To think it's not hard to put the toilet seat down

[WallToWallBastards]

And to not piss all over the floor?????

Currently putting up with an unwanted house guest who is quite happy to doss around, leaving mess everywhere, putting his dirty shoes and feet on the table scratching it, hiding in the kitchen using the WiFi for gambling sites and porn drinking endless coffee and eating all the bread. This is annoying enough but the collection of pubes stuck all over the shower and toilet seat are doing my head in. The inability to put the toilet seat down after weeing all over the floor is too much. My blind grandfather can manage to wee into the toilet and put the seat down.

I've put an adult content block on the Internet and have sat turning the WiFi on and off and it's making me feel much better but I'm not sure what I can do to console myself about wee drenched socks and the trauma of falling arse first into cold toilet water at night.

Can you not just say "please wipe up your piss"? Or better yet, ask them to leave?
Laughing at the wifi!

He's a stroppy 14 year old boy in the body of a bloke in his 50s and has been communicating solely through grunts, any polite requests are met with being called an evil bitch/ruining his life/don't care about him etc. He's currently sofa surfing around the family and everyone's fed up of and unwilling to have him back for the 3rd and 4th times. He's meant to be moving into a flat with a cousin, so until then we're just grinning and bearing it.

I can hear him grunting every time he loses the signal

good grief, sounds dreadful! I hope he's gone soon

Reminds me of when my younger (17 at the time) brother lived with me do five or six months. This was a looong time ago. His room would stink of sweaty socks and I had to run a bath and tell him to get in it, or I'm sure he never would have washed.
You have my sympathy OP.

I'm sorry but peeing on the floor is not acceptable. I'd block him from the internet completely until he starts being more respectful. If he is ever on the phone, or has a friend over, i'd be very loudly complaining (so they can hear) how he must have a problem if he can't control himself from peeing everywhere when he used the toilet! He sounds like a right little shit, you don't disrespect anyone or their home when they're good enough to put a roof over your head when you have nowhere to go!

I have the very thing for you. I have a soft close toilet seat but it just wont stay up (for male use). Apparently a few male relatives have been hit where it hurts.

I think i misunderstood you that he was actually 14, if he is actually a 50 year old man thats even worse!

MissVictoria with the smell of shitty aftershave it would be difficult to believe he was in fact an adult with a respectable job, it would be easier to understand if he WAS an angsty teenager!

He hasn't come home tonight what a shame

I feel your pain OP, I grew up with 3 brothers, all three of them were incapable of putting the toilet seat down and often their aims weren't entirely accurate. Did my nut in as a teenager.

My suggestion is put up a passive aggressive sign in the bathroom off the internet.

He sounds like a nightmare.

Every time he pees on the floor, hand him a mop and bucket and tell him he has to clean the bathroom floor. He's got a fucking nerve treating your house like this.

Or to put the empty toilet roll IN THE BLUMMIN' BIN!
(Yet to find the culprit/s but I have my suspicions. Obviously, no one admits to it)

You need to tell him, in front of as large an audience as possible, that as he continually fails to be able to pee in the toilet you're putting your foot down and if he wishes to continue to stay with you he needs to do a sit down wee!!!

It's utterly disgusting that he can't get his aim right, It's lazy and pathetic!!!

YANBU to be furious with him and to be honest I'd change the wifi password and to earn it for each day he has to not piss all over your floor!!!!

I feel the toilet seat isn't the thing you should be most annoyed at here. That's not really a problem, the other stuff is

Tell him if he can't aim he needs to sit. I know I'm going to get it in the neck fir this but just want to ask the question why woman always want the toilet seat left down - but don't leave it up when they know men will be following?

But I do agree, common courtesy, esp when in someone else's house would be to clean up after yourself.

Calling you a bitch and pissing on the floor? Stick his stuff outside and change locks.

Personally I'd stop enabling his behaviour. Put his stuff outside the door with a list of nearby shelters.