abusive?

[Woollymammoth63]

Tonight Dh has been doing a lot of wind ups and spouting off at the TV etc for eg he called a female apprentice candidate a cow. A little later, ds was being grumpy, told me I was being annoying and said' shut up mum' - very unusual as he is quite polite. Not said aggressively but obviously that's rude. At the same moment Dh started laughing and I said why are you laughing its not funny, to which Dh said 'Piss off, you old cow! I can laugh if I want to! ' when I then said that was rude, he said no I was being rude telling him off for laughing.
I find all this really annoying and confusing- surely that's really bad behaviour and not excused by the fact I was saying not to laugh as ds was being rude? Dh may not have been listening to ds and was possibly listening to his I pad and hence some misunderstanding about that part, but surely it's just out of order to say what he said, regardless of his reasoning?

Thankyou , I at least feel I got my point across, and for once feel I know what's happening here without so much self doubt.

Has he any views on how he encouraged your son to speak to you?

So he insists he did not hear that conversation and was laughing at something on his I pad. He thinks I was unfair to him. I re iterated it's not the first time he has bullied me and I won't put up with it, literally ever again. I asked him if he wants to ruin his child's life - I haven't told him this but I am having in depth therapy at the moment for childhood family issues.

Good for you. Ridiculous behaviour from a grown man.

So the day has panned out thus- Dh observing me and being more reasonable. I get the impression he is thinking about what is troubling me and what I have said. He has not said anything negative. Previously I always felt things were brushed under the carpet - I would say something, but he wouldn't listen. Finally I feel I have got my point across and perhaps some of the passive aggressive stuff will stop.

Yay! Go you Woolly!

:) x