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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think this is a threat?

17 replies

iwilldoit30 · 07/12/2016 19:55

I have two young but well behaved children, well in general. We're at a pub having dinner, after 30 minutes eldest starts to moan she is hungry, does it a bit repetitively. Youngest who is one is staring to squirm around now as she I'd probably hungry too and had sat in a wooden heigh chair for quite a while now. I've not eaten yet so I'm starving too, i say to husband that it's taking a while....fine. Another ten minutes pass and I notice people who came in after us keep getting their and we don't have ours, it's been 50 minutes now, 6 year old keeps going on about being starving, one year old getting ratty because it's past her feeding time now and she is probably bored.

Feels lik pressure is mounting due to the wait for food and it being very late on a school night now. Husband turns to me after one year old has let a loud scream out now and says "I'm going to bloody leave in a minute" then I'm getting the hump I'm going to go" his referring to daughter moaning and one year old screaming plus the pressure of the time, the fact we have waited ages and everyone's hungry.

Like it's my fault, like a treat, as if it's my fault. Feels like if I don't shut the kids up his getting the ump and going to go.
But says nothing to the staff about us waiting so long which is why the kids are getting. Upset.

Aibu to think it feels like a threat or am I being daft?
If this don't make sense I'm sorry I'm so angry I can't read through it again because it's making me feel mad again!

OP posts:

AndShesGone · 07/12/2016 19:57

I would have assumed he meant you'd all leave

FinnMcCool · 07/12/2016 19:59

I would have thought he meant you were all getting up and going.

Sparlklesilverglitter · 07/12/2016 19:59

I would of assumed he meant we would all be leaving not just him

I have said to DH before now if the food doesn't arrive in 10 minutes I am going. I just get annoyed waiting an hour for a main to arrive

pilohshit · 07/12/2016 20:00

Complain about the shit service

MadHattersWineParty · 07/12/2016 20:00

Did you get your meal? Why did neither of you chase it up with the staff?

I'd probably think he meant he as in you all would leave as everyone's getting pissed off. But I wasn't there. What did you say in response to him?

EatTheCake · 07/12/2016 20:01

Oh the times me and dh have said that over the years. Food not arrived in 45 minutes, DC getting bored, were hungry.

I would of assumed he meant you'd all get up and go due to food taking an age

Original poster

iwilldoit30 · 07/12/2016 20:01

Then why keep muttering it too me? And why not say fine to me when I say I'm going to ask about the food order instead of being grumpy, why not so Ben mention to the staff anything at all but keep pulling pressure on me. I know I could be wrong that's why I'm asking as not good interrogating things

OP posts:

FeckinCrutches · 07/12/2016 20:02

I would have assumed he meant for you all to go?

Why on earth were you both just sat there without asking the staff where your meal was? I normally ask if it's getting on for 30 mins.

Pinkheart5915 · 07/12/2016 20:03

If DH said it I would assume he meant that due to bad service and DC being bored we were all getting up and leaving and understandly so

FeckinCrutches · 07/12/2016 20:03

Well why didn't you go and ask? Why did he have to go ?

AmeliaJack · 07/12/2016 20:03

I don't understand why neither of you asked the serving staff for an ETA on your meal?

Goingtobeawesome · 07/12/2016 20:04

Mountain. Molehill.

Snacks for the little ones. Ask after 20 minutes if no food has arrived. Tell your husband he's too old for tantrums. If he's going to threaten to leave tell him good bye.

SleepFreeZone · 07/12/2016 20:06

I would have asked one of the waitresses to find out where our order was after waiting 20 mins. Half an hour in we would have probably left to be honest.

user1471545174 · 07/12/2016 20:07

Just the way he expresses it I think - it doesn't mean he is attacking you, just that he is pissed off - TBH wouldn't anyone be pissed off after a 50 minute wait? I'd have left at 30 minutes but am not noted for patience!

My DH sometimes thinks my expressed annoyance at a general situation is directed at him, but it definitely isn't.

Best way to handle it is to agree, get up and go

MadHattersWineParty · 07/12/2016 20:11

Yeah, I'm a bit like that to be honest, I used to have to reassure DP that my little rage outburst at a delayed train or a delivery not turning up or whatever is being pissed off at the situation and not at him. I'm just a bit more vocal when I'm annoyed. No way I'd wait that long before asking where my food was though, I don't understand why neither of you went to find out what was going on.

Stillunexpected · 07/12/2016 20:34

Why are you so angry about this that you can't even reread your post? Why was it up to your husband to chase up the meal - were you not equally capable of doing that? Why were you both sitting there with increasingly tired and fractious children?!

NerrSnerr · 07/12/2016 20:41

It sounds like he meant you all get up and leave. Also why were you upset he didn't ask where the food was, you could have asked as well? It sounds like you just need to have a conversation with him.

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