to think this driving instructor can't just send DD home because she isn't doing that well?

[DD2NC]

It's DD's 3rd lesson. She's doing okay, driving around, but needing to still have some reminders called out to her. He said to her at the start of this lesson (3rd) that he is going to try not calling out and see how she does, she did struggle a bit and after about 45 mins in, she is back at my door! (Meant to be 2 hours) and he normally calls out to me (I'm always out the front) I work in the garage and he said "she isn't concentrating today, so we are going to give it a miss" I didn't see the issue with that until I spoke to her and she still had to pay for an hour and that she doesn't understand how she wasn't concentrating, she just wasn't doing everything perfectly. I think this is awful tbh, AIBU?

Amused:Three lessons in I was still driving around a quiet industrial estate or the demolished housing estate a few miles away.

Lucky you. Lots of people don't have that option. Wish I'd had!

Is there - being a devil's advocate - any possibility that she wasn't actually concentrating? In all walks of life I have known talented people with great ability who are normally very accurate have an off day where they don't concentrate and, as a result, keeping making mistakes.

I know my former driving instructor, who was brilliant, would occasionally finish a lesson early if she felt carrying on would be counter productive. Sometimes, if you continually get things wrong, it becomes self-fulfilling, you worry more, and make even more mistakes. In that situation, may well be better to finish the lesson early. I think as long as that lesson only counts as one hour not two, it might not be unreasonable.

If, however, all she did was make one or two minor mistakes, then he's out of order.

Why is he updating you?
Does DD have learning difficulties? it seems so odd to do this otherwise!

Driving does demand so much concentration especially in the early stages of learning, sometimes it is hard to keep up those high levels of concentration and you start making mistakes. However if he took an hours money, he should have give a full hours lesson. He sounds impatient and quite rude tbh, she's not at not school, he's providing a paid for service and your dd is the customer, I'd expect better. I'd get a refund and sack him off.

I had one instructor who I liked, but didn't do very well with, he seemed to just want to get the most hours possible out of me, so wouldn't move onto new things, kept saying I had to book double lessons etc. So I switched. To another who was a complete bastard and I did one hour and never again. Third instructor was wonderful. Credit him completely for me passing my test. It really will make a difference and this one sounds ridiculous!

I would look for another driving instructor.

I had one driving lesson when I was quite young where I was really struggling and got really flustered and the instructor said 'Tell you what - shall I drive us back to your house, and then we'll just use the last 15 minutes to go through some theory stuff, as I can tell you're not really feeling it today.' However, he did leave the choice up to me and I still had a full hour of his time - he didn't just drop me off after 45 minutes and expect me to pay for an hour! And

I would check whether he had a current Driving Instructor licence too.

Absolutely you should get a refund and find a different instructor.

But personally I think two hour lessons are far too long for learning. I've been driving for years and I'm ready for a break after two hours. Two hours is too long for that level of concentration.

Another vote for change instructor. I had a lovely calm instructor who was super. Did nothing but build my confidence up. I think more frequent one hour lessons are generally better in the beginning and then two hour lessons when you're getting more confident and getting ready to take the test.

2 hours is very long. Are all lessons that long now? I'd have thought that in the early days, an hour would be enough to concentrate hard and once you're a few lessons in, you could start having longer lessons.

xpost with tinky

Best to change. I had a few before i found the right man to calm my nerves.
Your poor dd though, i can sympathise and ive been driving for years.
Try to get a refund for the hour he didnt take her out for.
Might be a battle though, he sounds an a hole!

i would change sounds like he cant be bothered or double booked

i had an instructor used to turn up late end lessons early i got rid in the end she still coudnt understand why

As someone who passed their test late in life due to being totally demoralised by an instructor I think your daughter needs to consider if this is the right person for her. I put off learning for years due to a bad experience but I was not assertive enough at the time to say to my instructor that it was not working. On the plus side after taking an eight year break I found an amazing driving instructor who got me to a first time pass with 15 hours of lessons. Obviously the first guy must have done something for me to retain driving skills and for me to pass so quickly years later. However he made me feel useless and never really fed back how I was progressing. In contrast, no 2 just chatted away, told me I could do it and made me tackle my demons from the first day because 'you may as well face the hard stuff now'. TBH, that man changed my life in a small but significant way.

Agree with Tinkly two hours is too long, the concentration starts going after the first hour.
I'd get a new instructor. The problem is that when you're learning you don't know you've got a bad instructor. I had 4 different ones until I found an instructor I felt comfortable with he made a huge difference, until then I just thought I was a terrible learner who would never be able to drive but with him I passed really quickly
Can any of her friends recommend a good one? The best ones usually come from word of mouth and make all the difference.

All the driving schools in our area do 2 hours. None offer hour ones and all her friends do 2 hours too! Maybe it's an area thing??

I was lucky. Mine was also a lorry driver, automatic specialist, and incredibly laid back..😊 he took it at my pace, helped me adapt to my disability (CP), and work around it to gain my confidence, and towards the end would sit back, choose a scenic route to somewhere nice, and say "I'm going to read the paper, don't bend my car".

He also ordered me to take the car solo one day after we witnessed an HGV fall over in front of us - he went to help the driver out of the overturned cab, and told me to take the car and get help from the local plod.

Look around.. The right instructor really does help. Passed second time.

DD My Dd failed 3 times with one instructor and then moved to the instructor who had taught her bf. She had moved in with him by then. She had 2 hour lessons as quite rural and needed to be driving where her test would be. Passed first time with a clean sheet. Change instructors.
My dad was one for about thirty years. He would have never ever treated a pupil in that way.

Change instructors and ask for the money back.
I paid for 20 lessons with someone and after 4-5 I couldnt do it anymore.
I told him we werent a good fit and asked for my money back.

I got another instructor and passed 2 months ago.

My son has just started having lessons and his are always 2 hours too. It makes sense to me - the first few minutes they're discussing what they're going to do that day and where they're going to go then they head off. When they get back, there's a few more minutes to review how it all went.
I remember back when I was learning (years ago!) an hour really wasn't long enough, especially if the traffic was bad

Agree that you should try and find a different instructor - maybe ask any of her friends if they are learning to drive and if they would recommend their instructor? That's what I did.

And definitely ask for a refund if you're ditching the current knob instructor