To be wary of this tinder guy?

[harveyyspecter]

Started talking to a guy on tinder earlier today - conversation flowing, everything fine.

I told him I have a little girl and asked how he felt about dating someone with kids as obviously dd will always be my priority. His reply was that he still wants to meet me as in his opinion kids come second to feelings but in my case he knows that won't be how it is for me.

Am I being daft? I don't fully get what he's saying or whether it's reason to not bother with him.

I think he means in his opinion it doesn't matter if you have a kid, he wants to know if he has feelings for you first but knows your first priority and feelings will always be for your kid. I think. It's pretty garbled tbh, could have explained himself better.

He definitely could have been clearer. I just don't want to carry on talking to someone who doesn't like the fact that I have a child.

I get it, as a single parent dating myself when someone says a child coming second it puts your back up. From what I am getting from it though it sounds like he's badly explained he'd like to see how feelings progress between the two of you first.

Just ask him what he means OP, just to clarify (and potentially not waste child care meeting him)

Sounds to me like he's saying that if the two of you are right for one another it won't matter that you have kids (though it also implies that in an ideal world he'd rather meet someone who didn't have kids).

I asked him and he said that obviously dd will always be my first priority as she should be but that his focus would be me per se.

Give him a chance?

You spoke with him on tinder today? Not sure why you mentioned kids when you haven't even met the bloke.

Yeah i wouldn't have brought them up until you'd met him. Jumping the gun a tad.

I think it's always important to get the fact you have kids out in the open straight away. Sounds like he just phrased it clumsily but he's saying he doesn't have an issue with it.

Yes but much easier to gauge someone's response or feeling towards kids in person, when you're meeting them IMO. Someone may not be keen, but they may meet you and completely change their mind because they can tell you're Amazing!

I'd rather tell them straight away so that I don't waste my time. It would feel like I was trying to hide it as well if I didn't tell them before meeting.