To be annoyed at DH

[Wonderland22]

So, DH has a nasty viral infection which he's been off work with. We have 2 DC (aged 3 and 7 months) who I have been taking care of for the past week to allow him to rest. When he's felt up to it for the odd hour here & there he has helped out but I've been doing the bulk to allow him to sleep.

Today I'm having a tough day. 7mo is teething badly and not herself, refusing to sleep, won't go in jumperoo, will basically scream the house down if I don't hold her.

DH has been in bed a lot of the day but up for an hour or so this morning.

After realising that the only thing we have in the house for dinner will require quite a lot of cooking, which will mean DD2 being very distressed while I cook, I decided on a takeaway. I literally look like I've been dragged through a busy backwards today as I haven't been feeling great myself either. My hair is still wet from my shower, I have mascara under my eyes and I have a baby glued to me so it's pretty impossible to make myself presentable.

I went upstairs to DH and asked him if he could possibly answer the door to the local delivery man as I'd be mortified to be seen like this. His response; "are you having a laugh???"

I just feel frustrated. He works away often and we don't have family nearby. I know he's not well but I've been unwell numerous times over the years, sickness bugs, viral infections and I've had no choice but to carry on being a mum and finding a way through the day often without a single person to help, hard though that is. If I was ill and someone said they'd take care of my 3 year old and tired, teething 7 month old and let me sleep but could I just answer the door once, I'd think I'd hit the jackpot. Maybe I'm being unreasonable so please tell me if I am being. DH is normally great and does so much around the house etc but in this instance, I just know things would be different if it was me who was ill.

I believe the nature of the request does matter as whilst the OP has explained more about why her appearance matters to her, it doesn't seem like a great reason to get someone up from their sick bed.

rookie trust me there have been about a hundred other things today that I bet you would have deemed acceptable reasons to wake up DH but I've struggled through. I know how odd that request must seems to others but I've had such a tough day with the kids, which my husband knows, and he also knows the personal issues I have and my insecurities. Any other day and I'd have cooked the meal or brushed my hair & popped some foundation on but i didn't want to upset my already upset child even more. In the grand scheme of the day I've had, it was one small thing I asked of him.

I've been ill since Xmas Eve (tonsillitis and then a chest infection and then a pulled muscle in my back from my cough which had me on codeine for 3 days) but even at my worst I did more than answer the fucking door.

That's the point crunchy he's definitely milking it!

Given your issues and that you've been doing everything else so he can rest, yanbu. It'll take him two minutes.

The delivery driver really won't care if you answer it looking rough though.

I don't think you're being unreasonable op, I think your DP is a bit selfish. My DP was hospitalised a couple of years ago with pneumonia and was really ill. But at no time was he unable to answer the bloody door!

If I was ill enough to need to stay in bed I'd be raging if dh suggested I get up to answer the door. Equally though, if I was that sick I'd not be wanting to eat anything. Which is he?