to not want my dd to keep being paired up with the only boy in her dance class?

[juney6]

he is her age and the only boy in their dance class, she is 12 and feels uncomfortable with it. they pair up to help with the stretches etc. but who will the boy pair up with? is that really her problem though? i think all the girls would be uncomfy with it, as they touch legs etc.

AIBU?

yes why?

Nothing sinister, juney It's just that it sometimes helps knowing what other problems someone is having ... which is why sensible people change usernames if they want clean advice, as you tried to get on the other thread!

My "MMmmm" was because I was re-reading my original response to see if I was being too flippant for someone with a number of issues to deal with!

She is going to have to get used to it, it's dancing you have tone comfortable with the oppersite sex touching your legs.

I doubt she's planning on becoming a dancer, for most girls that age it's just a fun hobby and if she's not enjoying it then it's not fulfilling that goal, is it.

Yes, she's getting a great opportunity to be the one to dance with the only boy, but it's ok if she isn't loving it. Just have a quiet word with the teacher and explain that she's feeling a bit self conscious and ask her to move the partnerships around. Needn't be a big deal.

(And no one is implying the boy is doing anything wrong. Just that it's ok for a 12 year old girl to not feel comfortable being touched by a boy for the sake of a casual hobby.)

(I haven't read your other thread.)

Most of us weren't talking about professional dancing, Teaching, but about any dancing or am-dram at this age or above. Ime it can be great for counteracting that whole thing of only being able to see the opposite sex in terms of sexuality. Working together with boys in dance or drama or martial arts is a great way of learning to get on with the opposite sex as friends.

Obviously, if the dd is seriously hung-up about this, then nobody should force her. But it sounds a bit as if the OP expects her to be uncomfortable and as if this is either the norm in her social group or the OP thinks it is the norm. And actually, no, ime it isn't. Girls of this age who go in for drama or dance tend to get comfortable around boys very quickly.

Coincidentally, I'm watching a production of the Nutcracker Suite at the moment - with around eight little girls dancing with boys and touching and being touched by them. I must say, I'm a bit puzzled about what your dd thought dancing was about.

My son was the only boy in his ballet class, and he loved it, and was pretty good at it too. He outgrew his classes when he was 10, and went to a new school. The girls in his first class were mean and unwelcoming (didn't want to go near him, made fun of him) and he lost confidence and refused to go back.

It can be really hard being the only boy in the dance class. Maybe your dd is being nice to him and just telling you she is uncomfortable, but it might help if you get her to think how he is feeling.

The only thing I think is wrong about this is the pupils helping one another to stretch.

There's far too much of all this stretching business in kids' dance classes lately - loads of dance schools do it and there seems to be some sort of competitive element between the kids to see just how far they can go. It isn't necessary, and could cause irreversible damage to young joints.

I agree with dodo. It's unlikely at age 12 that they are capable of helpful my each other to stretch. I assist my daughter but only doing very safe Lisa Howell exercises. Children assisting each other are likely to be over stretching or forcing.

But in general if it's a class with few boys it's considered an honour to be paired with a boy. Contemporary is a dance form where you really have to lose your inhibitions.