Hi, my dd 4 goes to pre-school & is thriving she absolutely loves it, she does 3 activities a week & has a sibling who is 2.7 years (15 months between dd1 & dd2). For the past year a mum at the playschool has been very persistant about playdates (detest that word), last year we went twice & I found it very stifling, she hovered over the girls who just wanted to play with the toys insisting they colour, "play kitchens" play dollies I just wanted to say just let them be.... She started waiting for me after school saying what way will we do playdates this week so I nipped it in the bud... Dd1 has her activities, sister & other lovely kids on our road & I felt I was being railroaded into having to do a meetup weekly.
Fast forward to September & dd1 had been talking about the little girl (who btw is absolutely lovely) her mum asked for a playdate & I said sure as dd1 chatted about her at home.. The playdate went well & I invited them to our house the following week, I said around 10.30 would suit us as DD1 has dance in the evening, she said I do my weekly shop around that time would 12 suit, I said the girls have lunch then but 12.30 suits me, at 11.55 her & her dd arrived, she said I hope you don't mind we're early, thought we would give the kids more time to play, my dds were just sitting down to their lunch!!!! She stayed for 2 & 1/2 hours despite my heavy hints that dd has to get ready for dance.
After that again it was back to what suits you for a playdate this week, she wouldn't take no for an answer. DD2 & I really enjoy waiting for dd to come out of nursery but for a few days we didn't get a chance to even give her a hug as this lady insisted on pushing her daughter on top of dd & insisting they walk holding hands together...! DD1 got sick of that & started running along with the little boys on our road...
The lady then started waiting in her car & when she could see me & dd2 walking along she would get out of her car just as we were walking past, after 4/5 days of this I started leaving extra early so I was the first at the school gate... her pattern changed too so now I'm back to being just on time...
Today after the school collection, she was waiting for me at the gates, She asked were we free for a playdate on Thurs I said no as dd is very busy with her activities & I am very busy with my work (I work from home) so we are having as relaxing a week as we can, then she said well why don't we go for a coffee then before the school pick up... I said I can't as dd2 has a music class
I am at the end of my tether, my girls really enjoy each others company & play so well, as there's only 15 months between dd1 &dd2 they are fantastic friends so I like them having their special time, I want time with my kids myself, they play really well with the neighbourhood kids & have lots of spontaneous playdates. I also don't have anything in common with this mum & all the playdates we have had were quite uncomfortable with just small chat. AIBU to feel pressurised, ambushed & cornered... I have nothing against playdates but this mum wanted a weekly scheduled date & just won't take no for an answer... Vent over.