl of cereal.

Playtime snack one of these: packet crisps, couple of biscuits, fruit roll, lolly, small pack of haribo's, small mix up of jelly type sweets, fruit or dairy free cereal bar.

Lunch is anything from: packed lunch with a sandwich (2 slices bread) piece of fruit and lolly or biscuit or fruit bar, cooked meal at school with pudding which is usually sorbet, soup from school again with pudding, baked potato and ham from school with pudding.

Snack after school anything from these: handful of nuts, crisps, couple of biscuits, fruit roll, fruit or dairy free cereal bar, piece of fruit.
Dinner: always a cooked meal and very varied from soup and sandwiches to homemade stews, pasta, roast dinners etc. She would usually have a pudding after this as well something like a small pack of haribo, dairy free dessert pot, piece of cake with dairy free custard or whatever else she fancies as long as she's eaten dinner.

She'll sometimes have a piece of fruit or veg before bed as well.

DD1 is of slim build and although she isn't what I'd call the most active child ever she walks to school most mornings and does a dance class and swimming lessons once a week. She's never been over or underweight and I've never stressed too much about what she eats as long as she's not stuffed full of sweets and is eating her meals.

I also have DD2 who is 1 and she eats very similar apart from her lunches mainly consist of homemade soup, pasta or sandwiches as she's at home with me. Again her weight is perfect and I've never had any issues with her.

Mango, you posted as I was typing up my post. Sound like you are doing your best at home but just have a child with an extreme sweet tooth. Unfortunately, if you limit his consumption of sugar too rigidly, you risk it becoming a bigger issue so trying to find the right balance between limiting sugar whilst not being draconian is the elusive goal.

I don't think he eats the sugary snacks because he is hungry so increasing protein won't really stop him. Perhaps switching the sweet things you have might be one option, at least at home. Home made is easier in this aspect because you can substitute ingredients like muffins made with masked bananas and dates to sweeten. When you do make a batch of anything, just portion out one serving for all and quickly put the rest in the freezer - not only will you have cakes/muffins/biscuits for another time without baking, but you will make the sweet item unavailable for an impulsive scoff. Another idea is to bake with your son. Not only is this potentially fun (I say potentially because the mess created makes it less fun for the adult), but it will force him to delay eating the sugary treat until baked and cooled.

Outside the home is the tricky bit - you can try and talk to grandparents about your concerns, but might just have to either let go during those occasions and/or limit their frequency.

5 and 7 here (also not in UK so finished eating for the day)

Breakfast : boepwl of cereal or 2 slices of toast, usually with Marmite, sometimes jam or honey.
Lunch:, packed lunch: ham sandwich (2 slices of bread) and vegetable sticks, fruit (half an apples and grapes today), yoghurt for DS1, cheese string for DS2, cereal bar.
Snack when back from school - usually homemade cake or biscuits, fruit juice. Today was cheese and raisins tho.
Dinner : more rice than me, with beef and vegetables (I had more beef and veg). They didn't ask for pudding.

DS1 is skinny by current standards, but fairly normal (trousers are hard to find with a small enough waist). DS2 is normal size.

Cake and busicuits are normally available. However some chocolate is still left in the single Xmas selection box they each got not that I blame them, local chocolate is rank

Thank you. I agree I don't want to go the other way by making sugar a big issue but it's so hard. Only dh can understand and he's at a loss as much as me.

Even baking turns into a headache. Ds keeps eating the mixture even if we say not to (he can lick the bowl at the end). He won't leave the cakes alone until cooled, keeps poking his finger in or will say he will eat still hot.

Even if we say no, wait, and actually take him out of the kitchen he'd keep asking every 3 minutes if they're ready. I'll tell him he can have one at 4 o'clock he won't stop.

I didn't say but in the past I've caught him eating out of the bin, stale cake. He hasn't done that for a long time but those are the lengths he'll go to.

My brother is terrible, as soon as he got his paper round he'd buy a huge carrier bag full of chocolate bars and eat them all. He'd eat spoonfuls of sugar. He's always been slim but all his teeth eventually went rotten and had to be removed. So worried about ds going the same way.

We eat the cake hot!! It's yummy 🙊

There's no problem eating the cake hot. That's not the problem here.

If I let ds eat the cake hot he'd have another, then another, he'd eat the whole batch.

Ok. I see. Mine like the sweet stuff, but also seem to have an off switch. I ment to add we also eat (test!) the raw mixture, but I guess if you did that, not much would make it into the oven.

I think I'd go with what someone above suggested - this is the treat stuff for the week, when it's gone, it's gone. He could then binge, but there would be no more til you'd gone shopping. Would that work at all?

