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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To cancel Xmas plans because of poorly child?

23 replies

puglife15 · 23/12/2016 10:23

Baby has a high temp and is v unhappy. Going to see Dr shortly.

We're meant to be visiting family who live in the middle of nowhere. We live in a city near a hospital with great provision.

AIBU and precious thinking of staying at home?

OP posts:
UnicornInDMboots · 23/12/2016 10:24

How old is your baby?

Blossomdeary · 23/12/2016 10:27

See what doc says - ask whether it would be sensible to stay home.

But there are medical services in the middle of nowhere (I should know - married to part of those services!) but you may have to travel a bit. There are very few situations where immediate attention is required and doc will be able to advise whether those are a possibility.

Original poster
puglife15 · 23/12/2016 10:27

10 months. He's got a cold, cough, teething and dodgy tummy. Possible ear infection. He's crying and seems super unhappy.

OP posts:
GetTheeBehindMeSanta · 23/12/2016 10:30

See what the doctor says.

What do the family you're visiting think? Would they be relaxed about having a grumpy baby in the house?

Original poster
puglife15 · 23/12/2016 10:30

We won't have much fun going on a 2 hour plus journey with a poorly baby either.

Being a bit unfair really, the hospital is probably only 15-20 mins from them. I'm just used to being close - I can see our local children's hospital from our house!

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Original poster
puglife15 · 23/12/2016 10:31

That's a good point GetThee. They don't like being near people with colds. I think him waking a lot would be disruptive to evenings and meal times. Gah.

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Bluebolt · 23/12/2016 10:31

I would stay at home for containment reasons, and in case you have also been infected and to protect child from any new bugs.

GetTheeBehindMeSanta · 23/12/2016 10:32

Give them a ring now then. It sounds like you're decided on not going, so the more notice you can give them, the better.

SantasJockstrap · 23/12/2016 10:33

I would stay at home as it will all be easier for everyone

AHedgehogCanNeverBeBuggered · 23/12/2016 10:34

YABU if the hospital is your main concern, 15-20 minutes is nothing!

Sounds like you don't really want to go - you're an adult, you don't have to if you don't want to! Make sure you give notice though so your friends don't cook everything they've bought.

Hope your DS feels better soon Flowers

Gileswithachainsaw · 23/12/2016 10:36

I would stay home.

No one wants to be dragged here there and everywhere when they are ill. Best place for him. Is home.

Amd it's probably far better you remain home where you have the endless stash of bedding and access to washing machine etc not to mention the proximity to a supermarket where you can get medicine or whatever is the only food item he's eating etc

I really wouldn't do it to yourselves

lougle · 23/12/2016 11:02

I wouldn't cancel. It's unlikely you'll need a hospital.

MrsJayy · 23/12/2016 11:07

Sounds like you dont want to go which is fair enough if the baby is grumpy and ill see what Dr says maybe get an antibiotic for ear infection, yabu to not go because of the hospital though that is anxiety driven and not great for your mental health,

eatsleepfeedrepeat · 23/12/2016 11:12

We're you just going today for the day, or are you talking about actual Christmas? How disappointed will family be/ how big an impact would you not going have? Eg if you're visiting grand parents and it's just your family going I think it would be unfair to cancel unless actually in hospital! But big party at second cousin's mother in law's, just stay home

m0therofdragons · 23/12/2016 11:19

Dc bounce back so quickly. I'd give calpol and stick to plans but that's based on my Christmas with family where I could disappear upstairs with dc if needed.

FranHastings · 23/12/2016 11:20

I'd stay at home.

harderandharder2breathe · 23/12/2016 11:54

I would stay home not because of closeness to hospital Hmm but because I'd rather be in my own home with a poorly grumpy baby, not worrying about disturbing others

golfbuggy · 23/12/2016 12:03

When were you due to leave? If, say, not until Christmas Day, I'd give your hosts a heads up that baby is not well but wait until nearer the time to decide. Babies can often go from seemingly really poorly to right as rain in hardly any time at all.
15-20 minutes from hospital I imagine is average for most of the UK population!

Original poster
puglife15 · 23/12/2016 21:56

Thanks for your replies.

Baby still poorly, dr reckons it's one of the many yucky viruses doing the rounds but nothing to be treated eg no signs of ear or chest infection. We're giving him max doses of Calpol but he's still not happy and just wants to sleep on me.

We're going to see how things are tomorrow and make a call. We're due to be leaving in the morning. Booked on a specific bus and not sure we can change tickets / there's space on later ones...

Today's been a disaster, I'd planned to pack everything, finish wrapping presents, bake a cake etc and haven't managed any of it!

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Original poster
puglife15 · 23/12/2016 21:58

Oh and we've called hosts to warn them there's a chance we might have to bail. What's worse is that we'd split the food buying so we've actually got a bunch of food and drink here! Luckily it's stuff they can live without, not like we've got the turkey and sprouts.

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BIgBagofJelly · 23/12/2016 22:22

I think it depends who you're visiting. Would you feel awkward fussing over a screaming baby all day in their house? Would they rather not have a sick baby in their house? If it's doting grandparents that will be on hand to help and still give baby cuddles etc that's different from a big gathering of mainly childfree friends.

glueandstick · 23/12/2016 22:30

Ours is like that at the moment and it's life as normal. Just a lot more cuddling, carrying and crying. Lin car journeys are amazing as she can breath better propped up and sleeps the whole way.

I doubt you'd need a hospital. Don't give up on the trip yet.

Original poster
puglife15 · 24/12/2016 05:11

We are visiting close family, I doubt baby will let them have a look in cuddle wise though!. I'm sure they'd rather we were there even with an unhappy sick baby.

It won't be very relaxing but I think I'll just have to put him and me first over things like sitting down to dinner on time and mucking in with clearing up, cooking etc.

I just want to sit on the sofa in peace and quiet with baby and not have to stand on ceremony.

Glue we are going mostly on public transport (bus train taxi) no car journey for us.

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