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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Christmas!

47 replies

MagicChanges · 27/11/2016 14:54

To get frustrated at all the hype about christmas - all the TV adds that seem to start earlier every year, and all this black Friday stuff, people getting into debt, families falling out about whose going where for christmas. It is after all ONE day when we have a Sunday roast type meal. It's a money making racket for big business I reckon that somehow sweeps us along - or not. ARE there any families like the TV adds - 12 people sitting round the table with enough food to feed an army and a smiling woman comes in carrying the turkey - surely by the time it's carved and dished out all the veg will be cold!! OK rant over.............

OP posts:
Nanananananagigglebiz · 27/11/2016 15:56

I do think that it gets earlier every year and the hype, TV ads and commercialisation just spoils it which is a shame because Christmas is a beautiful thing.

Honeyandfizz · 27/11/2016 16:08

Its the best thing about the long dark winter. TV ads always start at the same time each year stop being such a misery. YABU.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 27/11/2016 16:13

YANBU OP, not in the slightest. It's not Christmas yet but it seems that instant gratification is the order of the day.

WTF is Black Friday in November? It used to be the last Friday before Christmas... now, like everything else, it's months in advance. I hate it.

I agree with everything in your OP and I won't be using Christmas emojiis either - at all.

I loved Christmas when it used to happen at Christmas time. I've never needed a six month lead in to it and I think it's pathetic that it's driven by consumerism and accepted as the norm. Not in this house it isn't. My husband wanted to put the tree up already in October. Crazy. Confused

SaltyBitch · 27/11/2016 16:14

Our family meal is bloody lovely. I look forward to it every year.

Hastalapasta · 27/11/2016 16:16

No live tv so no adverts! We have small kids so are going to sort out the Christmas stuff and get it ready for next weekend this week. [ f emoji ] without spaces gets you the festive hat Xmas Grin Xmas Smile Xmas Wink

Lorelei76 · 27/11/2016 16:21

Oh I hate it so much
My SAD is at worst in November and December
When the older gen are gone I'm going to spend Xmas somewhere sunny

I don't think much about the ads, I rarely see them
I like the famous grouse but don't even know if they still make those

Christmas gets harder and longer and duller every year
This year I have faked a reason to get out of the office do, which is good though

Jan and Feb - days get longer, snowdrops come out. Spring feels like a decade away now, at least at the start of Jan it will be a bit closer.

ittooshallpass · 27/11/2016 16:21

No family. Single parent. I find Christmas desperately lonely and despite trying really hard to fight it, sink into depression this time of year.

The adverts and joviality just highlight the pain even more. I hate Christmas.

Lorelei76 · 27/11/2016 16:24

Oh and, all the bars are heaving with Xmas parties from the start of December so harder to go for a drink after work to cheer up.

Come Jan, you can take your mates and have a sofa each in any bar. Me likey Grin

ILikeThatSong123 · 27/11/2016 17:26

YANBU.I agree. It's only one day, not even that long, by the time the afternoon comes, presents opened, lunch eaten, it's done until next year, all these hassle and stress is for the sake of that few short hours in one short day of the year. Personally I find it a big hype. I see it as something artificially made a lot bigger than it should be. There is pressure to buy, buy, buy for the people you might not even want to buy any thing for. Then equally, you end up with lots of so called presents you don't like and you don't want, from people you don't necessarily care about. Even if you budget very well, still some degree of overspending and overstretching and lots of pressure and stress.
Then even before the Christmas day ends, adverts loud and clear, about Boxing day sale, companies trying to get more money out of our pockets.
I don't like the oversentimentality of the movies about Christmas either, its like a conveyor belt, similar themes in almost all movies. When I was much younger and newly married etc, I used to do like other people I know, ie try to do big meal with all trimmings, buy thoughtful presents for all in our circle, clean and decorate the house, make it look very festive, basically kill myself over it and overspend, overspend, get depressed in Januaries. Now I'm in my fifties, a working mum to 11 year old dd and with a very tiring / stressful job , I changed my attitude some years ago and I'm much happier now.
I only care about getting some presents for dd and dh and a lovely neighbour of us who is a lovely elderly lady, who's been such a wonderful friend to me and my family over the years. I try to choose some present/s for only these 3 people with love and care and attention. I don't do anything else for anyone else, I gave up conforming to the present-exchange hype for all other people, several years ago and it works for us. My parents live abroad and they don't do Christmas, we don't see dh side of the family as I dislike his parents (toxic) and we stopped seeing them years ago and this works perfect for us.
As for Christmas dinner, I only cook what I can (can't cook/won't cook elaborate several dishes), our Christmas meal at home is not different to what I would cook leisurely on a normal holiday ie meat, seasonal vegetables, soup and rice etc, so it's only the food which i can cook comfortably, rather than sweating in the kitchen, trying to emulate the
perfection I see on tv etc. Dh likes cooking, he cooks sometimes and it's only a meal, nothing elaborate. If I had to accommodate any scale of Christmas party at my house, I would get overwhelmed with the massive expectations ( the expectation of perfection, even if its only self-inflicted) so nowadays I don't like to be a guest or host at Christmas. What I like about Christmas is, the quiet solitude of being at home with my immediate family (dd and dh), being off work and being lazy at home and catching up with reading etc.
I am a bit anti-social and a loner and an introvert and very happy with it.
Each to their own, other people do it the way they want and that's good for them. Live and let live.

