One of our Christmas guests is vegetarian and only just told us

[AnnaleeP]

Christmas this year is just me and DH and a couple of close friends. When we invited them they said they had a friend coming to stay, would it be OK for them to come too? We said yes, that was 6 weeks ago. Since then we've sorted out what they're bringing food-wise.

Tonight DH gets a text 'will there be room for a tray of vegetarian sausages to go in the oven?' Errrr if the extra guest is vegetarian the time to mention this was 6 bloody weeks ago. I'd like to be able to serve the poor lady something a bit nicer than freaking Linda McCartney sausages for Xmas lunch so now we have to rethink what we were planning on serving. Obviously the vegetables with the main meal are OK but the starter was going to be fish and meat and there's quite a lot of meat involved in the main obvs. I'll have to make veggie gravy and different roasties for her. I dunno what to do for the main. DH is trying to get some answers out of them but so far it's 'oh don't go to any trouble, she'll just have sausages' - she's not having freaking sausages! Just tell me what she wants and I'll make it! Is it me? I'm just trying to be hospitable to someone I've never met, it's bloody Xmas.

I don't understand the problem with her having the sausages?
Meat Eaters have (assuming turkey but insert whatever meat ) potatoes and veg, the veggie has her sausages, (her turkey substitute) potatoes and veg too.
Everybody has the same.
Do you actually know if the person eats pate? ( can't stand the stuff meat or veggie! Everything veggie does seem to always be mushroom, or egg).

Agree that if you're having anything in animal fat then you're not a vegetarian.
Also a lot of 'vegetarians' do eat fish
No, they are not vegetarians either!
They are pescatarians.
Get really annoyed by people saying they are vegetarian but eat chicken or fish. then you're not a vegetarian then?

I don't understand the problem with her having the sausages?

A) because sausages are not suitable Christmas dinner food and
B) because it turns out that, as OP guessed, the suggestion of sausages was just a polite suggestion by the friends to minimise trouble, and NOT what this guest asked for.

Take this at face value. Friend is veggie, doesn't want a fuss. Buy a nice veggie nut roast for starter or mini veggie toad in hole, and a veggie pie thing for main or veggie tart for starter and veggie toad in hole or nut roast for main. Cook a small baking tin of potatoes not in animal fat and relax.

Enjoy your dinner.

PS - and what BillyShingles says "Ask friend for this lady's number and talk to her direct."

I've had Linda McCartney sausages every Christmas dinner for years, with veg and red Bisto and Paxo stuffing which is also veggie.. Not because they are easy but because I really like them with a roast dinner. this year I am making mushrooms in puff pastry, a kind of veggie Wellington.

I LOVE the LM sausages and while I get this was apparently suggested out of politeness I'd be very happy to have them for xmas dinner.

As it happens I'm having quorn fillets, my choice as I've been having the sausages a lot lately and fancy a change.

Agree if you are having goose fat on potatoes or eat chicken/fish you're NOT a veggie. And claiming you are makes it harder for those who are.

I've had xmas dinners with various people over the years and never to my knowledge put them out and always had delicious dinners and a lovely day with ONE exception and that was the one Christmas I spent with my now ex in laws who always eat out for Christmas dinner and hadn't told the restaurant. That left the restaurant (small family run place plus this was 20 years ago) scrabbling and me feeling like I'd spoiled Christmas dinner. But that was more to do with them objecting to me than the veggie thing (whole other thread!).

That includes the family that took me in when I was stuck in a difficult housing situation, I was a last minute addition to xmas dinner as my transport home got cancelled and the poor host was feeding 20+!! I was made to feel very welcome and the veggie food was enjoyed and complimented by the omnivores too.

Have a lovely Christmas op

I'd be pissed off too OP. Not least because they should have let you know six weeks ago.

I wouldn't want someone bring a tray of sausages (or anything else) to pop in my oven as though that's no big deal. When I'm cooking a special meal, my oven and hobs are already accounted for.

There is no way I'd serve bisto, whether they requested it or not - gravy is homemade, veggie or otherwise. I'm a good cook and proud of it, you don't bring your own food to my dinner unless everyone is doing it (a potluck type thing). I'd actually be a bit offended by it.

