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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to be furious at Social Worker disclosing to my neighbour that I reported safety concerns about her?

143 replies

ChickenVindaloo · 17/11/2016 18:31

You may have read my thread about being concerned for my elderly neighbour (early 90s, frequently falling, failing to wear emergency buzzer, screaming and crying in distress at all hours). The unanimous verdict was yes, report it to SW dept. I did so.

Today I got a missed call and a ranting text from my neighbour's daughter about "how dare I" report her/her mother? I was at work and could do nothing. I was scared they would be battering my door down or goodness knows what.

I phoned SW dept. They admitted they revealed my name and the full details of my concerns. They suggested I email complaints@(sw depts) about the breach of confidentiality/data protection.

AIBU to be furious and think they are not taking any of this seriously and should I report to information commissioner/press?

I am home now and all is quiet so far...I live alone.

Thanks.

OP posts:
ChickenVindaloo · 17/11/2016 18:32

My original thread:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/2778216-Im-worried-about-the-elderly-lady-next-door-May-be-sensitive?

OP posts:
BannedexPIPassessor · 17/11/2016 18:33

I'd complain, but go through SS complaints procedures first. If you're not satisfied, then take it further.
You did the right thing, and your neighbour's daughter is being an arse.

Olympiathequeen · 17/11/2016 18:33

I would do as they say and email a complaint. You did the right thing though so I would just try to forget the nastiness.

ChickenVindaloo · 17/11/2016 18:34

It transpires a gas engineer attended to cut the gas supply off yesterday to the elderly woman's house so it's clear I was not alone in my concern about fire risks. The elderly lady lives alone and has no carers apart from her daughter popping in.

OP posts:
Scribblegirl · 17/11/2016 18:34

That's appalling.

I still think you did the right thing Flowers

IWokeUpLikeThisHonest · 17/11/2016 18:34

I would certainly report this, the council should have a data protection officer if you ring customer services they should be able to tell you who it is. They should be contacting the family involved and doing some reparatory work too!

LineyReborn · 17/11/2016 18:36

I don't think the press will protect your confidentiality very much.

I would be interested to know, much more, how the Information Commissioner views this.

Sorry you had a crap experience.

ChickenVindaloo · 17/11/2016 18:36

Unbelievably, I also have a thread on here about a company withdrawing a job offer on the basis of an alleged reference which they will NOT disclose.

Starting to think the whole world is against me!

OP posts:
ChickenVindaloo · 17/11/2016 18:38

Can you imagine if I'd reported child abuse? I literally cannot believe a SW revealed my name. Have they absolutely no common sense never mind data protection training? And to not even WARN me they'd told the family!
I have heard horror stories about SW depts but never understood the sheer incompetence until now!

OP posts:
SimonLeBonOnAndOn · 17/11/2016 18:38

They shouldn't have revealed your details, but sometimes you have to have the courage of your convictions.
You're in the right here, and if her daughter wants to argue otherwise she needs telling straight.
Well done for doing the right thing.

GrumpyOldBag · 17/11/2016 18:38

Go through the correct forms complaints procedure.

Whatever you do, do not go to the press - it's a risky strategy, the press may well turn it against you and it will certainly turn you neighbour and SS against you even more.

ChickenVindaloo · 17/11/2016 18:40

I just want to live alone in peace! I will certainly think twice about doing the right thing in future!!

OP posts:
Leanback · 17/11/2016 18:42

Don't go to the press it will turn the whole issue into a spectacle. At the middle of this is a vulnerable elderly women who clearly needs help.

Scooby20 · 17/11/2016 18:46

If you want a quiet life why would you consider the press before you have even lodged a complaint?

NotYoda · 17/11/2016 18:47

Don't think twice!

The daughter is just being very defensive. Hopefully she'll calm down and realise she's angry with the wrong person.

I don't think it would take a rocket scientist to work out that it must have been a neighbour who had complained, which is not to say they should have revealed it was you. That's awful.

ChickenVindaloo · 17/11/2016 18:50

Thing is I'm in a block of flats so it could have been several other neighbours.

Yes, I do want a quiet life. I would rather have avoided getting involved in the first place. But if it takes going to the press to make sure this never happens to any other person just trying to do their civic duty then so be it.

True thought that I don't want the family to suffer any more stress eg via publicity.

OP posts:
HelenaDove · 17/11/2016 18:51

This is appalling. This thread probably will put ppl off reporting.

And if a gas engineer is turning off the gas i hope they are replacing with storage heaters not leaving an elderly lady without heating for weeks on end.

puddingbunny · 17/11/2016 18:53

Email them (cc-ing the head of social services) stressing your fears for your own safety given that you live alone, and telling them that you certainly won't be informing them of any further concerns you might have. Don't go to the local press yet, but say you are thinking of letting them know since it's a matter of public safety and people should be aware that if they complain to SS in your area they can't expect confidentiality to be respected.

justilou · 17/11/2016 18:53

Sounds like the daughter's mad because she's going to have to do more for her mum than just pop in. I know from experience that she probably shouldn't be judged for this - you don't know her relationship with her mother (who may not be simply a sweet, doddery, old lady). You can't force people to accept care if they don't want it. Nor can you force them to make changes to their lifestyle to improve their health and safety. Meanwhile - calling you at work was definitely out of line. I'm sorry about the job offer, too. What a crappy day!

Mishegoss · 17/11/2016 18:53

I don't see why you'd consider going to the press if you're so keen on living alone in peace.
Just follow the complaints procedure.

ChickenVindaloo · 17/11/2016 18:54

I can hear all the exchanges between the mother and daughter. The mother screams "no, no" and tries to fight her off when the daughter is, for example, trying to put her into bed.

OP posts:
ChickenVindaloo · 17/11/2016 18:56

It shows such a sheer, basic level of incompetence by the SWs that I highly doubt they can investigate themselves and then implement and enforce procedures.

Is anyone a SW? Do you get taught about confidentiality?

OP posts:
Leanback · 17/11/2016 18:56

Going to the press won't stop it happening to someone else again op. Mistakes are made all the time, even serious ones such as this. All going to the press will do is strain the relationship between social services and the general public even more.

If you went to the press without even following proper complain procedures you would be vvvvu. That's like refusing to take the free bottle of wine at the restaurant so you can leave a bad review on trip
Advisor.

ChickenVindaloo · 17/11/2016 18:57

Mishegoss, as I've said, I didn't even want to get involved in the first place. I'm trying to do my civic duty. And if that means causing a scandal to protect the next person trying to do the right thing then so be it.

I could do without this stress, I could barely concentrate at work and kept having to disappear to make/receive phonecalls. And I was worried about my flat lying empty while they are next door, raging.

OP posts:
hatgirl · 17/11/2016 18:58

Did you say you wanted to remain anonymous?

Unless people specifically say they want to remain anonymous it's generally assumed that the people they are ringing them about have a right to know why social services are visiting them.

Adult services works very differently to children's services.