To feel scared about stopping breastfeeding.

[Skatingonthinice16]

I had to express as for various reasons couldn't feed dd properly myself. She was exclusively breastmilk fed to six months before starting solids. She's now one and I'm still expressing every four hours which is really every three and a half hours as if I express at 2am it takes half an hour and then I have to be up at 6am to do it again. We also can't go out for long unless I express in the car which I don't really like doing. Dh has been massively unsupportive and I'm finding it harder and harder looking after a mobile baby and an older dc and expressing.

I know I have to stop but I'm worried that when I stop dd will get ill more often and not recover from things as quickly. Is it likely to make much difference? Dc1 was only fed for five months but was an altogether healthier baby than dd - he had none of the problems she did at birth.
Did people notice their babies getting ill more often once they'd stopped feeding? Dd won't be going to nursery. It's also such a bad time of year for germs, I'm tempted to keep going until April / may but my mental health has suffered enormously and so has my relationship with dc1.

The expressing has kind of been a crutch though. I feel like it helps dd even if it's probably making no difference. I feel very anxious about stopping.

Should I just accept that it needs to finish now?

[breastfeeding] should make life easier not difficult.

Never a truer word spoken.

When the effort taken to give your baby breastmilk is ruining your quality of life to this extent, after a year of incredible effort, then it's not beneficial on balance any longer.

You pump 30oz a day and your DD is a year old? That is a huge amount!!! Well done.

kellymom.com/bf/pumpingmoms/pumping/milkcalc/

There's no need to pump at night at this age. What kind of a pump do you have? If you wanted to invest in a more powerful pump, it might be beneficial. Also, there's a new pump available on the market. I haven't tried it myself but it's gotten great reviews - it's called a Haakaa and is less than 20 quid on Amazon. They have a Facebook page - HaakaaUK. Women seem to get a lot of milk expressed from it with no effort.

Contacting LLL would give you support.

I expressed for my twins and have recently stopped, they got plenty of winter bugs, colds etc before I stopped and it has made no difference. In the long run I am sure their immunity will be great, but it isn't the only way it's built. We have had three solid months of illness and they were still feeding for two of those. Give yourself a break. I read when researching expressing etc that babies need only 3oz of breastmilk a day to get the immunological benefits of breastmilk so you could easily cut it back to expressing way less and them still gain the benefits if this is a compromise for you? Well done, you've done an amazing job, especially without support.

Wow, you've done amazingly!! I'm still bf my nearly year old, we had a few struggles until he was 5 months and I stubbornly kept it up and am so glad I did, but there's no way I could have expressed for as long as you have. I can understand your concerns but after a year I think you can safely wean without worrying about any adverse effects - and enjoy having more time to spend with your dc.

I was speaking to my mum last night about weaning as I'm wondering whether it's time for us to stop bf. She said the one of her children she managed to bf (my middle sister) got sick more often than either of the other two, and we were formula fed. I think there are a lot of factors and as a second child you'll probably find your ds does get sick more as he'll catch stuff off his sister, but don't read into that if you do stop giving bm!

Oops - switch ds for dd and sister for brother!!

Wow OP expressing for a year and through the night is amazing. I lasted a few months and it drove me mad - and I didn't pump at night. We moved fully to formula by 5 mo this as I couldn't take it anymore.

I think by 12 months you can cut down (not necessarily give up if you don't want to). DD can have a cup of cows milk if she'll drink it, but 30 oz a day is a lot of milk for a one year old.

I have heard that bf is useful for toddlers etc in getting fluids in when they are ill, but I assumed this is more about the method of delivery than the milk itself? Presumably your DD is bottle fed and so if she's not well is just as likely to drink a bottle or cup of whatever milk she normally drinks?

You have done brilliantly. Get some real ice help with moving on.

Is dh just unsupportive about this or about a lot of things?

I managed 9-10 months of this with both of mine (the expressed milk lasted till they were 1). To this day I don't know how. The alarms and the fenugreek capsules and the cleaning and sterilising and expressing in toilets and on planes and in the back of the car. (I drew the line at expressing in the middle of a relative's wake.)

So well done to you. You've done brilliantly.

A child's immune system and general health is about far more than milk though. They will catch bugs and be poorly. There's no way to avoid that. But every cold builds immunity.

Do whatever you need to to be kind to you.

LLL might be able to help you move to the breast directly rather than expressing if that's something you're interested in. It can be easier once they are older.

However I 100% agree with PP who say it won't make any difference at this age. You're okay to stop. You've done so much.