DS is in his first year of secondary school. He's getting on brilliantly so far, has made lots of friends and is working well. A few weeks ago he came home very sniffly and quiet. He eventually told me that "everyone" was annoyed with him for something that wasn't his fault. Apparently another boy in his class had given him a pound coin, saying that he didn't want it. Ds spent it on something from the cafeteria. Then (of course) the other boy wanted it back. Then he said all his friends were saying he was a thief and "out of order". I reassured him that these things always just blow over, everyone will have forgotten about it by the weekend. Gave him a pound to give back to this boy, which he did, and all was fine.
Last week he came home with a small item that this same boy had once again said he didn't want. Not valuable, but possibly quite a popular thing. Initially ds said he was just "looking after" it. It hung around for a few days until I asked him to take it back. He said he would,but kept "forgetting". Tonight I said to him he needs to take it in tomorrow or I won't be giving him the money for a Christmas dinner at school. He got very angry at me and said that it was his, the boy had given it to him, he didn't see why he had to return it. I said that I didn't want a similar situation occurring as with the money, he said it wouldn't, because that happened within the space of a day and he's had this other thing for ages. I said that wasn't really relevant. Tried explaining to him I wouldn't be very happy as a parent if I had bought him something as a gift (which this thing apparently was) and he went and gave it away at school. DS said if that was the case then the boy would have asked for it back, and he hasn't, so his parents must be fine with it.
I've left it as it stands, he either returns it or he doesn't get his Christmas dinner money.
The thing is, I know I shouldn't get involved. But I know how sensitive ds is. If the boy changes his mind again and accuses him of stealing it he'll be devastated. He'd obviously return it immediately at that point, but I can easily imagine the boy telling his parents it was stolen and the parents complaining to the school. He's never been in trouble at school in his life. He is adamant that it won't happen and I would like that to be the case but I'm wary of repercussions.
Also, I've bought him a different version of the bloody thing for Christmas, before all this, so he'll end up with two! Mine will be better, but still.
Fully prepared to be told AIBU and to butt out!