WWYD? Would you be offended?

[PonyPals]

Our neighbours across the street have 3 young kids and I think they are really struggling financially. The last couple of months there has been a soup van from Salvation Army outside their house.
I don't know them very well as they seem to keep to themselves but with Christmas coming I was thinking of wrapping up some presents and putting them by their door.
I bought 6 presents (2 each), wrapped them and put a sticky note describing what was inside so that the parents can decide who gets what.
It is now midnight (Australia) and I am thinking of sneaking across. My Dh thinks that it's not a good idea and they could be really offended.
WWYD?
I am not leaving my name, it is anonymous. Would you be offended?

Interesting take bill. By being anonymous they don't force the recipient to acknowledge the gift. And it can ne a 'thinking of you gift'. Whereas to lie to their face and say 'I have so much stuff I don't want it all. Here you can have it' would seem worse. And puts the recipient in an awkward position of accepting or refusing. But a gift on a door step can be ignored if so desired.

But that is my reading/emotional response

Such a lovely thing to do. Very thoughtful of you

I agree - an anonymous gift is so much less embarassing.
Face-2-face "Just happen to have these things the kids don't want" .... Akward to accept or reject in person

Are you sure the van wasn't there because one of them volunteers?

I'm in Oz too and I've never seen a van with Salvation Army soup kitchen on it outside someone's home! Surely they don't do that do they? It's very crass if they do. They should help people in a more subtle way.

I have just googled and those vans go to houses to collect donations...they don't really visit to deliver food.

What a wonderful thing you have done for them, definitely don't worry, they will be so grateful I'm sure.

Many years ago when I was a child, a family in our street lost the dad in an accident shortly before Christmas. It was a poor street in a poor area and they were one of the poorest families in it. They lived (as most of us did) from payday to payday - there was no slack to take up. The street collected to get each of the kids a selection box and an annual, and a chicken, veg, pudding etc so they had a Christmas.

It always stayed with me how people with not very much were prepared to give to people with nothing.

That's lovely OP. Merry Christmas!

Yes, they're street homeless outreach so the parents must be volunteers. Nice thought, but misguided.

I've seen 3 or 4 posts on fb this week (local parenting group) where someone has done what you have and it has been received with thanks.

Even if grey are volunteers for the charity they will find suitable homes for your lovely gifts.

I have delivered food parcels and children's gifts on behalf of the Salvation Army in the past and the recipients were nothing except completely thrilled and thankful. This was in some really rough areas and I have to admit that as I set out after dark on Christmas Eve, I did wonder how we'd be received, but it was lovely. No-one showed any sign of offense.

Do agree though, the presence of the van probably means they're volunteers rather than that they're needy. That said, one of our most hard working volunteers this Christmas is homeless himself. Has been serving food and wrapping gifts all day, then going back to his tent

If they are volunteers, they'll know what to do with the presents, so still a lovely thing.

I think that's a beautiful idea! I feel quite teary having read this

That happened to me this week, sort of I had been signed up to receive Christmas presents and a food parcel from a local community charity. I was very, very embarrassed because here it is quite middle class and with another mum donating cast off clothing when our income came up in conversation I feel very much like the Victorian pauper down the street with her urchin child, with all the well to do charitable sorts taking pity on us.
Still, the urchin has a veritable mountain of gifts to unwrap now

I did think that maybe they could be volunteers but when the van comes they set up outside of their house and hand food packs out - the whole family is outside. I have seen this van on another street. Think it might be St Vinnies.
I guess if they are volunteers than they would be appreciate and might pass it on to a family really in need.
Thanks everyone for your stories

when the van comes they set up outside of their house and hand food packs out - the whole family is outside.

Really?

In this day and age? That sounds positively Victorian!

I wouldn't. Even if you send it anonymously, assuming they wouldn't get nicked, it's awkward as hell knowing someone somewhere (and not santa bollocks) knows that we are struggling meanwhile i don't know anything about them. It's embarrassing. I'd be forever guessing and it would make me paranoid.
I'd send the money or gifts to a charity like the salvation army instead.

Finally, this whole van thing is weird. I'd think they are volunteers, too.

Satisfatory I can see you didn't read the thread. OP has already done it.

I agree with you though. I've had some pretty lean times and I'd be quite mortified if I found presents on my step. I'd also be a little bit worried as I had a stalker once.

user1477282676 depending on where in Australia the OP lives it literally could be Victorian.

Horupu lol...quite....but I don't think Vinnies or the Salvation Army turn up and set up Soup Kitchens on people's doorsteps...then hand out parecels to the assembled family.

It sounds like something out of bloody Oliver Twist!

Parcels not paracels....

Parts of Australia are still very dated.

Online shopping for example is still relatively new in Perth. Shops used to shut on a Sunday up until I moved back to the uk a few years ago. Online grocery shopping is still new.

I agree with Bill, although I see OP has done it.

It's very excessive as well, two each.

I think the OP has done a lovely thing and I for all emotional reading the thread (damn pregnancy hormones). Even if the family are volunteers rather than being needy they can decide that either someone wanted to do a food deed for them and accept the gifts or thatvhjeoe children have plenty and they can give the gifts on to a needy family through the Salvation Army. Either way those presents won't go to waste and some children who otherwise might not have presents will get something.

Kirri I shop online all the time...I live in South Australia...and it's considered pretty backwards here!

User, I did say a few years ago. Online shopping was non existent when I left. We were back in winter this year and it's marginally better.