Brilliant "healthy" cake recipe is Jack Monroe's vegan banana bread - majority of sweetness comes from the bananas and it really is lovely.

cookingonabootstrap.com/2015/08/11/extra-wholesome-banana-bread-vegan/

YANBU Mangomohito that sounds very difficult. Your DS clearly has a sweet tooth (I think most children do don't they?) but this sounds extreme. I guess as he gets older he will have more self control but in the meantime you just have to watch him like a hawk. I'm sorry, this isn't very helpful I know.

My son is just 9 yo and asks for sweets after dinner each evening without fail. Every few evenings I will let him have a small handful as I don't want to make a big thing about sweets but I do tell him that sweets are not for everyday and that he must take care of his teeth.

Is your DS able to explain why he feels such a need to eat cakes and sugary snacks in such quantities?

I have 2 school age children, year 5 and year 2.

Year 5:
Breakfast is cereal
Snack at school of fruit
Lunch is school dinners in the week.
Has school milk in the ?afternoon.
Dinner varies - pasta, noodles, bruschetta, pancakes, couscous, scrambled egg on toast, sausage and mash, nuggets, burger...

Rarely has anything else. Occasional pudding - ice cream, fruit or yogurt usually.

Year 2:
Breakfast is cereal or bread and butter (this morning it was both).
Snack at school of fruit
Lunch is school dinner - nearly always has half a baked potato with cucumber plus pudding though.
Snack when he gets home - fruit, sometimes a bag of crisps or cereal bar.
Dinner as above - but he's far fussier so sometimes will fill up on bread and butter rather than eat what I've made.

Both drink fruit juice with breakfast and dinner usually. Water otherwise, occasionally hot chocolate. If we have a film afternoon they'll share some microwave popcorn while we watch it.

I've just asked him that question. He said he loves sweets and they're so hard to resist. He said if he could eat all that without rotting his teeth he'd eat it all day and night.

Now he's 8 I can at least talk to him about the sugar in foods, but he's got his sensible head on now. Put a box of biscuits in front of him and he's got no off button at all.

Take free samples as an example, so we go to the supermarket and he knows that mid way through there might be free samples. So all I get from the moment we walk in is asking if he can go straight to the free samples. When we get to that bit after much going on, if there aren't any he gets annoyed. He even asked once if they'd put some out for him. Of course I told him afterwards he shouldn't but that's what I'm dealing with on a supermarket shop.

Tried buying in just say a pack of kitkats once they're gone they're gone. It's no hardship for him though because he knows well meaning relatives will indulge him at weekends. He's also very very habit forming, if I buy a multipack he'd fully expect the same every week. He'd eat whatever was there/he was allowed before his dinner then not touch his meal. If I said only after dinner he'd keep on and have a tantrum promising to still eat his dinner, but then he wouldn't.

Appreciate the baking recipes, we've had banana bread a few times and he loves it.

My ds is 5 and has:
Breakfast: bowl of crunchy nut cornflakes, bowl of porridge and a piece of toast.

Lunch: sandwich, crisps, yogurt, fruit x2

Snacks: carrot sticks or apple, sometimes a chocolate biscuit

Tea: a smaller portion of whatever we have, so pasta, casserole, stew, risotto, etc..
Pudding: yogurt, fruit, icecream, jelly or rice pudding.

He's on the 50th percentile and very active and happy!

It definitely sounds like a behaviour thing rather than a diet thing

Is it worth seeing the doctor?

My dd is 8 since December. She is petite and very slim.
Breakfast
Bowl of cereal. Usually Special k, or shreddies or cheerios. Sometimes coco pops or frosties, whatever she fancies.
School lunch
Bagel with cheese. Cheese dipper. Banana (doesn't usually eat)
After school snack
Wrap with nutella.
Snack
Apple
Banana if still hungry before dinner. Sometimes bag of popcorn too if really hungry. She doesn't like any kind of berries, or grapes, in fact fruit wise she really only eats apples or bananas.
Dinner
Chicken, veg, roast and baked potatoes and gravy./fish pie/pasta bake/stew. She loves potatoes and is good for eating her veg.
Biscuit or bun or chocolate for afters.
She eats large portions (same as her sister who is 13 and slightly chubby) but has always been slim probably because she is quite active. This is a typical school day, at weekends we would have pizza or burgers or fry up for dinner and probably more snacks such as crisps or sweets.
I don't worry about her sugar intake at all, as long as she is healthy and takes care of her teeth.

5.5yo son. Has cereal and a yoghurt for breakfast, 2 biscuits, fruit and a carton of juice mid morning, sandwiches, cheesy crackers, yoghurt, fruit, popcorn/flapjack and a smoothie for dinner, then a cooked tea (about half of my portion) followed by fruit and a biscuit for pudding and sometimes another piece of fruit after.

