Christening - folks staying overnight

[pacinofan]

Right, need the mumsnet jury on this one. DD2 is being baptised soon and dh's family are hoping to come (they are not local, around 300 miles away) BUT they have indicated that they will only come if we will put them up overnight as won't/can't do b&b.

This will mean putting up 10 people, 5 adults plus 5 children, plus our own family of 4. Not only do we not have the space (we don't have a large house) but I am really, really stressed out even thinking about entertaining the night before a christening. Or, am I being unreasonable? Would appreciate your comments, as right now I am seriously thinking of cancelling the event and just having a private do for our own little family.

Well I wouldn't put that many people up without adding the night before a christening!

I wouldn't have them all at my house; it would be a B&B or nothing.

I wouldn't cancel though. I'd call their bluff; tell them (in a really off-hand way) that I was sorry they didn't feel they could come to the baptism because of needing to stay in a B&B, but that I'd send them a photograph or two after the event.

I suspect they may change their minds pretty sharpish about not staying at a B&B ... and even if they don't, it will be much more pleasant for you not to have them there expecting to be entertained.

Stick to your guns, you already have enough on your plate.

no, that's ridiculous. You just can't!

Blimey, B & B or nothing. I can't stand selfish people! (them, not you!) xXx

is their a travel lodge near you? id be temped to book a few cheapo rooms and pay for them to stay there if it means they are out of your hair!

10 people is way too many. Would you consider it if it was just his parents (so no children).

I wouldn't travel 300 miles for a christening either to give the other side.

Thank you, mumsnetters, you have helped me to decide what to do - am definitely NOT having anyone to stay the night before christening, tough if it offends.

It's not just all the work getting the house ready for guests, it's all the entertaining too which, frankly, I can do without.

Hi - we had a similar dilemma and we smoothed it over by sending them details of B&B's near us - I think we ended up actually reserving some rooms for them which they paid for etc.. If you could try that it may come across less 'no bog off' 'ish and more 'would love you to come and I've done some searching for you' etc etc.. Hope this helps and good luck.

10 people?

agree that that is ridiculous and they need B&B or cheap hotel information.

But then, I have never travelled 300 miles for a christening either

Could you offer to put up just 2, the grandparents say, to show willing but say the others will have to do B&B.
help them organise it, send details etc.

If they're then still huffy, it's their problem. you tried your best.

Do you want them to come?

No,a million times no!

You want to enjoy the christening not worry about a house full of people wanting feeding etc.

Find a local travel inn and stuff them 4 to a room for £50. And if they're not willing to pay well, they're the losers because they'll miss the christening.

Actually I think they're taking the mickey expecting you to put them up!

i have travelled far more than 300 miles for my dniece's christenings, and got a bed with other relatives 0 would never do it to the person hosting the event, and WHY would they expect you to entertain - surely they will be there to help out & look after you?
get some other in laws!

No doubt they will help and look out for us (they are lovely people, honest!) but how can you possibly NOT entertain? You can't just allow folks to pitch up and not provide a warm, welcoming meal in a (fairly!) clean and tidy home, you just can't.

So far we have asked mil to stay, we wouldn't dream of not doing this, but I do think others could find a b&b and take the weight off our shoulders a bit.

I just cannot imagine getting up on the morning of the christening with a housefull and THEN having to sort out the buffet for the afternoon! Nightmare!

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