We have 2 dc (2 and nearly 5). Never even wanted more than one tbh but got broody for dc2 and lucky we conceived him when we did as a few days later we thought "hmm maybe we don't want a second" but he was already in situ by then.
I've enjoyed two blissful years of feeling like yep we are done, pregnancy with a child already was awful can't wait for them to grow up etc loving life.
I've been able to be 100% happy for any and all pregnant friends and colleagues safe in the knowledge that phew that isn't me going to be woken many times a night etc.
The last week or so I've felt a bit down, and driving home from work tonight (only got home 20.mins ago), I had this realisation that I'm down because I want another baby. And I know we can't have one.
We can't afford it. We don't have the space. I really don't think I have the energy. We have "plans" and are very much looking forward to being 50 and the kids off to uni/moving out etc. We are 31 now.
We had a contraception failure about 3 months ago and I took the MAP for the first time ever. Obviously it did the trick but tonight I was just wishing so much that it had failed
I don't even understand the feelings as when we had the mishap at the time I was certain that if the pill failed I couldn't see through a pregnancy.
Wtf is wrong with me?!
I need to give my head a wobble.