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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

The p.e. Questionnaire

29 replies

DonaldStott · 26/11/2016 00:42

Questionnaire sent home from dd's school today about p.e. she is 7.

They want you to fill it out with your kids.

Our dd is by no means sedentary. Very healthy. Eats healthily, plenty of activities. Enjoys scooting, walks at least nearly 2 miles on walk home from school. Plenty of friends to play with in park, long walks at the weekend. Swimming couple of times a week etc., but detests p.e.in school with a passion.

The questions are, do you do enough physical activities? Are you a leader?. What activities do you do outside of school? Do you enjoy p.e.?, do you think you are good at p.e.?

There are about 10 questions.

Every answer is designed to make her feel like a failure.

I don't want to fill it in with her.

She is a sensitive soul. Very kind, caring, more interested what's on the inside than what's outside.

Watches out for kids who are on their own on the playground and looks after them.

She has bcome a vegetarian as she thinks its mean to eat things that have parents Grin

P.e.is one aspect of things that she doesn't excel at, and if it was wiped it out, she wouldn't be arsed.

I know that filling this questionnaire out with her, would just highlight shortcomings in this area, and upset her, when she has so much more to offer.

Aibu to ignore it? They keep emailing it for us to fill out.

OP posts:
Original poster
DonaldStott · 26/11/2016 00:44

Sorry, this was sent home last week, and had been sent again this week as we hadn't filled it out.

OP posts:
Itsallgoodimtold · 26/11/2016 00:51

The example questions you give don't sound like they would present her as s failure. Don't take it too literally just say yes to the majority. Regular exercise out of school is swimming occasionally, leader playing any game whatsoever with parents etc. It's OK to be accurate about her feelings towards PE, that's the point so that they can encourage any children who don't like it

MrsTerryPratchett · 26/11/2016 00:52

I don't get it. The questions are, do you do enough physical activities? Are you a leader?. What activities do you do outside of school? Do you enjoy p.e.?, do you think you are good at p.e.? Yes, yes, lots, no, PE isn't good for me. All fine, surely.

Look at it as a way to communicate. Why does she love physical stuff and hates PE? That was my experience at school too and I wish someone had bothered to actually ask. Because it put me off exercise for decades when actually I love lots of kinds of exercise.

Original poster
DonaldStott · 26/11/2016 00:54

Yes I guess you're right. Thank you for answering. Just feel like it's geared to being physical, which she is not really. Will attach.

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 26/11/2016 00:54

BTW partly I think YABU because she might be sensitive but your job isn't to shield her. It is to build resilience. To be her positive reflection. To keep her story of self. It's a teaching moment.

Original poster
DonaldStott · 26/11/2016 00:55

Thank you mrsterry

OP posts:
ManagersDilemma · 26/11/2016 00:57

I don't think you should shield her from this. You could fill it in together and, if she gets upset, discuss how little it matters and how much she has to offer in other areas. She will come up against many other annoying/upsetting/infuriating things as she gets older.

Original poster
DonaldStott · 26/11/2016 00:58

Just designed to make kids who aren't 'physical' to not feel good

The p.e. Questionnaire
OP posts:
ManagersDilemma · 26/11/2016 00:58

Xpost, though MrsTerry put it better than me. My parents and I used to giggle together at how stupid we all thought PE was Grin

Original poster
DonaldStott · 26/11/2016 01:00

Thanks everyone. I will take it aibu and use it as a learning tool to say that you don't have to be brilliant at everything.

Appreciate all your responses.

OP posts:
ManagersDilemma · 26/11/2016 01:01

Having seen the questions, I think it has the potential to be positive. It has got to be better than being constantly ignored in PE lessons in favour of more able children.

MrsTerryPratchett · 26/11/2016 01:03

'Are you physically skillful' is the only totally bullshit question. Is she good at art or anything like that? Because that's physically skillful.

I would ask her what she would like the school to know about PE. Because I wish they had known a whole list of things.

7SunshineSeven7 · 26/11/2016 01:08

Yes, No, I try, Yes - I walk, yes/no, yes - I work well with other kids in class, yes, yes- I include others, yes as I know to include others which is important for a leader, Yes - swimming, walking, playing in park, No organised clubs but I do other activities.

