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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To ask how much you spend on your DC's birthday?

79 replies

MrsStinkey · 06/01/2017 14:44

DD1 is 6 soon and I'm just thinking about presents for her birthday. She got a really good Christmas although she didn't ask for very much she got the things she asked santa for plus a few extras from DH and I then an absolute mountain of presents from my DM and DDad, DG and DSis and DBil. DH and I have decided this year we're cutting back as we have a small loan we'd like to repay and then saving to buy another house in a couple of years time. Anyway what I really want to know is how much to people budget for their DC's birthdays? We've said no party this year as we did that last year and it cost a fortune but she can go for dinner at Brewers fayre (her favourite) with a school friend which we'll pay for then we can buy her a present/some presents. What do you all spend on birthdays?

OP posts:

SingingSandwich · 06/01/2017 22:44

As other posters have said, it really depends on what they really want/need for presents so I don't tend to have a budget. I wouldn't ordinarily spend more than £100 on presents though and £150 on a party. My eldest has asked for books, tickets to Harry Potter studios, books, a packet of BluTac, books and a reading chair for her birthday this month!

The kids tend to take it in turns to have a 'big' party and on the years they're not having one they'd have maybe a trip to the cinema and lunch out with a couple of friends instead, or a sleepover or pamper type party at home.

My eldest also likes to go on the yearly orchestra residential, which is fairly pricey so that always gets taken into account when buying her birthday gifts.

kimann · 06/01/2017 23:25

We don't have a budget per se - we buy her things through the year so she doesn't really need/want much. Last Christmas we probably spent £100-£200 on her. This year we might have a party for a few of her friends and I think will budget for about £500 - cost of venue and food etc.

treaclesoda · 06/01/2017 23:30

Somewhere in the region of £30 generally. Although last year dd got a bike, but that was probably a one off.

jamdonut · 07/01/2017 00:30

£30 to £50 on gifts. Now they are all adult ( well two are, one is 16) we go out for dinner, too, which will be another £60 - £80.
I don't think that's a mean amount.

FuckingHateRats · 07/01/2017 20:17

Mine get one present, and within reason their request for this gift is granted. Some years we've spent £100, other years £20 as they asked for something inexpensive. But I always make a cake, we do birthday pancakes for breakfast with candles etc, and they get a day out with family if it's the weekend, or an after school birthday tea with pals if it's a midweek birthday.

The piles of presents and hundreds of pounds people spend makes me feel a bit ill. Consumerism at its worst.

Foxedme · 07/01/2017 20:19

I'd say about £75-80? They have birthdays straight after Christmas and they go a lot from family and extended family anyway. Plus we always do a pretty good party and often a trip out. Luckily we haven't reached the stage where they want electronic techy stuff but it won't be long! In the summer I might treat them to garden/beach toys so I'd rather save my cash for that.

Thingiebob · 07/01/2017 20:23

My girl is seven next week and is getting a Baby Alive doll at £65, which I think is a horrific amount for a bloody doll. She'll also get a few cheap pressies to unwrap, think pound shop! She's Gavin a few friends over for a party at home. The food, prizes and homemade cake will come to about £30. I still feel this is a lot of money.

BillyNotQuiteNoMates · 07/01/2017 20:42

No more than £50 for a present, and up to £100 for a good party
Totally 😱 At some of the numbers being posted on here!

dotdotdotmustdash · 07/01/2017 20:44

My Dc are both January birthdays so there isn't another payday after Christmas in time for their birthays! When they were younger I think I generally spent £40-50 on a gift or two and each had a meal and movie/bowling night with a handful of friends.

HarryPottersMagicWand · 07/01/2017 20:51

£100 on presents and I don't count things like clothes, shoes or bedroom furniture and this is stuff you would buy them anyway.

Party varies. Last year we took DS to Harry Potter Studio Tour so after petrol and hotel, added up to quite a bit but that was a one off really. DD went bowling and we found a deal as it was a weekday so was less than £50 for 8 of them with food. This year DD is having a class party which is coming to about £130-£140 which is for over 30 children. Sometimes we have had a party at home with some food and games and an ipod on so dirt cheap. I never count the cost of a party in with presents and I don't have a set budget for it, depends what they did the year before or what the other is having as they have birthdays close together. I think there is only a certain amount of birthdays that they will have parties anyway and they are only young once so I like to make the most of it and make it as special as possible.

kittymamma · 07/01/2017 21:03

Wow!

When I was a kid, my mum had a limit of £20 for a gift, that was it. No party. Christmas was £100 each.

With my own DD, I have a mental limit of £120, but that includes the party and cake or day out. I have told her this. She can have a smaller party and a more expensive gift or she can blow it all on a great party. She wanted the party last year. She is also 6 this year. At Christmas, this year we spend 150, but our limit was supposed to be £100.

RhodaBorrocks · 07/01/2017 21:04

DS has got to an age where a party is just a few friends for an activity and food. Last 2 parties have worked out at under £100. Some years he doesn't have a party so will have a day out instead. Last year's legoland trip was pricier at over £100.

But generally if he has a party there are less presents from me. My usual present budget is £100 - £150. I'm a single parent and his dad hasn't bought him a gift in over a year so I feel I have to make up the shortfall. When XP was around I spent less as I was able to delegate some gifts to him.