It's your house, your dinner and you're the host. If they won't tell you anything other than veggie sausages then do whatever YOU want to do. I know some of the veggie sausies are nice but if you're trying to lay in a feast, it's a bit of a come down.

Our meat-loving daughter decided to become a vegetarian on principle two years ago. This Cheese and Nut loaf with mushrooms is so good that my carnivore husband actually finds it acceptable as a main meal in itself! It's a bit fiddly to put together but easy, if you see what I mean, I'm just about to make it now for our Christmas Eve dinner! Merry Christmas!

I've got a cranberry nut loaf and a butternut Wellington ready made from sainsburys as our vegetarian options...but it's the two types of potatoes and gravy that are the annoying bit...I would have wanted to know about that in advance.

Why are people still insisting the OP take the guest at face value, and serve up the veggie sausages?

They've admitted they don't actually want veggie sausages - they were just trying not to be any bother!

Sausages are about as un-festive as it gets - of course the OP wants to provide something else.

This thread just confirms what an utter minefield it is.

I'm veggie, but I eat fish.

I'm veggie, but I eat goose fat potatoes.

I'm veggie but I hate mushrooms / aubergine / goats cheese.

I'm veggie and I'd hate you to go to any bother.

I'm veggie, and I hate that all we get is whatever vegetables are being served up.

I'm veggie, and I expect you to know that all sorts of ostensibly non-meat items (wine?!) are not suitable.

I'm veggie, and you need to cover my food with tin foil in the oven / use separate utensils.

I'm veggie and that ^^ wouldn't bother me.

As if Christmas Day isn't manic enough.

for you, OP.

I am a veggie and If I were visiting strangers for Christmas dinner I would happily eat the non meaty items, but would of course be very appreciative of your care and trouble in making me something special.

Veggie is simple compared to Vegan. Our DIL, whom we love very much, is coming for Christmas. At least we have some warning this time; we were only told after they arrived on their previous visit that she had changed from Veggie to Vegan.

The problem is trying to find really delicious things for her especially puddings. Avoiding all forms of dairy produce is difficult; DS says she eats a lot of cashews. She doesn't like spicy food either. We can hardly feast on traditional stuff while she has a plate of nuts.

We will cope. She is worth every effort.

To everyone on this thread, it's "veggie" (veggie), not "vege" (veeejh).

@Dowager: b/c OP didn't explain that she confirmed that guest doesn't really want sausages until about 1/4 into thread on a phone call... it would not surprise me if OP pushed to create that info by asking "Are you SURE they wouldn't like something more complicated?" which is different from the veggie saying "tbh, sausages are crap" which is how OP presented the info.

omg, I hate being centre of attention. I'd rather stay at home by myself than know I caused all this consternation.

I'd talk to the guest as she will have likes and dislikes like anyone and it'd be a shame to make something she then doesn't want. There are so many delicious things in the shops - I have a chestnut and mushroom wellington from tesco.

Whoever posted that chestnut and cranberry ring - that looks lush, I must try that!

Someone suggested lasagne or shepherds pie. Would hate those for Christmas dinner, the whole point of Christmas dinner is all the delicious trimmings and pasta just doesn't cut it - that's like when you go to a pub ato Christmas and everyone else has a lovely dinner with all the trimmings and the veggie option is pasta in tomato sauce ffs.

LM sausages are pretty good and I'd be more than happy with them as it's all the sides I love most!

I make a delicious gravy with roasted onions and bistro onion gravy granules, use the water from the sprouts, it's yummy.

The OP is one long whinge about how difficult vegetarians are even when this guest is clearly trying not to be. It's encouraged people to trot out their boring prejudices about what crap cardboard shite vegetarians eat.

If there's smoke coming from the kitchen on Christmas Day I'd check whether it's burnt dinner or burning martyr.

I am not a vegetarian.

Re. veggie pate, Annalee - I make a mushroom and walnut pate which is quick and easy. Saute onions and chopped mushrooms, add rehydrated dried mushrooms, cook it down, then blitz with walnuts and some cream cheese (I think there are veggie alternatives if she is dairy free too).

