AIBU he wants to go to funeral alone

[letmeeatcakes]

My partner of 16 years has just lost a friend he has known since uni days and has always maintained that he is a very good friend of his. Due to distance, we moved to europe six years ago, we dont see them often but did attend their daughters wedding a few months back, I booked/paid the accommodation, flights and jumped the hoops getting our daughters out of school so that we could all go as stated on the invite, I have been the one who corresponds albeit I must admit rarely, and I was the one who had to break the news to him about his death. I really like and respect the family and my partner has just told me he wants to go alone to the funeral. I feel really hurt and am now finding it really hard to be supportive towards him because of the resentment I feel. Am i being a drama llama and just swallow the hurt i feel

What is his reasoning?

Did he actually tell you why he doesn't want you to go?

If that's his choice, then he should go alone. I don't understand what possible relevance you making the arrangements for your family to attend the wedding has to whether you attend the funeral or not.

How old are your children, if you went would they have to attend also? If not then I would be insulted, you do not need an invite for a funeral. Go and pay your respects but I would avoid bringing children.

Why is it up go him if you both knew them?

I am staggered by your response.

Really? Staggered?

It would all depend on why he doesnt want you to go really.

he's probably going to meet up with alot of his old uni mates and knows that there will probably go on a massive piss up after the funeral
thats what dp done when his friend died im glad he didnt want me to go

If he wants to do it alone, you should let him. He's lost a friend, it's his grief. Don't make it about you.