To think your child doesn't need a snack in a 30-minute toddler class?

[Mummyreindeerlegz]

Sorry for the long title.

Why is it some parents give their one year old snacks during really short classes (or at all during classes!)? A one year old wandering around with a soggy rice cake, dropping bits is grim. Wait half an hour or give them a snack before you come.

Please tell me why people think this is ok? Fully prepared to be told I am being unreasonable.

Dani, the thing is that yes, children may need to be entertained / distracted in church, but no, that distraction doesn't have to be food. Stickers, and paper to stick them onto. Crayons and paper. Playmobil / Duplo figures to set up on a hassock. A well-known book to thumb through, perhaps the sort with textured items on each page. One church we went to used to have all manner of quiet distractions of this type in drawstring bags that would be given out to families on arrival, with the hymn books.

I think what many people on this thread are challenging is the automatic assumption that 'my child is bored / has to do something they don't want to / is unhappy / needs to be occupied/wants parental attention' equals 'my child needs a snack'.

I'm not a fan of grazing culture. I wasn't organised enough to tote loads of snacks around anyway, although I vaguely remember some emergency ginger nuts in a tub as DS1 had a selection of food allergies.

I support the emergency banana (I take bananas around DS1's gymnastics lesson so he doesn't get too hungry and grouchy to cooperate), but lots of snacks aimed at children are misleading in their health claims. Rice cakes have little purpose, constant consumption of rasins is bad for teeth. Many of these snacks aren't filling and will trigger a surge then slump in blood sugars, and thus the grazing cycle continues.

I'm not adverse to giving something on request if it's a sensible gap between meals as appetites can fluctuate, but my DCs eat well at meals and ask infequently.

It's surely not a coincidence that the growth snacking/ grazing culture in fairly recent years has occured with a rise in overweight/ obese children.

cantkeepawayforever yes there are other distractions. None of the ones you mentioned would keep the interest of my 17 month old twins for more than 10 minutes, and even then they wouldn't be quiet while doing any of those things. They would be dropping the Duplo, loudly pointing out the duck in the book, eating and then choking on the stickers - a snack would keep their mouths full at least . I don't see why those distractions are preferable to a snack?

It depends, doesn't it, on what else they're eating, whether the size of their meals is adjusted to take into account snack food consumed and whether the snack is a 1-off weekly event in church or whether they are constantly snacking everywhere?

I do wonder whether those people who say 'well, they don't eat much at meals so they need lots of snacks throughout the day' or 'they prefer to eat little and often rather than 3 meals + mid morning and mid afternoon snacks' have a cause-and-effect thing going on....

Yes it does depend on all those things! And the only people that know the answers to those things are: the parents that you are judging!

Oh well, HairSpray and Darlink will just have to exercise some Christian charity in my direction. The only place I take a snack is church, because while I don't mind hauling an epic tantrum in human form around Tesco / toddler group / into the car / out of Ikea / wherever else, it's always seemed a bit off to do it in church when it could be alleviated with an entirely silent tub with a few nuts and berries in. I do feed her breakfast obviously but she's used to having elevenses at about 11am which is right in the middle of the service (other days we're at home). We leave the house at 10 and we're not back til 12.30, service is usually 10.30 - midday. Before and after she's had a snack she'll happily play quietly with the little toys at the back of the church with all the other toddlers. I had no idea people felt so strongly about what I thought was a pragmatic solution....

The children's church (which she's too young for) give them all a drink and a biscuit at around that time so if they don't expect the older ones to go through, I don't see why it should be different for littler ones.

They would be dropping the Duplo, loudly pointing out the duck in the book

I think that's fine in a family service. Tantrums not so much.

YABU. A toddler doesn't understand they are at class and can't have a snack. If a child is hungry they just want to be fed.

Obviously if the child is hungry/recovering from illness/has food isssues/or any other issues that means their carer knows they need frequent snacks, it's wholly unnecessary.
My BF has always done this with hers pretty much as soon as they are eating solids. They'll be sitting happily playing and she marches up and force feeds them Quavers or gives them a (big) bag of chocolate buttons to eat, then seem quite bemused when they refuse their lunch less than an hour later
I do judge but bite my tongue. Not my child, not my business.

at 'entitled' toddlers.
Live and let live I say.

I was discussing this with a friend earlier today as this obsession with snacks is bordering on the ridiculous. I know people who won't leave the house without a rucksack full of snacks. They are literally popping out for a few hours in the afternoon to visit a friend laden down with a months worth of snacks. Everywhere I go there are women bombarding their kids with little packets and pots of this and that, and then stressing when their child won't eat it's lunch or dinner.

