It's little things like if we invite her & fil round on occasions like Christmas, Easter, banks holidays etc, she will nearly always say 'i just need to check with dd first'. And every year she takes the day off work to see my sil son on his birthday no matter what day of the week it falls on but has never done this with our ds. Normally we alternate Christmases with my parents & pil. This year we decided to spend Christmas at home & they are all coming to us including sil & family. My pil don't live close to us so a few weeks ago dh asked his mum if they would like to stay overnight on Christmas eve and/or Christmas day. Mil said 'I'll let you know' & said nothing more about it. So yesterday dh asked her again & she said 'we're staying with dd on Christmas eve' (they've spent Christmas eve with them nearly every year). Dh asked if they'd be staying over on Christmas day instead & mil said 'i don't think so but ill talk to your dad'. A mini cab home would cost them at least £50 & I know mil would not be willing to pay that. They both also like to drink & neither is likely to want to drive home so the most likely explanation is that they are planning to go back to my sil. My dh acts like this sort of thing doesn't bother him anymore but I know it does. My ds would love it if they stayed over & I think it's a bit unfair if they choose to spend both nights with their other dgc. We also have a 7 month old dd & thought mil would love the opportunity to spend extra time with her on her first Christmas. I appreciate that it may sound like I'm moaning about nothing but this sort of thing is just the tip of the iceberg & it really gets on my nerves. Is it normal for parents to treat daughters differently?
P.s. SIL is not a single parent so that won't be the reason mil behaves like this