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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To still park here?

94 replies

MissJSays · 17/01/2017 00:20

Basically there is no parking at my university. To get a permit to park in the uni car park costs just under £700 a year. There is a church down the road from the campus which has a car park, me and 2 of the other girls park there for 3 hours 2 days per week. Today I was leaving when a woman came out of the church and said 'you can't park here because you're not part of the church.' I said 'oh right' she went on to say 'because I know you do it all the time.' She said it in such a rude and patronising tone but I was caught off guard with a million bags in my hand so didn't have much to say back.

What are the rules, who owns churches? Are they owned by the council? If so am I allowed to park there? There are no signs there at all relating to parking, nothing saying you can or cannot park there.

I'll also add in 3 years at uni she is the only person I've ever seen anywhere near the church, it always seems closed.
Any advice would be much appreciated!

OP posts:
ShatnersWig · 17/01/2017 09:04

sparechange Even if that is true, that does not give anyone the right to simply park in someone else's car park. That land belongs to the church. Presumably, you wouldn't have a problem if someone just decided they needed to park somewhere and used your drive or blocked your drive because, you know, it doesn't matter who owns it and you've clearly got plenty of money because you live in a nice house?

The numerous parking threads on MN would tend to say not.

user1477282676 · 17/01/2017 09:10

Join the church and keep parking there. Ignore the rude lady.

neonrainbow · 17/01/2017 09:10

I would just carry on parking there if there's no signs up. Or just pop into the church for 5 minutes a day and tell them you've found god.

Dulra · 17/01/2017 09:12

The church would own the car park but if they have not done anything to prevent people parking there I assume they really don't mind that you do. If they did they would run a pay and display system as some churches in Ireland do in busy towns or put signs up advising it is private parking and no parking. There is a church down the road from me opposite a busy pub and loads of people attending the pub park there. The church has signs up saying the gates can be locked at any time but people still risk it because they are never locked lol.

ShatnersWig I do not think the Church (which lets face it is a public building that anyone can worship in, last I looked it wasn't members only) would compare their grounds to someone's private driveway

ShatnersWig · 17/01/2017 09:18

The postings about the money that the C of E may or may not have aren't necessarily relevant. We don't even know if this is a C of E church. It may be Catholic (which has even more money). Or it could be Baptist, Methodist, Congregational, Free Evangelic, most of which do not have sums of money, do not get assistance from the state (as C of E does), do not have their churches unlocked during the day for people to wander into and gaze at because they tend not to be architecturally pretty.

The point is it's someone's private property and you shouldn't just feel entitled to park where you like, regardless of whether there are signs up or not. It's the attitude that you can just do what the heck you want on someone's else's land.

TENSHI · 17/01/2017 09:19

Fidelia you are obviously one of the lovely, naiive, charitable, kindhearted souls that have been duped/conned about your diocese's financial affairs.

Actually, perhaps don't do any research into this as you might be upset to find that what I and Spare have written is the truth.

There is a financial reason why your church asks for donations as do charities and even some newspapers in place of subscriptions...

But please don't stop being generous, churches depend on it as it means they don't have to sell off their share portfolio and keep their wineries, shares in diamond mining and all the rest.

One look into the work at the very well paid man who heads the CofE's investment portfolio or even their well paid land agents will give you a glimpse of the extent of the Church's true wealth.

Why do you think Henry VIII wanted to separate his church from the Catholic church? Because he wanted the money and assets of course Hmm

ShatnersWig · 17/01/2017 09:23

Tenshi All of that has absolutely nothing to do with parking

WhatchaMaCalllit · 17/01/2017 09:24

I was going to suggest that you get there a few minutes early and nip into the church to say a prayer, then you are part of the church and the woman who spoke to you can't complain. You're too busy to make it to mass but you can say a prayer or two...
Alternatively, contact the vicar/priest and put yourself at their mercy. Perhaps it may result in you taking part in the next fete or some such as payment for parking there....Smile

picklemepopcorn · 17/01/2017 09:26

I think the church would compare their drive to a private driveway... Because we need to park in it to unload our shopping, get our mobility impaired members into church etc. Depending on the church, different activities happen on different days. In my church, one morning CAB use it (foc), another it hosts a toddler group. Once a month a lunch club for older folk in the community. There are evening activities, too. Of course unpredictable events like funerals. If OP is there 9-5, for example, she may not see how busy it is 10-3!

The national church owns land, investments and buildings, but the buildings are money pits and they have large numbers of elderly and retired staff to pay pensions for, vicar salaries to pay etc.

Individual churches do not have access to centrally held funds. The running costs of the church (heating, repairs) are paid by the congregation members. Some churches have endowments which provide income, most do not and are struggling.

It would be polite to ask.

grannytomine · 17/01/2017 09:27

The problem with a church car park is you don't know when they might need all the spaces e.g. if there is a funeral service while you are at uni are you happy that you would be preventing a mourner parking?

At a church local to me people use the car park as there is a row of shops nearby with double yellow lines outside them. The church couldn't stop people using the car park so they put donation boxes in the shops asking people to make a donation for parking. I thought that was a good idea.