I am totally with Ray. My two year old has severe GERD and food allergies. This last two years have been a living nightmare. He is profoundly underweight and as Ray stated, unless he puts weight on is hospitalised. So... yes. YABVVVVU. Like many things in life, there are many situations. Not all parents are 'entitled'. Some are just trying to have as normal a life as possible outside of regular hospital visits, vomiting episodes and utter misery.

And yes. Some parents just want to give their a child a snack because...well, because they want to.
Unless you a forming a branch of the snack police, get over yourself.

I get why you would be annoyed as it's hard with kids with with allergies. I have 2 DS with dairy and other allergies but I could bring myself to be worked up about other people and how and when they feed their child. I put all my energy into making sure they learn what is safe for them rather that what others are doing. Even my not quite 13month old now puts bits he finds on the floor (usually from DD as she is very messy) in the bin not his mouth. Older DS has a contact allergy so he knows to leave well alone.

OP it has nothing to do with you how others choose to feed their children, lots of toddlers snack. Stop being so judgey!!

Couldn't bring myself

DD would have/will happily wait till her next meal and if I say dinner is in an hour she's say okay and skip off. DS will kick off royally in public and ruin the whole class for himself and others if I don't remove him or give him a snack.
I think a lot of the 'the won't die after 30 mins' brigade just have kids who are chilled out. After a day with my little devil you'll be so glad of an emergency banana.

I've never carried snacks about for DD apart from the odd emergency bag of rice cakes or similar when she was very small. She's never really snacked - not even in the afternoon between lunch and dinner. I found early on that if she ate anything, so much as a tiny biscuit, she wouldn't eat much of her actual meal. No snacks, and she eats decent meals including all the veg and protein. She almost never says she's hungry between meals (she certainly will do if she is), and she has lots of water available and milk if she feels like it.

I too was a bit bemused by the snacking culture for toddlers - stopping them half-way through an hour's soft play class in order to give them a snack, for example! Can they really not manage without? I don't ever snack - I think I just never got into the habit, my mum didn't do snacks when I was a child - and tbh it just doesn't occur to me to think about snacks. I used to feel bad when I was out and about and other mums would be constantly pulling out pots of grapes, breadsticks, biscuits and so on but DD regarded these with suspicion anyway and never seemed to lose out by not having them!

(Oh and DD is definitely not chilled-out - she's high-energy and never stops, doesn't seem to need snacks despite that though! As I said above though she does eat well at meals, eats healthily, has a good appetite, isn't much bothered about sweet stuff, is a normal weight and will stop when she's full. Occasionally she has the odd less hungry day when she picks at things but that's rare.)

DS wasn't a regular meal time eater so we had to take snacks with us. We did lots of classes ,before I had him I was a nanny and everyone had snacks for their babies/ toddlers then too so it's not a new thing ime.

DS is 15 now and has only just started eating properly at meal times. All kids are different.

The children are only in church for 20 minutes till they go to their class!!

I'm from a huge family .
We went to church from when we were tiny . No kids ' clubs back in the day.

My mother would no more have whipped out a Tupperware box full of grapes than dance naked at communion.

When did this become a thing ?

And I've always queried the logic in ' he doesn't eat much at mealtimes so I have to give him regular snacks "

Hmmm... Maybe it's the other way round ?

So you'd let a one year old go hungry for 20 mins?

And I've always queried the logic in ' he doesn't eat much at mealtimes so I have to give him regular snacks

Some small children just don't 'get' mealtimes. They usually figure it out eventually but no point making a battle out of it. Some children/people are grazers.

It's incensed me recently when the child was eating a full blown picnic at 10.30! Drives me nuts. It's lazy parenting they just throw a load of snacks to entertain the kid instead of having to monitor their kids movements

He could be diabetic and have diabetic hypos on non-diabetic Hypoglaecaemia or another medical condition that means he needs a boost every now and then? Or be a fussy eater/selective eater at meal times so needs snacks to prevent him becoming undernourished?

just RTFT thread (more or less) and I see he has been eating lots of rice cakes, That does sound a bit much for a toddler. Maybe there is something going on here? I wonder about Prader- Wili, where the appetite is out of control but usually parents in that situation try to keep food away from the kid because PWS kids have low muscle tone so can't exercise as much and can put weight on easily? I don't know. I admit as a kid my mum went through stages of underfeeding me and overfeeding me. Wasn't abusive, she just was a fussy mother when it came to food.