I agree with *MrsHathaway" it sounds more like behaviour or a compulsion. Your GP may be able to offer advice, or point you towards someone who could advise you?

You say your brother was similar as a boy so perhaps there is a link somehow. Ultimately though if he has no "off switch" then he is going to have to learn to self-regulate and until he can do this for himself you, his dad and your wider family are going to have to do it for him.

Can you ask your family not to buy sweets and cakes for a few months to try and help your DS get his cravings under control and so that he stops expecting there to be cakes and biscuits when he visits them?

Dd is 4yr 10 months and deemed overweight

Mon-fri

7:45 breakfast club at school (mon & tue) is crap sugar laden cereal and or toast some fruit and fruit juice or milk.
(Wed-fri) breakfast at home is either eggs n wholemeal toast, porridge topped with berries/nuts, or wheetabix n chopped banana and small glass of milk

10:30 ish they get milk n a snack which is fruit n a biscuit

12noon school dinner and pudding.

15:30 (mon & tue) after school club fruit/salady bits, chocolate/jam/ham sandwiches on white bread, scotch pancakes, crisps. Dd has had it drilled she pics some fruit or salad and one other thing not everything available. Wed to thur when I pick her up she doesn't tend to have a snack but if she does hummus n carrot, little bit of cheese n grapes

18:00 tea at home. Off a side plate a little of portion of what we are having always plenty of veg. Tonight it's Spanish chicken and wholemeal pasta. No pudding cos she gets one at school

Tbh my biggest bug bear at the mo is the food at school. Breakfast and after school club is really sugary and carb heavy :-/

Thank you for sharing. It doesn't sound like my ds diet is much different to most mentioned.

I have thought about seeing the GP. It's a bit embarrassing though I'm worried they'll just think it's me. Or that because he so slim they'll think I'm not feeding him properly or I'm just overreacting. When you just say "my son has a very sweet tooth" it seems so trivial, but perhaps I should and at least get some professional advice?

Dh and I are forever asking grandparents not to give him loads of sweets. To be fair both sides have got much better, but they still have to give a 'little' something, and leave stuff lying around.

All I ever get is how he's so slim I don't need to worry, but I'm trying to get him to change is behaviour.

By the way I never restrict healthy food. He has free access to fruit, plenty of other snacks like eggs, cheese, crackers, crumpets and he can have seconds for dinner if he's hungry, he only wants chocolate, cake, sweets etc.

I have a nearly 8 year old, he's slim (borderline underweight but athletic build - does a lot of sport).

Breakfast - 2 weetabix with milk
Snack - piece of fruit, granola bar or graze box
Lunch - school dinner. Usually cheese sandwich, cheese and crackers and yoghurt or raisins
Snack - veg and hummus/piece of fruit/rice cakes and peanut butter
Dinner - varies - tofu stir fry, veg bolognaise, roast tomato pasta, veg curry, soup and bread etc (he's a vegetarian)
Pudding - yoghurt or sweet/chocolate from Easter/Halloween/Christmas.

He's very good at self regulating, he will often leave food or find cake too sweet etc. However I worry about DS2 who LOVES food - seems always hungry and at 9 months old is already half DS1's weight! I think we will probably need to regulate his eating more. Children are so different!
Good luck!

Mine are 6, 8 and 10 and probably eat too much junky snacks but perfectly healthy, active and not remotely overweight.

Breakfast
Cereal or toast plus fruit

Snack at school fruit (half the time nit eaten by older ones)

School dinner or packed lunch sandwich, salad, choc biscuit.

Cereal bar or biscuit after school.

Home cooked tea or sandwich and salad if had school dinner and we are going to activities.

Generally quite a lot of biscuits, a few sweets, we have them in the house but they eat 2 or 3 at a time not a whole packet. Both daughters have a bad chocolate habit same as me but again eat a couple of squares rather than a mars or similar. I try to limit crisps to 3-4 times a week. They should have healthier snacks really but always have fruit/veg with every meal so I can't be bothered to stress about it.

I think you go to the GP and present it as a behaviour issue rather than a diet issue. If he were younger you'd go through the health visitors and get into the behavioural strategies thing.

If he liked swimming/tennis/climbing but had to be dragged away from the computer, to the extent that you had to lock all your electronics in the safe otherwise he'd sneak them and play until his eyes melted ... well then that wouldn't be a diet issue but a compulsion issue. Sugar is as addictive as computer games.

May be completely off piste here, but candida can cause extreme sugar cravings. If it is in the gut or elsewhere inside the body, it isn't always obvious. Probiotics, limiting sugar, general gut health all help. Might be worth checking out/mentioning to gp if you do go?

A friend suffers with this intermittently, and was exactly as you describe your ds with sugary stuff as a child.