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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to not know how to cope alone

9 replies

EndoTheWorld · 16/11/2016 22:43

... I need someone with a car to help me out. I don't know to get round this. I'm poor, depressed, weepy, sick of trying to pretend to be fine, and dreadfully alone. People assume there is always someone who can help but there isn't. I don't know anymore. So many things tha would help so much just to have people I could turn to.

OP posts:
Craftylittlething · 16/11/2016 22:59

I'm sorry you're feeling this way, is there a gingerbread close by, they offer support to lone parents and the chance to meet new people. Also have a chat with your GP.

EndoTheWorld · 16/11/2016 23:04

Im not a mum, which is another cross to bear right now tbh. Sorry. I'm doing all the right things and asking for help in the right places but it's such a battle. It's like you need help to get help iyswim. The expectation that there will be someone fighting your corner, someone to meet you at hospital, etc. Now I'm having to fight the benefits system too so not really spare cash to buy the help/convenience I could before (Eg. taxis etc.)
Im so sorry, I just needed to say it "out loud".

OP posts:
Costacoffeeplease · 16/11/2016 23:07

Where I used to live there was a 'good neighbours' scheme where volunteers take people to hospital appts - anything like that nearby? My mil uses it when necessary

EndoTheWorld · 16/11/2016 23:13

Sorry, the hospital was just an example. That one will be ok as not too far so taxi ok, can budget. If they let me leave alone. I'm hoping someone can meet me but I feel all on edge because people are unreliable, things happen, I don't want to be relying on these people. I kept some people in my life who weren't good for me but finally cut loose. But this is why I hung on to them for too long! And why they could get away with stuff.

I'm trying to be practical about each thing in turn and not get overwhelmed but it just all hit me at once, sorry.

OP posts:
EndoTheWorld · 16/11/2016 23:16

It's the assumption that you have close family of friends you can rely on that gets me the most. It's excruciating to have to spell it out. A concerned dr wrote I had "no friends", which isn't true, but there's a gulf between friends you can spend time with (although thin on the ground) and people you can actually ask favours of.

OP posts:
SeventyNineBottlesOfWine · 16/11/2016 23:39

I'm sorry to hear you're feeling like this.
Sometimes though if you just try asking someone for a favour, you find out they're overjoyed to help!
People feel good about themselves when helping others!
I used to find it difficult to ask people for help. I'm often too fiercely independent ad don't like to admit that sometimes I can't cope.
People do understand though and will be there for you!

BadKnee · 17/11/2016 00:36

The Samaritans will listen
The Citizen's Advice will help you navigate the Benefits system.

Call them

And I understand OP - it is not easy.

EndoTheWorld · 17/11/2016 01:05

Thank you

OP posts:
user1477282676 · 17/11/2016 03:49

Are you physically well? If so I recommend checking gumtree or freegle for a bike...I got mine for nothing.

I go everywhere on it....it's a lifesaver.

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