I am 20 weeks pregnant, we have a DD of 21 months. I have hyperemesis, and generally don't do pregnancy well. Up until 6 weeks ago DH worked away, and I worked bank shifts when I could get childcare (mostly late nights, usually 10 hours in A+E, so no predictable sitting down/peeing/breaks etc). He has changed his job to be working from home and self employed. This seems to mean making a few phone calls and frequently disappearing to the pub. We have a very bouncy springer spaniel.
As he's home more WE agreed that I would take on as many shifts as possible up til christmas to top up my mat pay (zero hours contract). I have worked 60+ hours almost all at night each week for the last two weeks (only two weeks).
Although he's good with DD, he doesnt do proper bedtime routine (waits til shes past it then slings in grobag with clothes on (last night not even new nappy) and puts her in bed- no story, cant be bothered with teeth etc. He doesn't pick up after himself or her, never 'sees' a job, has walked the dog three times in two weeks. He has begrudgingly allowed me an extra hour or two in bed in the mornings on post work days (constantly interrupted by 'wheres the...etc') and this morning (i finished a 12 hour shift at 2am, got in at two thirty) DD woke up at 5 (hoping thats a phase) - i got up and did getting dressed, teeth, breakfast, playing, cleaned up broken glass he hadnt been bothered to clear up properly last night, sorted out kitchen (total pigsty) changed bedlinen on Dd and spare room as mil coming to stay tonight. I woke him up at 7.30 and asked him to take DD to Nursery (she goes two days a week, so I can work, the last two weeks he's taken her most (not all) days) and he told me to f off, that i was being selfish, unreasonable and unfair and basically not pulling my weight. Prior to this last couple of weeks as he's worked so full on I have done every early morning, all night wakings before she slept through, all housework, admin, i even do his bloody tax return. Am i being unreasonable to ask him since he's home now to do more? Like walk dog, take to nursery when I've had three hours sleep and doing same shift today, clear up, at very least do proper bedtime routine etc? I feel like he's being lazy and childish, but not sure if its just me being pregnant and unreasonable (as he argues)