31 days late to pick me up

[IDontLoveGlitterGlitterLovesMe]

Beginning of the year I found out that I'd got 2/3 more yrs left before I'd be totally incapacitated - unable to walk, talk, swallow or move any part of my body. I'll be able to blink and my mind will still be OK. This was expected, but not this soon - maybe another 5/6 yrs.

Most important thing before I can't communicate was to tell my family DNR/ADRT wishes. Previously my DSis' (7 & 10 years older than me) had been NC for 4 yrs as they had taken my ExH's side, who was a violent, abusive alcoholic, when we divorced and they continued to have a relationship with ExH, but NC with me.

Fantastic Dr helped me to tell them about my DNR/ADRT/illness in an email as I wanted to try and see if we could have a relationship again.
Dr said based on previous behaviour should not have any expectations, be judgemental, over-emotional or full of accusations so this was reflected in the email.

1 DSis replied saying both would drive over Weds - arrive 11am. By 5pm I'd not received any responses to my txts/calls, only couple of texts at 2pm saying been delayed.
Finally arrived at 5.30pm just as was walking to bus stop - I'm unable to drive.

I'm totally dependant on crutches, only able to carry 2 or 3 small items when shopping - DSis aware of this.
If they didn't really want to help that would have been OK as I wasn't expecting them to. I would ask someone else or order online.
I'm so grateful that they're talking to me now I don't mention when they're 6 hours late/cancel at last minute. This has continued since we got back in touch so is probably my fault - I've let it and never mention anything.

My bday was 4Nov. Had op 3Nov with 1 overnight stay. DSis asked if needed help - said no - would get taxis. DSis txted to say would come 5Nov, pick me up and I could stay for the weekend and celebrate my birthday which was a big birthday ...........AND I'm STILL WAITING!!!

Had no calls, texts, emails or any responses to mine. Checked with other family to make sure they're OK - they are. I spoke to my Dr who advised that I should let them know how their behaviour has made me feel and the impact it has had on me. DSis knows I won't mention my bday as my confidence was beaten out of me by my ExH during the last 5yrs of our marriage and I've always ignored any lateness/missed visits before. I am mortified that they forgot me, definitely more so than DSis - they've never been embarrassed before even when they previously forgot about meeting me for 16 days.

Maybe more of a WWYD rather than AIBU.
Any help is greatly appreciated otherwise we will just remain NC again.

Sorry no real advice but what an awful situation to be in op. I'm not sure what I would do? Probably NC but your situation is slightly different to 'normal' sorry you are going through this

I think you need to adjust your expectations. They are not going to step up. You will never be able to rely on them. You need to take them out of the loop - do you want someone like that involved in your care? To be able to make big, huge decisions for you? Talk to your doctor about making alternative plans without your sisters involvement. You cannot trust that they have your best interests at heart.

Sorry

I am sorry that you are having such serious health problems

I think you need to plan your care carefully and making contingencies for worst case scenarios without involving your family, sadly.
You cannot change their behaviour, only your response to it.
Consider an assessment of care needs by social services, get whatever consultant might be involved in your condition to advise you on third sector organisation which might be able to help, set up your DNR as you have done and make sure that information in known/accessible to ambulance services/999 etc.

Plan for the worst, then hope for the best.
I don't feel that I can advise you whether or not to go NC with your siblings - that is a much more emotive and emotional question, but it does not sound like you can rely on them now, never mind in the future when you might be in much more need of reliable help, care and support.