I feel guilty but I am spending less and less time with my family as they make me so miserable.
My mum is disabled and I do bits and pieces for her (my dad is her full time carer) so I try and get them shopping etc and give my dad a break. I could do more I hold my hands up but I have a full time job, am studying part time, have a dog and am getting married in February. I also have been diagnosed with panic disorder (an anxiety condition) which I am trying to beat.
I have two older brothers (in their 40s) who I get on well with but don't see much of either. One of them is very moody and makes comments that I spend all my time with my fiancé and never really do family things. Trouble is, the 4 of them are so dysfunctional it's embarrassing.
I tried to have Xmas day with them 2 years ago - my brothers just got drunk (I mean they didn't even want to eat dinner) my dad and mum bicker, my mum is in the early stages of dementia and my dad is controlling and stubborn. I hated it.
Other halfs family are "normal" - not perfect by any means but they at least sit round and a table and keep the bickering to a socially acceptable level. They cook a lovely meal and spoil me a little bit. My own parents just mainly take from
Me and ask me to cook etc on Xmas day, they wouldn't dream of asking their sons that. They are kind deep down and would be there for me if I really needed them. And they are in bad health (which oh'S parents are not so its not fair to compare as his will probably be the same one day) but they don't do anything to help themselves either.
Am I being unreasonable to want to spend my Christmas and more time in general with my in-laws? Am I shirking responsibility or saving sanity?