I don't want to give all examples cos it's really outy. But she always organises things and excludes others (I'm not a person she excludes) but I feel uncomfortable with the exclusions. At the same time I like to go to things. She'll organise drinks let's say with a couple of mums and then say it's better to just be us and not invite other people - so pretty much banning us from inviting others. Then you feel you can't talk about it and you turn up and she's invited like 10 other mums which is great but super uncomfortable because you haven't been allowed to invite or mention it to anyone. another incident is where I was trying to organise a coffee for her and another mum at my house but unfortunately my LO is ill. So I sent a message to say better you don't come tomorrow so sorry etc wouldn't want your LO to come and get poorly she said 'I wouldnt come anyway cos my LO is ill' just a blizzare response. Finally there is a big school PTA fundraising quiz in the New Year. It's really popular and you need a team sorted asap. I asked if she fancied being in a team and I would see if I can ask some others she said yes that would be great. So I set up a facebook messenger group to ask a few other mums and she responds 'I'm coming anyway so that's ok with me to be in a team with you?!' But when she needs help from me I'm always there for her like she needed some professional help with her job that my job relates too and I got my colleagues to give her advice and see her through a tough patch. What's her issue? She's not a bad person. She's so friendly and chatty in person. It's just all her messages seem so dismissive and she's quite controlling (e.g. With these events). I don't want to go NC but I'm finding her draining and confusing. I think it's possibly a control thing she always has to be in control? When she talks to me about things at work (issues with her colleagues) it seems similar things about her wanting to be in charge/controlling