Pretty sure IANBU but these people think I am?

[harrypotternerd]

Long story so will try to keep it as short as possible. My dp's birthday is new years eve, so I planned a party for him, it was a BBQ and people were told to bring their own drinks. My DC went to their father's house for a week and it because of that we had said no children. People all got back to me and said they were coming and that was all good. No one mentioned about bringing children or extra people. We supplied all the food which we did based on the numbers who said were coming. On NYE one couple turned up with 4 extra adults and 2 toddlers. My DP and I were not exactly happy about this but did not say anything as it was DP's father's house and we did not want to cause any trouble at his house. There are extensions going on at the house so we said if the toddlers were going to go outside they needed to be supervised, there is also an old dog who is friendly but I did not think a toddler should be left unsupervised, especially since the dog has arthritis and I did not want the dog to snap at the toddler. DP's father and I were outside at the BBQ, organising the meat. The BBQ is at the side of the house so we cannot see the garden from it. Nobody told us that the toddlers were outside. We suddenly hear a scream so we both run around to the garden and one of the toddlers is sitting near the extension work and crying. He had scraped his arm on a nail. I take him inside to his mother who then complains that she needs a break as well and it's NYE and it was not fair that I wasn't watching her son and did not deal with the injury. DP's father told her there was not supposed to be any children here in the first place, that we had no idea that she was coming and she was told to not let the toddlers out the back unsupervised.
My DP also had enough when we realised they were drinking our drinks because they did not bring any and said that it was enough and the toddlers had to go home (it was about 9pm at this stage). These people are now bad mouthing us on Facebook and I have received messages off their friends telling me how unreasonable we were. So WIBU?

What a bunch of freeloading irresponsible shitbags! Post sock's text in response. Rrrr.

Presumably you have mutual friends who were also invited? Do they not think it odd that you told them they couldn't bring kids and to bring their own drinks, but for some strange reason you not only invited 4 extra strangers but this couple's children and offered to look after the dc and provided their alcohol? I'd find offering to supervise other people's dc whilst hosting a party strange in itself tbh.

What twats, I think your 'friends' are being absolute assholes, I think they are embarrassed about it and are trying to hide it by blaming you. Ignore it or be a complete cow and put them in their place (my favorite option).

I take him inside to his mother who then complains that she needs a break as well and it's NYE and it was not fair that I wasn't watching her son and did not deal with the injury.

Really??

What did you say to that?

Who is messaging you? Do people really do that? Yanbu.

i couldn't be bothered with this rubbish to be honest, who cares what they wrote you know the truth as to what happened, block the morons and let it be.

Well, at least you know who the twats are in your social circle. This couple and anyone who messaged you - all twats. If I heard her story, first thing I'd know it's bollocks as who would offer to supervise someone else's kids on nye?! Anyone messaging you must know this is bs and they're just wading in.

I don't think I'd apologise for her ds's injury - what if she starts thinking she wants compensation and thinks you've admitted fault?

You all sound as if you're 12.
Block them and move on. Life is too short.

Post on your own Facebook about what a lovely party you had apart from the people who came with children when you'd specified no children, than left them unsupervised while they were drinking the alcohol others had brought because they brought none of their own.

yes I am in Australia. It is quite the norm here to BYO. I was getting messages (I blocked them apparently they are upset I blocked them) I have messaged back saying what actually happened.

Of course yanbu.

Who brought these freeloaders along?

sorry that should say messages from randoms I don't know because apparently I neglected their child as he got hurt

some people DP has known his whole life. I do not know why he still talks to them tbh (yes I am probably unreasonable there) because they act very entitled and seem to make their own rules up. DP had spoken to them that day when they rang to let him know they were on their way (they live an hour away) and did not mention anything about bringing others. Then when they turned up four extra people I did not know (DP knew one of them only) and two toddlers were with them. I was a bit taken aback as I was not expecting it.

Why would they treat you like a nanny at your own party Breathtaking entitled behavior and I hate that phrase but it applies here!

Even if you had been expecting it, who the hell goes to someone else's 'do' and expects them to watch their child? Who?? Cannot believe some people and their bloody nerve. I'd have written on the post they put on fb and put a screen shot of your invite saying your child/ren were not there and no kids invited and given them a right roasting for slagging you off like they have - damn nerve of them!

because apparently I neglected their child as he got hurt

I'd be pointing out to everyone the only people who neglected the child were the parents themselves. If they wanted you to supervise the DC they should have asked rather than assumed - especially as you'd told them not to bring the DC in the first place.

Just block them on fb. I dont like the whole tit for tat i see on fb. Who cares. Badmouthing on fb shows the bad mouther in a bad light only. Why did you allow them in anyway. Distrance yourself from the person who bought them.

I would prob resp on fb visible to all
You weren't invited, neither were your kids in fact we specifically said no kids to those who were invited, I never agreed to supervise anyone and you need to take responsibility for your own kids

Then block and delete.

Probably not the best advice but it would make me feel better!

I fucking would post on Facebook and set them damned straight.

AND detail out the crappy messages I'd had from the unknowns.

Then block them.

Who gives a toss what any of them thinks, you'll never have anything to do with any of them again.

My mouth fell open at this.

I'm with the "block the idiots" brigade. If anyone you know and care about asks you about the story you can fill them in, but otherwise, move on.

YANBU.

To the point of the dog, you're totally correct. I wouldn't leave toddlers unsupervised with a dog no matter how old. Even the friendliest dog could potentially snap especially in the company of a child it's unfamiliar. My children and dog are used to each other but toddlers who are not usually around dogs could unintentionally push them too far.

I would never rock up to a party uninvited especially not without bringing my own drink (plus a bottle for the host).

These people sound bonkers & you should block then and move on. The people who were at the party know the truth & that's what matters.