To ask what your worst birthday parties have been?

[Soubriquet]

I thought my Dd's 3rd birthday party this year was pretty bad.

It was at a soft play and weekend. There were 3 other parties going on at the same time as well as the general public. Only half the guests turned up (out 8!) and dd was really poorly that day too so spent the afternoon crying. We didn't realise she was a poorly as she was.

Luckily because it was soft play, the other children entertained themselves but it did mean they didn't want their dinner because they were having so much fun. It was a disaster.

But one we attended a few weeks ago was worse!

They had done it to a budget. I admire that. I love a good party on a budget. But there's budget and stupid.

They had picked a local games hall to hold the party and its cold in there at the best of the times. Heating was an additional extra so no heating was on. It was freezing! In fact it was warmer outside it was that cold. Most parents didn't take their coats off as they were dressed for a children's party that usually gets quite warm with alot of kids running around

The entertainment was a colouring table and balloons on the floor. There was an iPod in the corner playing music that was barely heard. The food was....ok for children. Ham or cheese sandwhiches, cheese nibbles and chocolate biscuits. That was it.

Only 4 children showed up out of a nursery class. My dd was her friend, ds was an added guest.

After an hour I couldn't feet my toes and ds (20 months) had turned blue.
He wouldn't stop crying, so I made my excuses and took him home leaving dd and Dh behind.

Apparently it didn't get much better. One game of pass the parcel and that was it for 2 hours

The child was only turning 4, so if it was a case of finances, surely nothing would have better!

Can you beat that?

Elsie, I had a similar situation when my son was young. He'd been to a football party in a gym, a well known bully's mum called me and said that another boy had him against a wall and was banging his head off the wall! And this lad was his mate (some mate), I called his mum and explained that this other mum had called and told me what had happened, she bought him right round, with his dad and made him apologise to my son for what he had done, obviously my son accepted the apology and they shook hands. That's good parenting right there, she didn't make excuses for him, she was livid. We didn't have a problem with him again, though we never had before to be honest, it was unusual behaviour for him. He was always a nice lad, he's grown into a nice young man too.

My worst party was one of my own, a Halloween party, I grossly underestimated how much food I'd have needed. But you live and learn.

I went to a friend's 21st. Got collected in morning hungover and taken to her house. Other guests were 4 deaf pensioners and her 14 yo sister. Sat on silence while the 21yo played with a puppet she'd been given (yes). Then her little sister played the organ - kept restarting cos made mistakes. It went on for hours and I couldn't escape cos was in another town so I needed a lift. Bizarre.

Parties are very hard to get right. I have been to some disasters and some great ones, all of which were not technically that different.
My learning points have been:

• small space plus lots of kids = nightmare
• not enough to do = fighting kids
• trying to do games whilst bouncy castle still up (a great temptation) = disaster
• bouncy castle in general - expect minor injuries!
• pinata= people are always upset somehow or other

-serving food at random time of day (ie not lunch/dinner) = kids don't eat it I highly recommend using a whistle to get the kids attention, have lots of short activities, let bouncy castle down for games/other sctivities, if in a hall hire a big one if possible and ask parents in advance if siblings are coming so you know how many to expect. I appreciate childcare can be hard esp for preschool ones but it is helpful to know. The last two years I have done a party in hall for about 20 kids with bouncy castle /games/ lunch for about £120. I a,ways lose control of the kids at some points but there haven't been major disasters yet - i try to remember the best and less good points of each party we go too!