Grilledaubergines · 27/11/2016 20:14

Black Friday is nothing to do with Christmas and I don't recall it ever being in December, during the few years since we adopted the traditional day after Thanksgiving (November) in the U.K.

SisterMoonshine · 27/11/2016 20:21

Think your mistake is seeing it as only one day.
I see the whole season as xmas: the music, the work do, the meet up with the in laws, the ads, the movies, the nativities, the food, the food, the lights, the markets, the garden centres, the good cheer and charity, the food.
It's better than one day.

Sparklingbrook · 27/11/2016 20:38

Black Friday is a bit to do with Christmas though. People are most likely to buy Christmas stuff on that day. They wouldn't want Black Friday in February or something.

Aaargh to Garden Centres/Christmas markets at Christmas and the adverts, music and work dos. I have seen 8 years of Nativities so i'm all done with that and no inlaws.

Looks like I am left with the food and the lights, charity and Wine Plus the annual viewing of Home Alone.

PunkrockerGirl · 27/11/2016 20:47

I love Christmas. But I do agree about the adverts where all the veg/trimmings are laid out and then the turkey arrives to be carved. Surely everything else will be stone cold by the time the turkey's carved Confused

PutDownThatLaptop · 28/11/2016 00:56

I love Christmas. My house looks like a grotto, I love the preparation, the wrapping, Christmas markets etc. My children are all with me even though two are adults. I make dinner for 10 people and agree that it is the whole season, not just one day.

MagicChanges · 28/11/2016 01:14

SO - I think that's a YES for most people who love christmas. Must admit now I'm retired I tend to forget that for working people it's a break from work and that used to mean a lot to me in my working days. OK so it's the season for many, rather than just the day. Feel SO sorry for the single mum who has no family and hates christmas and I can see why - all this stuff about happy families at christmas, which I'm afraid is something of a myth.

More people commit suicide around Christmas than any other time of the year and divorce lawyers will tell you that their busiest month is January!

Some of you seem to think I'm looking down on people who do enjoy it and I didn't intend to give that impression at all - I was just interested in other people's views. In fact I think it's nice that so many of you do enjoy the whole thing..............and thinking back I used to love all the cooking and collecting presents for months and hiding them away when the kids were young, but that was all a long time ago and my GC have so much stuff there's nothing I could give them to make them delighted.

There was a child (not related to me) but part of the christmas day meal etc at my son and DIL's last year and the amount of presents she got was ridiculous and she got so tired of opening them, she was frustrated and tugging at the wrapping. Later her mum just piled them all in a big box and the child didn't look at them - she was just relieved they were all open. Very sad. But then that's another issue.

OP posts:
kimmy3001 · 16/10/2018 20:56

YABU! I love to see the first few signs of Christmas creeping in! Adverts get the kids so excited that it's infectious! 

MakeAHouseAHome · 16/10/2018 21:07

YABU. I absolubtely LOVE our family xmas (3 of us and the dog!). My Partner knows I am never guving that up to go to his family for xmas so no awkward who goes where convos.

Bloody love xmas [santa]

MakeAHouseAHome · 16/10/2018 21:10

And agree with whoever said xmas isn't one day. For me and my family it lasts for 1st Dec to 2nd/3rd Jan! We literally have a full 10 days of xmas festivities, but the excitement starts when the decorations go up.

Cookit · 16/10/2018 21:12

I’m so excited about Christmas.

But I do hate some bits of it, particularly the adverts that make people feel guilty about not spending lots of money. The competitive angle over who can buy more plastic tat for their children is insane.

But the rest of it, the Christmas lights and carols and baking and reading Christmas books and all of it... I love it.

SuperGekkoMuscles · 16/10/2018 21:12

ZOMBIE THREAD!

It’s 2 years old, come on.

AllHallowsQueen · 16/10/2018 21:24

69 DAYS 2 HOURS AND 36 MINUTES TO GO!!!!

BiddyPop · 17/10/2018 09:13

Awww, can’t we still have a proper festive verbal punch up ?!?! Xmas Grin

I do love Christmas- but that doesn’t need to mean spending loads on it. I have over 50 people to give presents to (big, long living! Irish families) but the entire cost is about €1000. And we will have turkey and spices beef as we like those, but we use up everything (even though DH groans to see me stripping the carcass to make turkey stock!). I prefer to spend our money on treats we enjoy rather than empty calories- so we don’t buy tins of roses, we buy a big bag of Leonidas orangettes for the same price. And I spend my wine budget on 2 really nice bottles rather than a box of regular ones - making it special but not getting hammered.

someone mentioned working people needing the break - we are definitely still in that group, and also need some time to visit family scattered around the country.

But there’s no sign of Christmas at home yet - I am just working on my plans and starting my shopping (remember 50 to buy for!) so that it’s not totally stressful for December.

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