GreenTureen · 07/01/2017 21:05

Ds2 is 9 in a couple of weeks. His party is costing £165...we're going to a trampoline park (him, ds2 and 8 friends) followed by a Pizza Hut.

Present wise, he's having a guitar which we've not bought yet but planning around £40ish. And a couple of other bits to open (and I do mean bits)...so maybe £60 total.

Other expenses are party bags (£25ish) and cake (£25ish for ingredients, dh makes it). We also always go out for a meal on their actual birthday, to somewhere of their choosing - but I don't really count this as a birthday expense because we probably eat out once a month anyway, we just arrange that months for the birthday day.

So in total about £275 on everything birthday related....I think this is probably pretty standard year on year for both dc.

Funnyfarmer · 07/01/2017 21:10

My 2 dd's birthdays are right on top of Christmas as well. If we do partys for them we don't buy them presents. The party is there present. I buy them a new part outfit though. This year neither of them wanted partys so we decided on a shopping trip in the day and a meal out with a couple of there closest freinds that we would pay for. We spent about £300 hundred on Dd1 but it was her 16th we don't usually spend that much and about £150 on Dd2 that includes money for the meals. I know that balance seems really unfair but as I said it was a big birthday for Dd1 and her clothes and bits are just alot more expensive. Also can't order of the kids menu for Dd1 and her freinds and Dd2 gets a lot of money of other family members that Dd1 doesn't get because she has a different Df

belgina · 07/01/2017 21:11

We spend £30-50. I don't consider it mean. They always get what they asked for and they never ask for much.

RonaldMcDonald · 07/01/2017 21:12

Honestly? It depends, of course
From about £40 for a home disco and some pizza to £500 for a pony day for my daughter to spend the day at the stables and then have a long hack out

notasausage · 07/01/2017 21:32

We usually give the "big ticket" items for birthdays ( bike, iPad, Scooter etc) plus a party at £100-150. There is no particular budget but I don't aim for a massive pile of presents - that's what Christmas is for. Spend what you can afford. I have come to realise there is no norm.

bellie710 · 07/01/2017 21:52

We don't have budgets for Xmas or Birthdays just get them what they need or want. It has to be what you can afford to spend, my kids all compete so always need equipment that can cost from £5 - £500, when family ask what to get I always give them a list of practical things not toys. This year instead of a party I am taking DD1 to London to Harry Potter which will cost more than a party but much less hassle!

PandoraMole · 07/01/2017 21:56

I think that sounds fine. Tbh at that age it's more about the fuss than the money. Pretty Wrapping paper, a helium balloon, banner, cake, table confetti on the birthday dinner table.

When DD was that age, I probably spent £50-£75 on presents and about £100-150 on a party/celebration but that would depend on the nature of what she wanted (and of course what I could afford).

One year she moved into the bigger bedroom which was redecorated, carpeted, had a new bed etc. That year she just had 3 mates for a sleepover.

When she had her guinea pigs, they and all the kit were a joint pressie from us and her GPs, so no other presents and just a cheap Saturday morning pictures and pizza get together with a couple of friends.

OTOH, when she was 10 there wasn't anything specific she wanted gift wise, and as it was double figures we did a more elaborate party for more people.

She's 13 this year...for the first time ever I have no clue what to do with her!

JuneBalloon · 07/01/2017 21:58

Wow... my DC's get a crappy deal compared to some! £50 on presents from us plus a small £10-£15 present from their sibling (which we pay for). DS usually wants a family day out (no particular budget as we all benefit and don't generally do much at the weekends normally) whereas DD likes to have a few friends over for tea and a sleepover...

thedcbrokemybank · 07/01/2017 22:04

It really depends on what they ask for. This year my dd (4) had a party which was £90 and got an Elsa doll as a present plus a few other small bits so probably £140 in total. DD (9) had approx £50 presents, a sleepover with friends and a meal with family so about £100 in total. Next year she wants a laptop though so that will probably be £150+ but she won't have a party. Spend what you can afford on what she wants.

Piratefairy78 · 07/01/2017 22:07

We do either a party or a large present. Their birthdays are a while off yet but DC11 will probably ask for a large box of Lego, Xbox games and a family day out, DC9 will ask to go shopping on the day and have a sleepover with 2-3 friends and pizza and DC7 will want the largest party she can get away with!!! All will cost about the same and all with have a great time.

questioningitall · 07/01/2017 22:59

God we spend too much that's for sure. This year for DS a bike, bits and bobs, Star Wars costume, Star Wars Lego and other stuff around £300? Plus a party for 15 friends at about £300.

His birthday is 1st Jan though and I'm always keenly aware it's so close to Christmas he needs more of a fuss to make it feel special. My dad was is early Jan and said no one even used to remember and he always got joint xmas and bday presents. I always thought that was so sad.

bonfireheart · 07/01/2017 23:03

DD gets presents throughout the year. She isn't fussed about stuff but she likes trips to the theatre, stays in hotels etc so as her birthday falls in half term we usually go away for her birthday.

JaceLancs · 07/01/2017 23:06

£100 to £150 but all my DC are adults
We celebrate with a meal out, takeaway or family party depending on how broke I am

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