That's how I'd answer them, I would not be trying to give an explanation. I hated P.E, there is a difference between being in a club you want to go to and being forced into a lesson where all the sporty kids go together and the non-sporty kids do so only half the class have fun.

BackforGood · 26/11/2016 01:08

I always think that, if an organisation (in this case the school) goes out of it's way to ask you what you think, then you should always be honest. Very different from going to the school unprovoked and complaining about the lesson or PE on offer.
I don't see how it would make her feel she is failing - you say she is physically active and there is room to get that across with those questions, it's just that what happens in lessons doesn't engage her. If that is the same for a lot of pupils, then they will look at how things can be done differently, so point out how she is taking part in something that could improve life for a lot of pupils both current and future.

Original poster
DonaldStott · 26/11/2016 01:09

Tbh, I have already had to have a word witb school because people have said when she goes on her team, 'oh were going to lose now she is on our team', so I am definitely oversensitive about it as she has been really upset nights befor p.e.'

But we always tell her, she is funny, clever, has a wonderful imagination and can crack out a tune like someone on the west end. We instil in her some people are good at some stuff, and some people are good at other stuff. Nobody needs to be brilliant at everything.

Thanks for giving me perspective.

OP posts:
7SunshineSeven7 · 26/11/2016 01:10

I always think that, if an organisation (in this case the school) goes out of it's way to ask you what you think, then you should always be honest.

Exactly this. Let her be honest about not liking the lessons and let them do something about it.

Original poster
DonaldStott · 26/11/2016 01:18

Definitely will do. Once again. Thanks. Think I was just blinded by protecting dd, but you are definitely right. Being truthful is the way to go.

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 26/11/2016 01:21

Don't go and all reasonable and listening and stuff. This is AIBU. You're supposed to say, "sod you all, I'm right". I can see where your DD gets her niceness from... Pfft.

Original poster
DonaldStott · 26/11/2016 01:24

Sorry mrsT. You're all a bunch of fucking vipers and my pfb can do whatever THE FUCK she wants. I'm going to home school

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 26/11/2016 01:27

YAY! Grin

Trethew · 26/11/2016 01:37

Appalling

Does a 7 year old know what a tactical decision is?

And a spelling mistake

Moaningmyrtille · 26/11/2016 01:57

Maybe the teacher will get 30 back that say they don't like a particular aspect of PE and they will change it. Or maybe they are looking to see if they have kids with secret out of school talents that they can help nurture.
I hated PE at school. I was so self conscious and just felt like everyone was looking at me trying to run about doing these activities. I didn't tell any of my teachers that I was gradually doing really well in a sport out of school.
By the time I was finishing high school, the sports teacher who was also my guidance teacher had given up on me and thought I was hopeless.
When she helped with my UCAS statement she got a big surprise as I was by then competing at national level.
A questionnaire like yours might have given her some idea what her pupils were capable of. I'm sure I wasn't the only person to hide a skill from school.

bridgetoc · 26/11/2016 02:43

Get a grip OP.......

AmeliaJack · 26/11/2016 02:52

It's all about perspective.

It's completely fine to be a bit rubbish at some subjects. Most people are. You can still participate cheerfully and enthusiastically and try hard even when you know you might always be a bit rubbish.

My DS for example sings with gusto and enthusiasm. How it sounds is considerably less important than the fact he tries. And in fact he has got a bit better.

If your DD is a bit rubbish at PE there's no reason she can't fill in the form honestly and cheerfully.

cuckooplusone · 26/11/2016 07:37

Hi OP

I genuinely think that the school would like all kids to engage positively in PE and are trying to get some feedback. I am a school governor and each year we spend time devising and analysing questionnaires to sense check what is happening in the school and how we could make a difference.

As an aside, I have been looking round secondary schools for my DD this term and I was impressed that one school streamed for PE. They had one stream aimed at kids who love team sports (hockey, football etc), one for kids who like social sport (tennis, badminton) and an aesthetic stream (dance, gym). I thought it was an interesting idea to engage with all the different kids.