This morning my partner made a joke about me joining the gym. He's brought this up several times in recent months, even offering to pay for me to join. The reason why he's been badgering me about this has been niggling at me. Today I told him I didn't understand what he meant by it.
He told me "You could look amazing if you went to the gym" he later qualified this and said I look nice now but could look better.
He very rarely says appreciative things about how I look or my body. He occasionally says I look "nice". When I recently said "is that all?" after making a big effort for a special occasion and he said "ok. Very nice"! This and what he's said this morning makes me think he finds me unattractive.
I'm a curvy size 10, sometimes pushing a 12. I was definitely a little slimmer when we first met a year and a half ago, but I can still fit in my clothes, (although some of the jeans are a little tight!) However I've put it down to aging as I'm 36. It's not like I do no excercise. I go for a 45 minute or hour long run once a week and also cycle 6 miles 3 or 4 times a week.
However I also enjoy good food. I feel life is for living and I want to enjoy food and not spend hours in the gym. I'm sure I could look better if I toned up, but it's not really a priority for me. I'm a curvy hourglass shape so I'm never going to look athletic.
I'm feel like I'm not perfect, but neither is he! I wouldn't dream of telling him he needs to sort his hairy back out! I'm disappointed he's being so shallow.
I feel he's basically said he's not happy/satisfied with who I am and how I look. I feel he's implying I'm fat and lazy.
AIBU to be so upset? Am I overreacting? Should I try to take this as him trying to be helpful?! He's mortified I'm so upset.
We're suppposed to be going out tonight and I can barely look at him. I feel like shit!