Or a restaurant local to me makes a beetroot and walnut pate that is to die for - cooked beetroot, toasted walnuts, blitz it all with some cream cheese - it is absolutely wonderful.

We're veggie and having the Linda McCartney vegetarian roast this year. Haven't tried it before so fingers crossed it's okay.

I don't eat meat but wouldn't want you to go to all that trouble. Seriously.

I'm cooking myself at home at Christmas. I have meet etc for dh and Dd. However I genuinely just want - and I am having - the veggies and the trimmings. So Yorkshire puddings filled with stuffing, potatoes and veg mainly.

However I don't use meat fat to make my potatoes a if I was I'd just keep 3 or 4 to one side and cook them separately in oil.

I just use normal veggie gravy granules.

Only other veg I cook differently is soriuts. I do dh and Dd sprouts sliced with chorizo or bacon. I do mine without; infact I just steam a handful for myself in the microwave.

We don't really do starters on Christmas Day but for other meals I will just have some form of salad or just bread and oils.

I don't like thinks like nut or quorn roasts. I don't like nuts in any food (only on their own) so if you really do feel you have to make extra do check. I'd eat it because I would need to feel polite but wouldn't really enjoy it sadly.

I may make some myself a couple of little quorn sausages for Christmas dinner as my 'pigs in blankets' equivalent. But don't always bother.

I think many vegetarians are entirely happy with vegetables and perhaps the sausages (vegetarian ones) which after all are the best bit.

Sometimes one goes to a lot of trouble to produce a special vegetarian dish and then one can't help feeling a bit cross when the intended target (!) doesn't display the requisite enthusiasm. Ex-wife of dh's friend used to regularly "upset" her glass of wine over people's offerings, even cordon bleu ones, so she didn't have to eat them. A vegetarian is no more likely to be a foodie than a meat-eater.

Don't give her parmesan . Remember, not all cheeses are suitable for vegetarians as they contain rennet.

OP is getting a very hard time when it was perfectly obvious from her first post that she had not spoken directly to the vegetarian guest, just had vague assurances from another guest that sausages would be fine. She was absolutely right to probe further and find out more, and she is also demonstrating what a good host she is by wanting to provide something nice and special for all her guests.

No burning martyr vibes coming off her posts for me, I just sense somebody who had everything planned, had to do some last minute re-thinking, but is fine with that, and now getting on with it.

As for all the people saying it's fine, just serve up the vegetables and stuffing, really? My turkey stuffing is pork, sage and onion, so that would be no good. Lots of people do quite elaborate vegetable dishes for Christmas lunch using bacon, goose fat and so forth. My gravy is made with the turkey roasting juices and giblet stock so that would be no good either, and woe betide anybody who suggested using instant Bisto gravy or diluted Marmite instead!

It's always going to involve extra work catering for somebody who can't or won't eat some of the traditional Christmas food. That isn't a big deal if it's known in advance and factored in at the planning stage. But it does require the guest to give a clear and honest indication of what they will and won't eat and the host to take that on board.

Krampus - it's chilled. Very tasty. I may have had some for breakfast today

Ready made veg wellington. My parents and husband are veggie and it's only me and my 23 month old with the turkey. Flora Cuisine cooking liquid makes amazing Roast potatoes and parsnips x

AnnaleeP said in her OP that she didn't want to serve this 'poor lady' 'freaking LM sausages', complained about not being given her dietary requirements six weeks in advance like being asked to cater for a vegetarian is really difficult. It's not.

She then embarked on a quest on MN to find her something else to eat without actually contacting her direct to find out whether she will actually like the dish. She might not. But she does like LM sausages.

Why not call her direct? That way she can find out exactly what the woman wants to eat and make it rather than asking vegetarians on MN what they like or worse, giving people who find vegetarians troublesome yet another opportunity to whine about them.

Alternatively she could just take the first instruction and give her freaking cardboardy LM sausages, shop-bought fresh vegetarian gravy, boiled vegetables and potatoes roasted in vegetable oil.