About DH always taking my money! (Lighthearted, sortof)

[Cuttingthecheese]

He never, ever carries cash. I like to have some cash for bus fares, milk and bread ect.
He will go in my purse for change to pop to the shop, won't take the bit of change but will take the tenner then not put the change back! And doesn't tell me so I end up looking like a loony in the shop or on the bus.

AIBU to maybe kill him next time he does it?

Oh dear. This is unacceptable in a relationship is it? I do this to DH but in my defence a) he doesn't mind and b) I take care off all the bills and savings (electronically). Everyone and every couple have their own way of doing things.

It is fine to do if you both don't mind. But we would never just take money from each other without asking first. I don't keep a lot of money on me but what I do have has been drawn out for a reason. Like at the moment I have trip money for Christmas pantomime for 1 child to be handed in on Monday. Some change for school snacks, school Xmas dinners, school Xmas fete. Santa visit. Xmas jumper day. Xmas hamper raffle tickets etc. Also due baby this month so have some cash tucked away for petrol, snacks at hospital and parking. Basically pretty well what I need for next couple of weeks in cash as live quite far from nearest cash point. So yeah it would annoy me if oh took any of it and did not ask first as all of it is in there for a reason.

DH asks to go in my purse. It's polite. He does seem to be in need of cash often. We share money though so it doesn't matter either way. Especially now I have learnt to withdraw cash for two.

tootsie that's exactly it! The even more annoying thing is that there's a cashpoint at the shop

Why oh why can he not get his own cash out! We share all our money so that's not the issue. I don't need 'Paid back' I just like to know I have some cash for bits and bobs.

I like the idea of a cash jar but, I know his sounds rediculous he would just spend that too! It's like it burns a hole in his pocket. I put £20 in change aside in an envelope for parking/ taxi to hospital for DC's birth 4 months ago. I had to replace it twice in the two months run up to the birth and when it came to taking the envelope out the cupboard at crunch time guess how much was left? £3 sodding 45! So I had to send him off to get cash and stay on my own whilst in the later stages of labour waiting for him to come back to take me in! rage

This is therapeutic

It just meanness disguised as forgetfulness, isn't it?
to me its also theft.

do you like being with a tight bloke?
meanness is a disease that worsens with age.
good luck with all this.

i'd have dumped him the second time he did that.

DH and I are perfectly at ease with going into each other's purse or wallet if we need change or whatever, it's not overstepping the boundaries in our relationship. But always with a 'there's £4.50 in here, how much do you need for the car park tomorrow? ' , not just helping ourselves and leaving the other wondering where their money went.

He isn't mean or tight

It's joint money, from a joint account he's just annoying with cash!

I would find that incredibly irritating. Dh and I have a 'pin tin' which he keeps stocked for me (joint money but he has time without the dc to go to the cash point!) We both know how much is there and he would never leave me short, it's just annoying when you think you have cash and it turns out to be a handful of receipts!

Ooh, Cutting, he should have learned his lesson after the maternity taxi stunt! Lucky for him you were too busy having a baby to kill him!

i still wouldn't have it.

is he a bit of a man child?
if he can't sort out his own cash, then to me that falls into the category of man childishness.

We have a cash float in a drawer here - I top it up usually, keep about £100 or so there for whatever. I hardly ever top it up though, we don't seem to use much cash.

The labour taxi thing would have been the last straw for me.

What would he say if you just put a blanket ban on going through your purse? It's a PITA when you have been organised enough to sort yourself out but then someone else effectively sabotages it.

Not the same thing but my boss does a similar thing with me and stamps. She's always asking me if I have any stamps so that she can send her niece a birthday card or whatever. She says she'll give me the money but that's not the point. I don't want the 60p. I want to know there's a stamp if I need one in my purse and I don't want to keep having to replace the stamps which she has used up because she can't be arsed to sort it herself.

I'm loving the idea of a decoy purse.