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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To ask has anyone been sterilised and regretted it?

17 replies

Jennyfromthehood · 04/01/2017 22:22

Or partner has been sterilised and regretted it?

I've got 2 kids, I don't want anymore. I would like to be sterilised as I don't get on with any forms of contraception except condoms.

My friends say I will regret it, that I may yearn for a child in a few years, that I may split with with my DH and want more with another man?

So has anyone done it and regretted it?

OP posts:

SeamstressfromTreacleMineRoad · 04/01/2017 22:31

I was sterilised at 35, after having two DC - best thing I ever did... . I've never regretted it for a moment.

Original poster

Jennyfromthehood · 04/01/2017 22:34

Is it painful?

OP posts:

rollonthesummer · 04/01/2017 22:34

Do they do a sterilisation as a day stay? Is it painful afterwards?

AlisonS13 · 04/01/2017 22:42

22 years ago I was sterilised as a day case and had mild discomfort for about 24 hours.
I just set up my bedroom with TV, and a supply of tea and biscuits and I was fine the next day.

AlisonS13 · 04/01/2017 22:43

Also, I never once regretted it.
In fact it took a lot of troubles with contraception methods away.

aprilanne · 04/01/2017 22:48

i was sterilised 16 ears ago when youngest son a baby ,i severely regret it .my periods were all over the shop for years and i have been yearning another baby badly .now to old at 46 but i wish i had another baby after number 3 .it was a bit painfull but recovered quickly .

Sweetpea80 · 04/01/2017 22:50

I was sterilised during a c-section 12 years ago. My marriage then broke down but remarried last month.
My DD turned one last month too so I def regretted it as we had to go through IVF privately to have her.
Only you know if it's right for you. At the time I thought it was the right choice but you never know what the future holds for you.

Prompto · 04/01/2017 22:50

A family member decided to get sterilised on the basis that he and his wife already had three children and didn't want any more. She was going to get it done but he volunteered because it was a less invasive procedure. Two years later she decided that, actually, she did want another baby after all. They couldn't get it reversed on the NHS and couldn't afford to go private so she left him in order to be able to have more children with a new partner (his best friend it turns out, they had two children together). He met a new partner too but they couldn't have children together and it caused a lot of tension.

Obviously that's an extreme case but it's something to consider.

DH is going for the snip, hopefully some time this year. Physically I can't have any more children, it would be far too high risk, and DH doesn't want any more children regardless of what happens in future so even if we split up and met new partners there'd be no more children.

HelsBels5000 · 04/01/2017 22:54

I was sterilised during c-section with DC3. I've since had laser ablation done to cure my ridiculously heavy periods, so I'm doubly sterile if you like! I still yearn for another baby.......

Steamgirl · 04/01/2017 22:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CharlieSierra · 04/01/2017 22:59

I was sterilised at 31 during my 3rd C section. I haven't regretted it from the point of having more children but I did have an early menopause and was told that tubal ligation may have been a contributing factor. I think opinions on this differ, but the doctor who said it was shocked I hadn't been warned.

BoneyBackJefferson · 04/01/2017 23:03

I know males that have regretted it due it going wrong and being in constant pain.
A few that that have regretted it because they then split up as the partner wanted more kids.
And a a couple of men that regret it as there partners pressured them into doing it and then left them.

user1480946351 · 04/01/2017 23:14

Wasn't sterilised but DP was. Best thing we ever did, was great for our relationship...loads more sex, no worries about yet another pregnancy (we have several children but lots more losses).
Can't imagine ever regretting it. When you know, you know, I think?

CH338339 · 08/10/2018 17:24

A little late but I wanted to share my experience. I was looking for reviews before my sterilisation and it seems people only post the bad stuff!
I had a laparoscopy sterilisation last Thursday, it’s Monday now, so 4 days ago. Got to hospital at 12.30pm, had the operation at 3.30pm and was on my way home at 7.30pm. Woke up in a little pain, had some morphine and was fine after that. They warn about shoulder pain from the gas but I didn’t have any. The only discomfort I’ve suffered is constipation! I’ve a couple of tiny bruises on my tummy. The scars are so small, one in my belly button and one on my pubic hair line. Both have just 1 stitch and are smaller than my little finger nail. So glad I’ve had it done.

Jimdandy · 08/10/2018 17:42

My hubby had the snip at the age of 24 (I don’t think they should have done it to be honest, but that’s another story) met me, who wanted children and had none (we met when I was 25 and he was 29).

He had the snip reversed privately and we’ve got 2 children. I got sterilised after the second one.

I’ve never regretted it. I went through all circumstances and decided no matter what my mental health etc could not cope with another baby. (I find my 2 children a struggle even now). I do get broody for a couple of minutes, but then reality sets in!!

Ratonastick · 08/10/2018 17:48

Slightly extreme case, but I had to have a hysterectomy at 36. Severe health issues for years and no alternative options left. I thought I would be troubled and upset by it, no more kids, etc. It was actually the best thing that could have happened, I do get the odd twinge of longing for another baby but only the odd twinge. However, no more pain, worry about accidental pregnancy, etc. It is extraordinarily freeing.

possumgoddess · 08/10/2018 18:43

I was sterilised at 28 after 2 children and a miscarriage. I have never regretted it for a second despite having divorced and married again. I knew I didn't want to have any more children with anyone.

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