Scatty husband driving me around the bend.

[Hideehi]

We are late for everything, holiday's days out ect are never a pleasure, always stressful because of his lack of organisation and ability to get on the job in hand.
He holds down a very responsible job which amazes me but it's as if they get all he has to give and he has nothing left for us.
I want to work, we need me to work really but how can i when he's so bloody unreliable.
I often wonder if i wouldn't be better off on my own.

Financially, probably not better off on your own.

Doesn't dh have any usefulness at all? Decorative? Top off the peanut butter? Witty conversationalist? Sing bass to your soprano?

If you really want to work, could you organise reliable childcare yourself and not expect him to be part of it?

He is just such a source of stress for me, really financially from what i have worked out i'd be better off alone with tax credits and maintance but he is their dad and that seems a bit harsh.

What does he need be organised about?

DH has a stressful and exhausting job, I also work p/t.

I do all the organising, I always have done, it's what I do, I don;t care if DH doesn;t do any of the organising, because he is crap at it.

he does have lots of thing he is good at. Earnign money. Playing with DS. DIY. Not minding when I beat him at Trivial Pursuit. Etc.

Not being organised is not the same thing as not pulling his weight around the home, it means i tell him what to do and he does it, cos for us, it works better that way.

I know several women who are incredibly organised in their business lives but will always be late, etc in their private lives - often the problem is trying to cram in too many things and being overly optimistic about how long it will yake to get somewhere, etc.

In our house dh is nearly always ready first - because I am the one getting a bag ready with nappies, sunscreen, drinks, etc which it would never occur to him to pack.....

KTeepee that is very true. Speaking as an optimist! I try so hard to be on time for stuff. And usually manage it if on my own, most of the time when with ds but not so easy if dh is around, he's even worse than me!

Things like paying bills, getting paperwork to the solicitor for our house purchase, we nearly lost the house today because he forgot to fax something and another set of buyers are snapping at our heels.
He's just hard work, i'm far from perfect but it's like having another child and I have 5 already, don't need another.

Why are you trusting him to do important things like pay bills and deal with solicitor if you know he's going to mess up?
Play to your strengths; what are his? If not now, when you married him?

Perhaps he's expecting you to take more responsibility and too polite/ditzy to tell you.

ps what makes you think you can predict how much maintenance would be paid and whether he would be at all reliable about coughing up?