To be annoyed with parents allowing their "just walking " toddlers to wander aimlessly

[Ab1000]

When I'm on my lunch break I'm always in a rush to get stuff done. It's so annoying when parents allow their kids to toddle around and get in everyone's way. I have two children so I do know what it's like but mine were either on reins or had a hand firmly held.

[M0stlyHet]

Funnily enough I manage to get to work on time without whinging about people who are less mobile than me. You just walk round small children, infirm adults, elderly people. (I'm touchy about this because my mother spent several decades with an invisible disability - arthritis in her spine - being buffeted by arseholes in a rush because she couldn't step nimbly to one side while they went about their oh-so-important business). Suggesting that you can't is the pedestrian equivalent of car drivers who insist that they have to cut up cyclists because to wait, ooh, 3 seconds for a safe place to pass would make them late. Roads are busy. Pavements are busy. Take this into account. And yes, you are self-righteous and self-important if you think your needs trump everyone else's

[MontePulciana]

So you'd all be delighted if your tube carriage was full of giant buggies at rush hour? Yawn. I'll take my toddler where I need to go. He won't go on reins. If he's in your way, walk around. We don't have this problem where I live. You sound stressed out about it OP. Move somewhere less congested.

[GinIsIn]

I don't think my needs trump everyone else's, I think everyone should show common sense and manners, and appreciate that we have to share the same space. The West End in rush hour is not a nursery and it's disrespectful to other people who also have needs to use it as such.

[KERALA1]

Dh and I ttc our first and were sitting on some steps in central London. A toddler ran up behind us and in between us and gave us both a massive hug, one arm around each of us. Was so sweet. I got pg shortly after and fancifully think it was some sort of sign.

[wizzardMerlin]

I've actually stopped going out to avoid this. My DS is 20months and he will not sit still, even on chairs etc. He screams blue murder in his pushchair, so I can't have him screaming places down. I also have a baby to look after.


The result? 3 weeks of staying in the house, unless it's baby group, soft play, or going to the cemetery across the road where my nans buried (I let him walk on reins here as its really quiet). I'm ready to go insane!

[M0stlyHet]

So, Fenella, what do you suggest a woman who has a toddler that she has to get to nursery on her own way to work does? Teleports? People may actually be travelling with toddlers at rush hour because they too need to, not for the shits n' giggles and sheer entertainment value of pissing off other commuters.

Sorry, don't want to turn this into singling out you in particular, just you replied to me. But I'm pretty bloody shocked by the level of intolerance on this thread. It's not surprising the British have the reputation they have for being one of the most child-unfriendly nations in the world. I sometimes think the average Brit despises all children except their own (and sadly in some circs barely tolerates their own).

[M0stlyHet]

Oh Wizzard, don't feel you have to put yourself under house-arrest. There are people out there like me and Kerala who actually like toddlers and will understand that you have to take them out to let off steam, and to discover the world.

[toomuchtooold]

YABU. The world's full of people who can't walk that fast. You're a fit adult - shouldn't you be able to accommodate them, rather than the other way round?

[Tiniti]

Not sure why their is a floating ! at the end of my post. !

[GinIsIn]

Mostly something really revolutionary.... you know, like put it on reins or carry it up the bloody stairs....

[IWantATardis]

I'd agree that toddlers should be holding hands or on reins in crowded places and busy streets - but more from a safety point of view than a holding faster people up point of view.

It worries me when I see adults walking ahead and a toddler trailing behind in those kind of scenarios because i think what if the toddler trailing behind or wandering off to the side steps into the road, or wanders off to look at something interesting and gets lost etc.....

But as for holding busy people up because they're slow? Unless the toddler's taking up all the space weaving around, or stood still and refusing to move, does it really make that much difference having to step around them? Shouldn't we try to be a bit patient about a toddlers slow walking speed, just as we should try to be patient about an elderly or disabled adult having a slower walking speed?

Plus these slower pedestrians may very well be out and about taking up pavement space because they have things to do and places to go as well, rather than just getting in the way for fun.

[Mammylamb]

Some folk are awfully self important on here!