RhodaBull · 17/01/2017 09:27

If the OP had said she was parking in a pub car park ("Well, it's 10am and no one's in there...") I'm sure there would have been different responses.

Simply by mentioning "church" some posters feel quite justified in thinking that the OP is absolutely right and the church - naturally - absolutely wrong.

CheerfullyIndifferent · 17/01/2017 09:43

I have allocated parking spaces with my house, there are no barriers or anything. Does that mean that, because I haven't done anything to prevent people from parking in them, they are fair game? My local retail park is public and everyone can shop there, doesn't mean that anyone can park in their car park though, does it? Retail park car park is for shoppers, church car park is for church goers. Not too hard a concept to grasp.

While it might always look quiet when you park there, loads can happen whilst you are at uni and, presumably, not watching the church car park or events that might be happening.

I personally am not a church goer, but my DD goes to Brownies in a church. When she was in Rainbows, there were also Quran lessons roughly at the same time - the car park was awfully busy, but if you arrived, say, 15 minutes before the starting time, you'd be excused for thinking no one ever parks in the car park.

Just have a word with the vicar.

imsodizzy · 17/01/2017 09:45

My grandparents attend a church that is in the centre of town and has a large parking area. They buy a yearly pass which is £30 which entitles them to park there anytime, whether they're attending church or popping into town. As others had suggested I'd see the vicar and discuss being able to park there, the worst he can say is no.

imsodizzy · 17/01/2017 09:45

My grandparents attend a church that is in the centre of town and has a large parking area. They buy a yearly pass which is £30 which entitles them to park there anytime, whether they're attending church or popping into town. As others had suggested I'd see the vicar and discuss being able to park there, the worst he can say is no.

RTKangaMummy · 17/01/2017 09:48

IMHO YABU

it does belong to the church or pub or doctors surgery or who paid for it's upkeep - it doesn't matter who it belongs to but it belongs to a group of people who you aren't one of

You don't know that when you have left your car that there haven't been playgroups, funerals or church meetings or coffee mornings or anything taking place at the church that they have wanted to park there

Like if your uni car park was free to park in but you couldn't find a space cos commuters or shoppers used it to park in you would be annoyed

IMHO you should drive part of the way and park in a PAG car park and the catch a bus that way you don't have to take over 2 hours or whatever time it would take for multiple buses etc but you aren't causing a nuisance to the church community

PastysPrincess · 17/01/2017 09:52

A church carpark is private land just the same as your house is private. Parking there is akin to parking on someones driveway. If you don't attend the church then you shouldn't park there, just as you wouldn't park in a driveway without knowing the occupant.

PimmsIsMyDrinkOfChoice · 17/01/2017 09:52

My local church runs various clubs and activities during the week and the car park is often full at 11.00 on a wednesday, 3.30 on a thursday.
The car park tends to be empty at either end of the working day, doesn't mean it's not being used during the day.

PastysPrincess · 17/01/2017 09:55

In fact you are very lucky you haven't been locked in yet. My husband decided to park in a church car park once (he stupidly felt entitled to because my mum worked for the church at the time) and got locked in as they closed the gates as a security measure. He didn't get much sympathy from me.

RTKangaMummy · 17/01/2017 10:00

The other thing is, it is you and 2 other girls, so do you actually mean 3 cars?

If so why can't you car share to a local pay and go (PAG) car park then catch the bus to uni

PaulAnkaTheDog · 17/01/2017 10:07

This thread is bizarre. Any other place and you would be told unanimously YABU but because it's a church some people think it's fine?! You wouldn't know if you were stopping people from parking, a generic mass or a funeral mass take nowhere near the three hours that the op is leaving her car for, so she has no idea whether she is stopping people from parking.

xStefx · 17/01/2017 10:16

Its owned by the church so its a private car park. They do have the right to enforce clamping but as its a church ill assume they don't do stuff like that. They probably just assume most people will actually have respect. Whatever we say I think you have already made up your mind to continue to park there anyway.

if you asked the vicar for permission to park there 3 hours for 2 days per week and offer a contribution then that would at least be less cheeky. if someone parked on my drive because I didn't use it I would still be pissed!

RTKangaMummy · 17/01/2017 10:36

The other thing is you didn't even think about searching on Internet to see what regular things happened in the church during the week by searching for the church website

That wouldn't tell you about funerals which I think makes your idea of taking 3 car parking spaces along with your friends totally wrong

You also never thought it might be polite to ask at the vicarage or church office

YABU and your friends ABU and very selfish in your collective behaviour Angry

CheerfullyIndifferent · 17/01/2017 10:44

Well, to be fair to the OP, she thought it was public. Now she knows it's not.

TheFairyCaravan · 17/01/2017 10:50

Why would anyone think a church car park is a public car park? Common sense says it's for the users of the church.

I don't get this thread either. Just because it's a church it's fine, but if it was a pub, shop, doctor's surgery the responses would be different.

YABU.

CheerfullyIndifferent · 17/01/2017 11:18

TheFairyCaravan naivety, I'd like to think. Smile

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