Tempting fate - Do you avoid doing it?

[amispartacus]

Would you hold a major birthday party before the actual birthday? Or would you hold off until it happened?

Counting chickens before they hatch and all that. I know that things are very unlikely to happen but do you believe in not tempting fate.

How major is the birthday? If it's 100 then yes I probably would!

How major is the birthday? If it's 100 then yes I probably would

It's hypothetical - but inspired by another thread and a reminder of something that happened.

No, never.
I don't congratulate before that or celebrate. It's seen as bad luck where I'm from. It would just seem weird/rude to me.

I do - I know it's ludicrous and irrational, but I can't shake it off, I think because my mum believed so strongly in the danger of tempting fate. I've always believed that if you think things will go well something bad will happen to intervene. As a child I remember being horrified to hear other pupils saying they knew they'd done well in an exam - didn't they know that that would make them fail?! I know this is silly, but on some level I really believe that it's why I can't conceive, because each cycle try as I might I can't get stop getting my hopes up. So, logical me says go ahead and hold the party and recognise that what will be will be and you can't really tempt fate - but irrational me understands why it makes you anxious!

Oh, and on the big birthday front: my husband's grandma made us all have a big 99th thing for her because 'at my age you can't go putting off parties!'. She's now 102 and still going strong!

It's like 'touch wood'.

Because touch wood will really undo anything you've said. I've never had a road accident (touch wood).

Saying you've never had a road accident will not make you have one soon.
Saying touch wood won't undo it

But I still say 'touch wood'

I am generally not superstitious or woo about things but this is one thing I am irrational about. Like
I wouldn't buy a present for a baby until after it's born - baby showers freak me out!

I'm a completely rational person but yeah, I don't like to tempt fate. DP does though. One incident comes to my mind: "Oh don't worry MrsMattBomer, nobody ever falls off these things!" ...cue him falling off and breaking his leg.

I wouldn't buy a present for a baby until after it's born - baby showers freak me out!

I'm like that too. Plus I would never say I did well in an exam for fer of tempting fate.

What's weird is I'm a rational cynic in most aspects of my life, this seems to be my one blind spot!

I'm of the opinion that there's no such thing as fate so I tempt away all the time.

Oh, and I'd DEFINITELY hold a party in advance of a birthday. If 'fate' had decreed I was going to die before my birthday, at least I'd have had a lovely party beforehand.

Or is the idea that having the party will in itself prompt fate to kill me?

Celebrating a birthday before the actual event wouldn't bother me from a tempting fate point of view (if I was struck down before I actually got to my birthday it would be nice that I had a send off). Presents for babies- no i don't tempt fate there from previous very sad experience.

Yes Gwen it's bad luck is the (nonsensical) idea. Like LadyLothian I am super rational and cynical in general but with random quirks like this.

And I also think there's no such thing as fate! So it's ridiculous.

I don't believe in "tempting fate" but I do believe in "sod's law"

That being said, I never agree and get very frustrated with people who get all judgy and cats bum mouth about others announcing pregnancy news before 12 weeks. Having actually heard someone say "well they did announce it before 12 weeks" in response to the news that someone had suffered a miscarriage, made me absolutely rage. As if sharing wonderful news was the catalyst for the miscarriage. Fucking twats.

I said the same thing to my mum who wondered why we were telling people early. Well I'd had a scan at 5+6 and seen the heartbeat, and another at 8 weeks and seen the heartbeat, and another at 10 weeks and seen the heartbeat. Honestly, I had to tell her that seeing a heartbeat is no guarantee of anything at all but 12 weeks is not a magic mark! And besides, all the people that we told were those people who we knew we'd have told if we'd suffered a loss.

What's weird is I'm a rational cynic in most aspects of my life, this seems to be my one blind spot!

Me too! My husband (who is religious - I am not) has pointed this out, saying that at least his articles of faith with no objective proof have thousands of years of tradition on their side, whereas mine are just made up!

I don't buy baby presents or cards before baby arrives. When dd1 was born we had a carseat, a Moses basket and a 7 pack of vests / sleep suits from Asda. Nothing else!

I say touch wood etc a lot.

I never found out the sex of my twins or made definite choices on names as I was considered a high risk pregnancy. But I did buy a double buggy. Don't know how that works?

Just to clarify, I don't think other people tempting fate makes bad things happen. I think if I tempt fate I will somehow be responsible. Not sure what magic powers I think I have!

Do you cross your fingers?

I am not religious. But I do worry that I somehow jinx something by saying something so I try to stop it.

No, it doesn't make sense.

That's one of the things that worried me about Kate Middletons's pregnancy. Such a high profile event, all the cameras there and the crowds. What if something had gone wrong?

If she had asked everyone to leave her alone until Prince George was born, would they?

Celebrating things before they are confimed is not something I would do.

I don't avoid it. I walk under ladders, open umbrellas indoors, had DS's buggy set up in our house before he was born.

But I don't believe in "fate" anyway. I'm not remotely superstitious.

Oh, me too trilby, but I had never quite realised it before. Although an ex once told me I had a weird sort of narcissism where I thought the world revolved me but only in a negative way; that I thought everything bad was my fault!