[alezas]

I feel like that sometimes too wizzard. It makes me wish that I lived in another country where children are welcome everywhere. It would be lovely to venture further afield that pizza express without risking a mumsnet post from someone who was inconvenienced by my young children!

[MyWhatICallNameChange]

It's not the slowness that bothers me - I'll just walk around them. It's when the parents don't hold the hand of a toddler that's just started walking so the baby is wandering aimlessly all over the place and you don't know if you go to walk round them if they'll veer over and you'll end up falling over them. Happened to me the other day when I nearly fell over a kid in a busy shopping centre at Christmas. But it was so cute! Not when I've knocked them flying because you cba holding their hand in huge crowds of people.

And best not get me started on parents who let their kids use their scooters in shops, shopping centres and museums.

[FeralBeryl]

MyWhatICall that's exactly what I meant - some people are spectacularly misinterpreting my post about school run without actually reading it. The design of our entrance means it is unfeasible for a wanderer. We have many parents who use mobility aids, many elderly carers collecting, of course non of these people cause an issue as they are adults with a sense of direction
I had 3 under 4, I'm very aware of toddling as non of them would entertain a buggy.
It's not the toddling - it's the unwillingness by SOME parents to guide them in a safe, unobstructive direction.
Of course they should bloody walk, how else will they learn.
What they shouldn't do is block 50 children and parents with no possibility of getting around them without knocking the toddler over. Likewise frighten elderly people or those with mobility issues that they may stray in front of them causing a fall.
It's completely doable. You don't need reins, if it's safe you don't even need to hold their hand, just guide them - as I said, think Lemmings if you are old enough to remember the game and everyone will be happy and safe.

[Copyandpaste111]

Just slow down a bit. Whatever you think is so important really isn't

[DownWithThatSort0fThing]

Yknow what I don't like, parents who let their kid wonder so far away from them, say 12 foot, and the only way to get past is to walk in between parents and child - that makes me feel uncomfortable

very shit parenting - keep a hold of your toddlers

[DownWithThatSort0fThing]

I wouldn't have dared let mine wonder off, poor little James Bulger had only just happened and people were very wary back then

[MadHattersWineParty]

Copyandpaste you cannot dictate to people what is important to them and what isn't. Should I 'slow down' and be late my hospital appointment, or just forgoe being punctual to work, or keep a friend waiting?

No I bloody won't! It's really not too much to ask to be able to get through your day without having to indulge little Johnny climbing up the stairs at Piccadilly bloody Circus on a weekday morning. And no it's not always possible to 'just get past', actually.

I'm not 'intolerant' of children either. I am intolerant of parents indulging every whim and not being aware of other people around them though.

[DownWithThatSort0fThing]

Whatever you think is so important really isn't

This is working under the assumption people are rushing for non consequential reasons, which is not the case or people wouldn't do it.
A person could be rushing to be beside an ill relative, or just taken a call from the hospital to get there now as a relative is on their last legs and will die- you JUST DON'T KNOW WHY SOMEONE IS RUSHING, so is unfair to belittle other peoples struggles by saying this

On a more day to day level,
If you are risking being late for work, you could lose your job, you could struggle to get another job and lose your house and become homeless, then become depressed and end up suicidal. Whilst that sounds OTT, being sacked is a realistic result for regular lateness

It is not great parenting if you allowed a 2-3 year old to roam around in busy areas, as a huge risk of getting hurt

[DownWithThatSort0fThing]

MadHattersWineParty agree

[MadHattersWineParty]

Seriously the sheer arrogance of telling people to slow down a bit as whatever they are rushing for can't be that important!!

[DownWithThatSort0fThing]

and the people comparing this to elderly, well that is hardly an issue we can get around is it - it is not the same at all

These children have parents, responsible adults, who SHOULD be looking after their best interests, rather than assume the general public will do so

[PotatoWaffleCob]

Oooh my first . Small children learning to walk and old people struggling to walk annoy you? Leave the house earlier. I'm a SAHM at the moment - do you object to me shopping at lunch time too? Is that an inconvenience for you? With my preschooler and buggy? After all, I could go any time in theory. What time would suit you best? Fuck, sometimes I take my elderly father too.

[DownWithThatSort0fThing]

People really need to realize that their child is not the centre of everyone elses universe.