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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be quite pissed off?

27 replies

SaltySeaDogs · 22/12/2016 19:49

Had plans to meet friend after work today. Been working flat out and managed to swing a 5pm finish which never happens so stayed out (I live in London) to xmas shop. She is a student and works PT but said she'd be finished by 6ish and would message. I messaged her with my location and only just got a text apologising and saying her phone had died at work so she's gone home but am I around tomorrow?

I'm not, I'm going away! Also my time is precious - I'm studying and working a crazy hours job, I'm pissed off she didn't tell me and was so cavalier with arrangements.

What can I say back? Am I overrracting???

OP posts:
StealthPolarBear · 22/12/2016 19:50

Were you meeting her to Christmas Shop? Yanbu

Original poster
SaltySeaDogs · 22/12/2016 19:51

No to eat dinner - purposely saved myself. I'm really annoyed

OP posts:
UnicornInDMboots · 22/12/2016 19:51

Nah yanbu . Even if she had found a computer she could have logged onto fb and messaged you or something ! Not fair

Original poster
SaltySeaDogs · 22/12/2016 19:51

What should I say?

OP posts:
Original poster
SaltySeaDogs · 22/12/2016 19:52

Would have just gone home three fucking hours ago otherwise - and eaten dinner!

OP posts:
Original poster
SaltySeaDogs · 22/12/2016 19:53

I do get it but I am out of house 8-7 every day, she studies 4 hours a week. What a piss take. She hasn't even offered to come back out...

OP posts:
lovelearning · 22/12/2016 19:54

Am I overrracting???

No.

What should I say?

Tell her that you were inconvenienced and how it made you feel.

Original poster
SaltySeaDogs · 22/12/2016 19:56

But in fairness to her her phone died...

OP posts:
lovelearning · 22/12/2016 20:01

a text apologising and saying her phone had died at work so she's gone home but am I around tomorrow?

She ought to have been grovelling.

It's disrespectful to keep people waiting.

Owllady · 22/12/2016 20:05

That's really crap of her

DierdrePewtey · 22/12/2016 20:07

Phone died is a shit excuse. Did no one she work with have a charger?

SharingMichelle · 22/12/2016 20:10

Reply:
Omg I've been out in town killing time for 3 hours until we meet up. I could have been home hours ago. Can't believe you didnt get a message to me! Sorry- not free tomorrow. See you in the new year.

newmummyagain · 22/12/2016 20:10

I would have been very annoyed too, i really dislike being let down.

Unfortunately it happens a lot now. Before mobile phones then arrangements were solid. You arranged where to meet and you were there early.

Now arrangements are often half hearted and not settled in people's minds until they confirm nearer the time. It's really frustrating. Sorry.

Original poster
SaltySeaDogs · 22/12/2016 20:11

This is what I sent: Ah ok, kinda a shame as I finished work early and stayed out on purpose - these things happen though! Sorry I'm going to Devon tomorrow and not back until nye 😕

OP posts:
gamerchick · 22/12/2016 20:15

A very British reply Grin

lovelearning · 22/12/2016 20:18

SaltySeaDogs, if you value your friendship with this woman, you have to be honest with her.

"I waited for three hours. I was hungry. I got exceedingly annoyed at being kept waiting so long."

JellyOnIcecream · 22/12/2016 20:18

I think your reply is too polite, depends how much you value her as a friend of course, but telling her she's out of order would have been a good thing.

Original poster
SaltySeaDogs · 22/12/2016 20:37

She's replied saying sorry again - I want to reply and say I'm pissed off! Help!

OP posts:
Reality16 · 22/12/2016 20:42

Oh god I would have totally told her how annoyed I was.

KlingybunFistelvase · 22/12/2016 20:46

Personally, I'd ignore her reply, as it sounds like she's waiting for you to say "that's ok" or similar.

Your text was v polite though, (maybe a little too polite). I wouldn't waste any more time on it. She was flakey and rude not to get a message to you somehow. I'd have been peeved too. Phone dying is a rubbish excuse. It's easy to make sure your phone is charged before you go out (unless it's faulty I guess).

gamerchick · 22/12/2016 20:48

Nooo don't reply, that will speak better than any words.

Foxysoxy01 · 22/12/2016 21:04

You could reply something like...

'tbh I'm pretty pissed off and hungry right now, I'm sure I'll get over it but going home to eat. Will see you at some point in the new year'

Then just ignore anything else she sends till after you get back.

Original poster
SaltySeaDogs · 22/12/2016 21:21

I sent this:

Yeah ok but didn't hear from you at all since 3 so purposely didn't eat/make other arrangements as we had plans - then stayed out for three hours after work only to see your text saying you'd gone home, bit frustrating tbh. Will see you in the new year!

OP posts:
Milkand2sugarsplease · 22/12/2016 21:28

Very rude of her IMO.

Either ask to borrow a charger or text you once she realised her phone was getting low and wouldn't last. Not difficult.

TheGruffaloMother · 22/12/2016 21:35

Your follow up text is good...makes up for you apologising to her in the first text (for not being available). I'd have been livid Angry