It's the department staff do tonight, and I've been asked for a lift by two colleagues. I do like them and consider them to be "work friends", but two things are bothering me about the request.
We were all talking over lunch about how everyone was getting to the restaurant. We're all quite far flung, and few of us live near enough to lift share with one another. My DP is actually giving me a lift, I'm not driving (even though I'm not drinking as I'm PG, but he wanted to do me the favour). When asked, I said what my plan was, and colleague one said, "Your route Is right past my flat, so you can pick colleague 2 and I up on your way in."
I said I would ask DP, since it's his car, but thought it was already pretty rude that she ordered, rather than asked of me.
She went on to say that the two of them were having a drink together at her place first, which has rubbed me up the wrong way a bit. The three of us are all very friendly together, but it made me sad to not have been invited, but then expect to just show up as the designated taxi service on the way into town. I go to her flat often for get togethers, so it wouldn't be out of the ordinary to normally receive an invite. I understand that I'm PG, so couldn't actually have a drink, but it would have been nice to spend the time before going to the restaurant.
Secondly, they do have a habit of "leaving me out" when the three of us are together. Colleague 1 is worse for this, colleague 2 is lovely and probably doesn't mean to. On many occasions I've felt like a bit of a third wheel. I've known colleague 1 for a while, and I've realised recently that she's a bit of a taker not a giver as far as friendship goes. She'll swear blind she's your very best friend until someone "better" is around, and then you are dropped very fast. On my part, I know that I'm already very sensitive to this, as I always feel like I'm the one in any group of friends who is forgotten most quickly whilst everyone else pairs off to talk/walk/sit with others.
So I suppose I just feel sad at the thought of turning up to taxi them into town when they've already started their fun without inviting me, and then them racing ahead together into the restaurant (colleague 1 will often do this sort of thing) to leave me to wander in awkwardly behind them, and possibly be ignored thereafter, despite the lift-giving.
As she was leaving work, colleague 1 called into me, "Pick us up at quarter past seven, then." Didn't wait for a reply.
AIBU to not give them a lift, or do I need to have a word with myself and get on with it?