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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Before or AFTER lunch for present opening?

118 replies

38cody · 25/12/2016 00:30

MIL here now, staying over ready for lunch tomorrow.
Younger DC were excited and I talked them through the plan for tomorrow including santa's stocking gifts when they wake up then play, bath, breakfast etc. Lunch then under the tree presents after lunch.
MIL said she's always opened all gifts first thing.
I like to spread it out so there's more to look forward to after lunch.
Of course we're doing it my way. Wondering what the popular consensus is?

OP posts:

bimbodoc · 26/12/2016 16:20

We do what my friend calls "tantric present opening" 1 or 2 an hour throughout the day, there is only myself and my 9 year old and we both like this arrangement as it's a great way to have a mellow day. As a kid we opened everything first thing with parents, but as I have no good memories of childhood Christmases I wanted to make our own traditions as a break with the past. We also do being nice to each other, no arguments and a Christmas day run. I love Xmas now.

CoconutAmericano · 26/12/2016 16:25

Everything opened first thing in our house

cardibach · 26/12/2016 16:28

All in the morning - stocking in bed with a cuppa, tree presents after that. I don't understand the view that all the fun is iver once they are open - there's lovely food, presents to look at/play with and family all together having a laugh. my ex ILs did the 'tantric' thing. Drove me mad the year we were with them!

NavyandWhite · 26/12/2016 16:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

soundsystem · 26/12/2016 17:48

bimbodoc I love "tantric present opening". I'm stealing the name, thank you! That's what we do, and it works for us, but my extended family take the piss (we also did everything first thing as kids and I found it quite overwhelming - I like having time to look at/play with things as I go along!)

CountessOfStrathearn · 26/12/2016 19:44

"Tantric present opening" I love it! That's what we do too. In fact, we were still opening some today (it wasn't as if there were a huge number either) and there are still some under the tree that the children haven't asked to open yet, so we'll do the last remaining few tomorrow morning. Between stockings first thing, breakfast, church, (a light) lunch, playing with the toys, a film, proper Christmas dinner, games, then bedtime for the little ones, there's really not that much time anyway.

When we were growing up, all the presents were opened in a rush first thing and then had to be admired and not used or not played with but kept For Another Day or For A Special Occasion, so I am deliberately letting them play with things as we go along.

That said, mine are still little so we'll see how it develops as they get older. It works for us right now though.

Kittykatmacbill · 26/12/2016 21:40

Children Stockings (which are from Santa) before breakfast, then out for walk / playpark / church, then home for something bubbly or sherry for main presents which are from which ever family bought them not Santa. Then Christmas dinner which is roughly lunchtime (one or twoish) then other presents and adults stockings whose origins are not explain...

Can't get my head round this all presents from Santa thing...

FunnysInLaJardin · 26/12/2016 23:51

at the moment DH has this getting up early and opening all your gifts thing on Christmas day. DS1 said he wants to enjoy his gifts and open them slowly, so next year it will be more like my own families christmas,

Father Christmas gifts, breakfast at about 10am and then main tree gifts. Lunch at about 3pm.

Will suit me much better.

Weirdly DH has this thing about how early were we/his friends up to open their gifts. He is 50 but has the mind of a 5 yo

FunnysInLaJardin · 26/12/2016 23:54

bim I do that and get laughed at. I keep all my gifts and savour them, opening them slowly. DS1 is developing the same habit and asked that DS2 stop handing him presents as he wanted to enjoy what he had

FunnysInLaJardin · 26/12/2016 23:57

I wonder if tantric present opening is an introverted kind of thing. My parents take it to another level mind you. I bet they haven't opened our gifts yet

Lesmacarons · 27/12/2016 08:03

My son is staying at his girlfriends parents house this year and my daughter is at home. We had the usual morning freeforall and then you can spend the rest of the day playing with whatever it is or just chilling out. My son rang - mortified - at 5 - not presents yet, no dinner.

Stepson rang yesterday to give us the full background to this story. Turns out my sons girlfriends parents are not just well off - but Downton Abbey rich. He didn't tell us - apparently the Queen does it this way too.

He still sounds as though he would prefer our Christmas, but we have all decided to go there next year if we are asked ;)

We are all, also, going to try to persuade him to marry her. My stepson seems most keen on this in the new year. :)

throwingpebbles · 27/12/2016 08:29

As a child we always strung it out, my parents would let us open a few, then a break. We wouldn't finish opening till the evening. I followed that with mine. But this year we had DSC too, DSD just started dishing them out and they were all opened first thing. It was actually a much nicer way of doing things, as then we spent the rest of the day playing with the toys/reading their new stories/ playing hide and seek etc. I'm totally converted now

yomellamoHelly · 27/12/2016 08:36

After lunch for us too (so about 2 pm). But dc get most of their presents from us in their "stocking" (read pillowcase!) which they can open when they like. Tend to put any computer games under the tree so they're forced to play board games / read / build stuff over Christmas morning. Then extended family and dh (who cooks the meal) tend to go to bed for a few hours in the afternoon and the dc can play their console games on the TV in peace. Works for everyone!

Stillwishihadabs · 27/12/2016 10:29

I was bought up in a "rip it all open house" dh not till after a) church, b) lunch and c) a walk.so.5pmish. Now we comprimise stocking 1st thing, then breakfast, church and walk, but then presents while "lunch" (eaten about 5pm) cooks.

Ibloodyhatethomasthetankengine · 27/12/2016 11:55

Always seemed a bit cruel to me that kids get so excited to see FC has 'been' but then they have to wait for hours on end to get to open the presents....... We've always been a 'get up and get stuck right in' family and spend the rest of the day playing with the toys. Appreciate everyone is different (although I don't know many people that DON'T do it like that) but just seems weird any other way

isittheholidaysyet · 27/12/2016 12:22

Santa sacks on waking (once everyone has been woken)
Breakfast
Dressed
Church
Dinner at 1.15ish
The Queen
Proper presents

If fr Christmas has done his job properly there should be plenty and stuff and chocolate to see the kids through till after dinner.

throwingpebbles · 27/12/2016 16:16

I just liked that the "tear them all open" approach actually made Christmas Day feel less dominated by presents and more about spending time together. We got on with playing the board games, building a Lego model together etc.
I'm a total convert after 30+ years of stringing out the presents.

notgettingyounger · 27/12/2016 16:50

When I was a child, we had stockings first thing, then presents after Church, so about midday. Then lunch. We then all had to stop whatever we were doing (sometimes still eating) and stand in silence for the duration of the Queen's Speech, my father saluting the National Anthem.

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