Health Visitor

[Charlalala]

I really am not happy with my HV
DS is 6 weeks tomorrow and is my first child.
She came to my house day 10 and made me feel really inadequate for not knowing about all the sure start classes or having signed up to anything.
DS was also fussy when latching on at first and so was doing the on-off-on-off routine as I had come to get used to before latching for long usual feed and she made me feel like is was doing it all wrong and I got so stressed that I cried and then the baby then wouldn't latch at all and she tried to make me show her my nipples for her to inspect in case they were a problem. (Midwife had already given support and I was attending BF worshop, which I told HV).
Had same HV at 6 week check today and again she made me feel useless because DD had dropped from 98centile to 91centile in weight, and I had to press her to confirm that everything is in fact fine with my 12lb6oz 6 week old baby!
Just can't stand her. She is so patronizing and unsupportive. Bad bedside manor I would call it!

I don't even know if I have to see her again because she didn't make any of that clear if/when next appointment would be and I just wanted to get out of there. DS started crying and she kept asking me why!

Does anyone know how often we have to see the HV and if I should complain to someone or am I being overly sensitive?

Sorry for length and any faux pas - this is my first post!

Following the 6-week check we haven't seen a health visitor at all, DD is almost 4.

They cancelled the 5-6 month weaning advice visit, and then the 12 month check as there weren't enough staff.

DD was absolutely fine, breastfed until 2 and developing appropriately.

So no YANBU as they're not particularly essential IMO.

My HV was lovely. Saw her a few times in the first 6 weeks and as DC & I were both doing well she said she'll be in touch around 4/5 months to discuss weaning.

OP with my DC1 I really struggled with BF. HV's advice was "avoid champagne".
With DC2 I was undergoing treatment for leukaemia, she told me to complete PND questionnaire "as if you don't have leukaemia" ... wtf!!
But one was helpful when I was at screaming point with a challenging toddler.
Moral of the story - if she's not helping you ignore her!

Our HV was absolutely horrific. Had a 3 week old baby, a nearly 2 year old...and she was moaning about tea being on the kitchen bench. I had made the cup just minutes before she dropped in on me. She also whined about my daughters toys being all over the sitting room floor

Midwife on the other hand (she was checking me every few days both for BF support and to see how well stitches were healing) told me that she would be concerned if my house was spotless in my situation.

I had a really nice supportive HV who continued her visits for over a year which in fact I appreciated. but that was a 'deprived' area at that time.

I'm really lucky in that my hv is bloody fantastic, she helped me through pnd, never puts me down and never tells me what I should be doing with any of my children.
She does tells me the NHS guidelines but never in a patronising way (obviously has to as it's her job) but then says I'm the parents so ultimately up to me.

But with my middle dd the hv was awful, wouldn't help me with my 3 year old asd son and looked down at me.
So it does depend who you get and and you have every right to not see them or at least ask for a new hv.

having The area I have moved to is classed as deprived by our local council so that makes sense why they keep contacting me.

Thanks for the advice.
Good to know others have had similar experiences.
She also made some pretty negative comments about the midwives, all of whom have been amazing, that got my back up and I thought v. unprofessional

I know there must be some great HVs out there so don't want to tarnish all with the same brush.

Will just ignore her comments, continue as usual and hope I don't come across her again!